Prism and perspectives

A Dance about Cosmic Equilibrium - Story of Lord Nataraja

2012-01-14T21:33:00.000-08:00

From Wikipedia:

In 2004, a 2m statue of the dancing Shiva was unveiled at CERN, the European Center for Research in Particle Physics in Geneva. A special plaque next to the Shiva statue explains the significance of the metaphor of Shiva's cosmic dance with quotations from Fritjof Capra: "Hundreds of years ago, Indian artists created visual images of dancing Shivas in a beautiful series of bronzes. In our time, physicists have used the most advanced technology to portray the patterns of the cosmic dance. The metaphor of the cosmic dance thus unifies ancient mythology, religious art and modern physics."

CERN as we know, is no Just-for-jolly Research organization. It is very well known for it's Large Hadron Collider. They have given the world which now the world can't function with out. None other than, The idea of World Wide Web sprung from the very heart of CERN. More than programming languages/technologies that run on top of internet, the fundamental aspect that amuses me is it's elusive yet comprehensible all-pervading nature, spread out to every nook and corner. An invisible fabric that connects us in this ever-ripping apart universe.

[ Reference: http://www.fritjofcapra.net/shiva.html ]

And this very people behind such technology and science, suddenly drop all their rationality and logic to unveil a statue of Dancing Shiva.

Why would they do it? Doesn't it surprise you? It surprises me. They have given various explanations, all pointing towards a subtle balance in this universe. A balance between the poles; Good and bad, right and wrong, acceptable and the unacceptable, virtue and vice, that and this, etc. Indeed, the explanations are true enough that this art form indeed stands for balance. I have listed down the explanations based on my understanding after reading few books on the topic and have added a couple of notes which I personally believe so. So, the opinion here is subjective.

Here goes the explanation:

*) This statue explains the Creation of Basic Elements, Sustenance of Balance and the final Destruction.

*) The hand operated drum represents the Sound from where Space came into being. The very fabric that is omnipresent and all-pervading. Big Bang theory which explains the creation of universe, Cosmic Microwave background information and every single scientific theory hence on, is moving towards explaining that Space and time was created at the time of a creation of universe, with a Big Bang!!

*) The depiction of wave motion in the hair and cloth represents Air.

*) The left hand holds Fire

*) The holy river Ganges on the head represents Water

*) The right foot firmly standing represents Earth

*) The raised left foot with a lifted toe [ observe the big toe closely ] represents entry of "prana". The only scientific reason I can think of is; In the brain, there are maps on the outer surface which corresponds to various organs of the body. [Reference: Phantoms in the Brain by VS Ramachandran]. The reproductive organ's map is at the very front of the lobe and just adjacent to it, we have the map for our foot. The same concept applies to all genders. So, It is an aesthetic way of representing the creation of life through reproductive organs.

*) The raised palm of the right hand represents protection. Hence, the imperative to be sincere and devoted towards the truth.

*) The downward looking palm signifies the final deluge. Every thing ends as ash to be washed away in water. Irrespective of what we are and what we do, we are reduced to that final form. So, we better be good while we are here. I often think being good and being right can not be two different things. Both has to be one and the same. What is right is what that is good.

*) The crescent moon represents the Cosmic Mind.

*) The serpent represents the Life force, Kundalini Shakthi which is dormant in our first level of our subtle body. There are seven planes through which this force can rise through. The seven planes are Mooladhara, Svadishtana, Manipuraga, Anahata, Vishuddhi, Ajna and Sahasrara. The life force raises through this chakras to merge with the ultra cool cosmic mind at the top most level, Sahasrara. The interesting thing to observe is Lord Shiva is called "Soma Suriya Agni Lochana" which Means that Sun is also part of Him. If we closely observe the statue, Along with the moon, Sun is also seen to it's side. This signifies that the Life force raises through all the levels and after attaining intelligence, the truth shines as wisdom. Yet with the wisdom he has obtained, Lord Shiva is cool and composed signified by the Crescent in the statue. A complete attainment of Total wisdom, calmness and peace and that is Shiva. If one can retain that 24*7, 365 days all through their life, then that One is Sada Shiva. [Meaning: Always Shiva] That state of Sada Shiva is represented by the Five headed snake with it's hood over the head protecting and retaining the peace. It signifies existence as a equilibrium.

[Reference: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chakra]

*) On the whole, Statue represents Earth, Water, Fire, Air, Space, Mind, Intelligence and Ego. The less and subtle truth that is left out is Brahman. An All-pervading, Pervading all entity that gives us every moment with the hope that we will stop running, stand and wonder at its grandeur. To put it in Einstein's words, "The only incomprehensible thing about the universe is it is comprehensible". The Ring outside the statue represents this ultimate truth that our rationality, science, logic is all confined to this space and time created at the beginning. All will come to an end, and will merge into the ultimate reality of Brahman outside the scope of time and space. And all this goes on in a cycle. It has to be accepted. Myth or reality, the key lies in acceptance.

With this knowledge, let us all strive hard towards peace and prosperity of one and all. All the world is one and with the global good as the fundamental goal, let our efforts bring us success and victory.

Notes:
There are several references to the Cosmic dance of Nataraja and it is said that Lord Shiva danced his Rudra Thandav in five places. I come from a place called Tenkasi/Courtallam, where Lord Shiva has said to have danced in the Chithira Sabhai. I comprehend this myth as places from where the ancient Seers and Vedic Rishis realized the subtle balance in this Universe. In this Context, Chidambaram is considered as the Center of the Universe and has a grand temple for Lord Shiva with "All-Pervading" Space as its' closely guarded Secret.

And May be, it is appropriate that Lord Nataraja Statue was unveiled at CERN when the contemporary scientists comprehended this Cosmic balance!! Indeed Surprising! At last, we realize the truth is beyond equations and Truth manifests love and care for humanity. Om Tat Sat.

Other Links:
http://karthickhariharan.blogspot.com/2011/09/being-siva.html

http://karthickhariharan.blogspot.com/2011/11/understanding-understanding-myth-and.html

Reference Book:
Relevance of Indian Philosophy to Modern Mankind by R.VijayaRaghavan.

A Visit to the South of South

2011-12-27T20:13:00.000-08:00

My father works in a rural bank in Nagercoil area. He has always boasted about the resplendent beauty of Kanyakumari district and we decided to enjoy it during this Christmas vacation[2011]. The district is not totally new to us. By Us, I mean, my brother, me and my mother.

My grandpa, Mr.Visveswaran worked as District Educational Officer and was stationed at Nagercoil. I did my kindergarten there at St.Johns'. My younger brother Koushick came into existence there! My father lives in a town called Parvathipuram known for it's distinctly orthodox surviving Brahmin cult amidst the mundane developments around. Every single village in this district has a beautiful pond surrounded by Coconut trees and warm sunshine.

So, we started from Madurai. My mother works in a Govt. School near Madurai. My Grand ma, Mrs.Raji Mani wished to join us and she had a ambassador to help us with the travel. Lucky us! For all you folks who wish to travel and visit temples there, please find accounts of our travel below. We planned the trip for 2 days.

My father had rented a house for his work at Parvathipuram and had arranged for food in a nearby house of an orthodox brahmin Mami, Mrs.Sundari. Her style of cooking was exactly same as the style adopted in my native village, Melapavoor, Near Tenkasi.

Driver: Paandi Anna

Dec 23rd, 2011 [ Friday ]

Started Travel at 11pm from Madurai. Excellent Highway road. Good Carnatic music to give company and keep the driver and me awake. But, this is a highly accident prone road. So, we decided to stick to average speed of around 65-70km/hr. Parvathipuram is around 280kms from Madurai.

Stopped at few places to take some tea. Any night travel without tea breaks does not make sense! And yes, it was pretty cold.

Dec 24th, 2011 [Saturday]

Reached Parvathipuram at 5am. Took a short nap for 3 hours. Started our visit to temples at 9am after having breakfast.

Kids were blissfully enjoying their winter holidays and the usual bovine boo grazing it's food!

An ideal atmosphere to relax from a busy routine. I am not a very busy man but that didn't stop me from relaxing my mind!!

We visited Suseendram Dhanumalayan temple. This temple is known for it's huge statue of Shri Anjaneya Swami. Since it was both Saturday and Birthday of Shri Hanuman, there was a huge rush. It was said, around 10,000 people visiting the shrine at any point in time that day.

Suseendram Temple

Next, we went to Kanyakumari. Since it was mid day then, the Kanyakumari Amman Temple was closed. We waited for the ferry for about an hour and then visited Vivekananda Memorial and 133ft Thiruvalluvar Statue. Both are marvels and speak volumes about scriptural and sculptural talents of the south of south!

Incidentally, Dec 24th happened to be the day when Swami Vivekananda swam across to the rock to meditate upon the ultimate truth to discover his purpose. So did I, but in a boat! I am not very sure about discovering the purpose yet!

Amma and Koushick

Amma with Raji Paati

Rain water harvesting at Vivekananda Memorial

Muttom Church

Vallu Ji - A closeup - Crows never spare any statue!

Reached back Parvathipuram at 4pm to have a late lunch at Mrs. Sundari's house. Delicious is a underestimation. Had a heavy lunch and took a short nap to attend the function organized in the Lord Krishna Temple in the agraharam [ Streets where Brahmins live ].

Kolam by Raji Paati

Excellent Darshan. Divinity incarnate. Superb super delicious prasadham in Kerala Style!

Two lovely little pups were around all the time!

Had good dinner and back to rest.

Dec 25th, 2011 [ Sunday ]

Christmas it is! Visited the following temples.

*) Kalliyangaadu Sivan Temple. This place has a Thiruvasagam Sabai [ Where ThiruVasagam is recited ]. The place was also known as SivaPuram.

*) Thackalay Perumal Temple. This has a separate sannidhi for Lord Saneeshwaran.

Pond at Thackalay

*) Keralapuram Adisaya Vinayagar. The lord Vinayaga in this Lord Siva temple changes color from Black to White and Vice versa every 6 months from Uthrayanam to Dakshinayanam and viceversa. Serene and Tranquil.

Huge Banyan Tree at Keralapuram

Prahaaram at Keralapuram

*) Thiruvattaru Adikesava perumal Temple. 76th Divya Desam of 108 divine places for Perumal. One must visit this place at the least to admire the grandeur of this temple and rituals. Purely Chera style! Pristine beauty. One must observe that the shrine consecrated here is the inverse of the usual Sleeping position of Lord Vishnu and does not have Lord Brahma in Lotus strung from his belly button. This means, this relates to a cosmic state before creation of Brahma.

Lunch at Chungankadai Gowri Shankar Hotel. Helped a Marathi Brahmin couple understand the significance of Eruseri, A delicious dish specially served to the newly married on the third day in this district especially among Brahmins.

Back to home for rest. Visited friends of appa and amma in the evening.

*)Nagercoil Nagaraja temple. This temple is the namesake for this 11th largest city in TamilNadu.

Back to home at Parvathipuram for night rest.

Dec 26th, 2011 [ Monday ]

*) Vadasery Krishnan - Cuteness defined. Scintillating Rituals. Cute Lord Krishna in His undies!

Started off to Madurai at 11am. Reached Madurai by evening 5pm. Had an excellent trip and a peaceful way to bid goodbye to 2011 and welcome 2012. New Year Wishes!! May this New year bring prosperity and happiness to every one!!

Heart Full of Hypocrisy

2011-12-21T21:59:00.000-08:00

Category: Short Story

All the world's indeed a stage! Men may come and Men may go, Hypocrisy lives for ever. In fact, the order of the day is Hypocrisy. I laugh at people who are predicting about a global catastrophe; an invincible doom for man and mankind. I laugh by rolling on the floor and to some extent even on the ceiling as the doom had already arrived and the seeds of it, deeply rooted in men's hearts filled with hypocrisy.

Is it that difficult to live simple and straightforward? Why should a man pander to the egos of men around him? Isn't the real quality of virtuous naturally self-luminous with out wanting conformity and acceptance from others? If at all anything is wrong, my parents have been totally wrong teaching me the right things. Trust me, it doesn't work.

Socrates was killed for saying democracy is a little too noisy. Correct me, If I am wrong. Galileo was jailed for being able to confirm that the earth goes around the sun. Luckily the world has become relatively safe. Joseph St.Denis, an auditor just have to resign from his job to say that the financial systems were not functioning the right way. In a way, the hypocrites have always found the way to rule over simplicity and truth; whatever the truth is! In any case, as long as men's hearts are controlled by fear, the world will be ruled by hearts filled with hypocrisy.

I don't have a solution. In fact, this is just a note written on my way to the glut. At least, to be called sane, have a normal married life, I will have to limit myself to being something in tune with the rhythm of the contemporary world order. But, I wonder how long can I survive and preserve the sanctity of my heart. It will be sucked into the mundane chaos of this irrevocably twisted life. I pity thee, poor organ in one corner of my body.

When I think of heart, I am immediately reminded of its sincerity. Irrespective of what we are and what we do, it continues to work with out stopping for a moment. In fact, Death is just a reminder that when heart stops, we stop. What have we done in return to our beloved friend? Well, we have fused and conditioned our brain enough to betray our hearts. We suppress it. We have even come to the point that we condemn and groom people not to make emotional decisions.

Melodramatic is the derogatory word used to describe those emotional fools. Take it from me, It is not really that bad to pity yourself. For god's sake, take pity on yourself. In fact, it is rightly when, you start taking care of yourself. A mother takes pity on the child, then comes love, then comes care and then the emotional bonding.

Initially, I was totally perplexed by the dishonest pursuit of money and fame. I come from a humble village background where life means to live. Fate be it, I was forcefully sent to a premier institute as my parents felt there was no more life left to live in the country side. Alas! what a pathetic mind I possess; I could easily convince myself to study honestly not for grades but for the sake of understanding. Should I call myself blessed or the unfortunate? I will leave it to the reader. The real joke is, however hard I tried, I couldn't understand. Rightly then, as I deserve, I took up a job!

Excuse me folks. I am stuck. I can't write any further. I tried hard. I couldn't do it. I wanted to tell a convincing story that the world has become hypocritical and yet if at all anything is good, being virtuous is the right thing to be. I will leave it you as I have left it to myself. Am I not hypocritical to call this a story while I have done nothing but talk about a practically theoretical topic. Just a hypocritical guilt!

Hold on! I have to overcome this guilt. I have to somehow overcome this guilt! In the first place, why should I be guilty at all? Looking back, I have been sincere in my studies, work, love, family, friendships. But, nothing has worked out in my favor. My professors said that world is ripping itself apart; My manager preached that there is no sincerity in any work; my love thought that all relationships are bound to break; My family resented that there is no way to live without pandering to your superiors; My friends mistook my shyness for arrogance and so on. All I can take away is that the world has misunderstood me. But, I am finding it very difficult to hold on to that belief for long. Looking around, I have begun to think that their words are so true! The world is indeed ripping itself apart! In this irreconcilable world, How am I protect the sanctity of my heart and hence my guilt.

One must stand here and wonder at the brilliance of a mask. I did. I have to accept the role given to me. I have worn this mask. I see myself through my writing. I wear that mask, tell lies about me, call myself a writer but the simple fact is I am not telling just a story. Out of the blue, the cloudy mists of ignorance falls apart and rising hope of sun light emerges in my mind. This entire journey I shall hope to discover and rediscover myself. I have to hold on to my belief as long as possible for I know that is the right and virtuous. If I am bound to break, I will. But, I will resist hard. And If I fail, that shall be my last war to protect my kingdom. I shall not, I hope not fail for my failure is not mine but of truth.

The Ultimate Truth

2011-11-24T23:16:00.001-08:00

I must apologize for using such a scandalous title for this blog article but I couldn't find another equally scandalous one. What is in a title!! Content is King. So here it goes...

As Plato says, Philosophy is a luxury. Indeed and if it is true, I am thriving in that luxury of late. Ah, That dear delight of pondering over obscure phenomena is certainly addictive. Anyhow, I have always wondered how would the ultimate truth look in a mathematical equation. Well, the entire purpose of science is to arrive there finally. Around 1500 B.C, it was sufficient to communicate the truth via an objectively accepted medium called language by the most learned and erudite scholars. Now, the medium seems to be Mathematics.

In any case, truth is simple and elegant. That Truth is One, Complete and Infinite. What is one equation that would display all those qualities. As said in the beginning of Ishopanishad,

Om puranam adah purnam idam purnaat purnam udachyate,

Purnasya purnamaadaaya purnam evaavashishyate.

Literal Meaning:

That is infinite, this is infinite;

From That infinite this infinite comes.

From That infinite, this infinite removed or added;

Infinite remains infinite.

So, The truth is something which retains its qualities as it was after any kind of operation done on it. The result of such an operation also reflects the qualities of operated variables. The question is how many variables are there and what is that operation that yields such a result.

I guess most probably it would look like this

1 * 1 * 1 * 1.....[Infinite] times = 1

Just for laughs!

Understanding "Understanding" - The Myth and the Mystical

2011-11-10T06:05:00.001-08:00

Previous Posts:
The How and What of Brain

The Myth and the Mystical:

A fundamental question remains unanswered. While we have mentioned earlier that along with ego and identity, consciousness of existence too arises very much in the brain. So what is Consciousness?

I shall summon the well respected Philosopher J. Krishnamurti for the answer. Consciousness as he would define is nothing but Content. The degree of consciousness gives us awareness. The extent to which we are aware helps us in observation and therefore detail. If we can negate our conditioning and continue to exist in a state of perennial consciousness, now that is Being Siva, The Lord from the Indian Myth. I am reminded of a quote in the film, Karate Kid,

There is a difference between being Still and doing nothing.

Many people attribute being still as being lazy. There is a disorder called "akinetic mutism" where the subject suffers from blankness with no thoughts and frozen in time. They detach themselves from any kind of work and totally lack concentration and focus. But Being Still is an altogether different business. There is constant negation of conditioning and this process is totally different from denial or neglect. There is continuous perception and each perceived thought is received as objectively as is by negating the conditioned reasoning of our intellect. There is no conception of thought out of conditioning and is negated by the same way as it is done for perception. Everything can be accepted and raised to that state by constantly negating our conditioning thereby our limited ego and identity. Please note that, Intelligence from experience and Know-How is not negated.

Consciousness certainly evolved as organisms evolved. Darwin would attribute it to random mutation where as Wallace, the twin scientist and the less known Founding fathers of evolution would argue, how random can the traits for intricate arts, Complex Mathematical abilities could have evolved? The genes get mutated in random is an assumption and is commonly accepted. May be the assumption is wrong and everything happens in a deterministic fashion yet elusive to Human Mind.

Such is how common moral imperatives evolved into law of the land. To quote Thomas Henry Huxley,

"What we call rational grounds for our beliefs are often extremely irrational attempts to justify our instincts"

In any art, there is a sense of elevated consciousness in the performer and admirer. There is no objective minute by minute calculation, yet the archer hits the bull's eye by just focusing on the mind. Everything and Every action must be elevated to this highest state of complete action. Just in tune with the rhythmic tune of universal consciousness. In other words, in sync with the cosmic dance of Lord Nataraja.

Conclusion:

I was surprised to find out that apart from neglect and denial, the most surprising defense mechanism of our brain is Humor. Grimace, A little smile evolved for threatening and asserting control and to negate the same, Humor evolved. It eases the tension and provides a amicable environment for the group to function.

Brain holds onto the illusion of control on the self and group to assert, lead, manage. But, the notion is just to satiate the ego and provide coherence. You can train yourself to accept the decontrolled objective reality of human insignificance in this grand cosmos and yet function with 100% efficacy. In fact, that is the only way to attain 100% efficacy.

Brain is amusing and magical because even when some circuits are poorly developed, it allows to provide some thing else in abundance that makes the whole world drop their jaws in awe and wonder. For example, take Savants who suffer from deteriorated Mental and physical health yet stand out unique in some of their talents. Refer Top 10 most fascinating Savants in the world

It is very difficult yet only reasonable cosmic purpose is that the universe in it's process of creation have blessed us with consciousness to comprehend the universe and stand as a witness to it's grandeur. Just like looking ourselves in a mirror and admiring, Universe is looking at itself through us. We must raise ourselves to look ourselves in the Universe and Universe in us.

All Said, Living is jolly good fun for living's sake. There goes a famous quote by our well known Anonymous Philosopher,

"Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun."

So, Don't miss it.!

References:

Phantoms in the Brain by V.S Ramachandran
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goldman
A Wholly Different way of Living by J.Krishnamurti
Theory of Everything by Stephen Hawking
Philosophy: Who needs it? by Ayn Rand
What do you say after you say Hello ? by Eric Berne
Introducing Carl Gustav Jung by Maggie Hyde and Michael McGuiness
God does not Play dice by David A Shiang
Tao of Physics by Fritjof Capra
Code name God by Mani Lal Bhaumik

Understanding "Understanding" - The How and What of Brain

2011-11-10T06:00:00.001-08:00

Previous Post:
The Phantoms in the Brain

The How and What of Brain

I ain't going to get into neuro-biological details of the Brain, it's systems, and intricate details. I intend to talk only at the conceptual level. If you are looking for more detail, I would recommend you to refer to a Biology Text book and make sure you look at the brain of a Human for clarification.

Fundamentally, Brain is generally said to have two hemispheres, the left and the right. One another less stressed fact is Brain does have a front and a back. Data is received, processed, manipulated if necessary, verified before every single output and all this happens akin to a Zen Master performing Martial Arts.

The Reductionist approach of identifying each functional unit and putting it together doesn't necessarily give the correct view of Brain's functional overview. Comparing Brain to an Engine is not exactly fair as Brain seems to be much more than that. Brain can surprise us, shock us, Hold us in awe and wonder and never will we able to figure out how did such and such thought ever rise and how such a miracle worked.

God works in mysterious ways, so does Brain. But, it is certainly comprehensible. The systems in the Brain and it's neural circuitry have evolved to work wonders for Man and Mankind. Behavioral Psychologists and Evolutionary Psychologists might claim that Societal Pressure and Favorable condition warranted the necessary mutation and growth of the Brain as known and observed today. But, this does not give the complete view.

Let us take a Tribe destined to live in forest/jungle for all his life. If we get him over to Middle school and teach him Mathematics, he would be able to grasp the same and perform Mathematical operations in due time. The observation is, why is that a man who has grown to live in jungle all his life has the hidden potential to perform Mathematical calculation when trained. The expectation would be, A Brain of a tribe who has lived in jungle for all his life would require several mutations before he acquires the ability to perform mathematics. But, In this case, The brain is capable of performing the work but due to the situation/surrounding, the man has never found the need to explore it. So, Man and his abilities are not necessarily limited by his environment. This is what is called the "Potential Intelligence". The best analogy I can think of is Latent Heat. It requires persistence, exploration and training to push and find the limits of our brain.

It is well known that left brain deals with Analytical data, language, semantics and essentially is the storehouse of accepted ideas. While Left brain has been sufficiently exploited, it is the right brain which is a little abstruse as it is associated with arts, creativity, imagination, psychedelic experiences. Let me try to explain this with a data flow. This is just said for visualizing the flow and does not necessarily conform to how the brain actually works.

Input is received by our sense organs say Eye, light falls on our retina, data taken through our optic nerves to the visual cortex associated with it.

There are multiple subsystems waiting to process that input and simultaneously signals coming in from multiple other input sources of the body.

The inputs are processed in parallel. Each sense organ's input and output acts as input and output for each other depending upon our neural circuitry.

While the right brain looks for deviation from known standard, left brain looks to identify, associate and process the input based on accepted standards.

Due to our past experiences, we are mostly conditioned to give a standard response.

But, if the right brain identifies that the input doesn't fit into the accepted standards known, then there is couple of to and fro dialogue that happens between two hemispheres, reasoning takes place. If the input presents convincing enough argument, the data in the "Known standards" is updated.

Mostly the reasoning that happens falls into this categories, Impossible and Improbable. Brain believes something is Impossible purely based on it's existing belief system, accepted standards and there is no second thought about the fact when it is classified Impossible. The brain will completely discard the occurrence. If from the known data, if an event/input is even slightly probable, brain considers and evaluates the possibility of one such event and records the frequency with which such and such input can occur.

It is very very important here to understand that if the result of the reasoning results in disturbing the fundamental structure of the beliefs and known standards, the response generated is either Denial or Neglect. Disturbing the beliefs and Known standards will deeply affect the ego and identity of the self. So, Brain has ingrained consciousness of the self and ego and makes sure that those are not hurt, disturbed or questioned, and so that the body as a whole can continue with it's work of sustaining life. Desires and Goals are just by-products. Just like Carrot before the horse to keep it running.

After processing the input, Appropriate response is generated and signals are sent to various regions on the brain to send motor signals to corresponding subsystems of the body. In addition to the motor signals, emotional response is also generated by Amygdala and the limbic system which plays a very crucial role in making emotionally effective regions. There is always a constant tug of war happening as to when to make an emotional decision and when to make a rational decision? Or how to make an emotional decision and rationalize it later. Refer The science behind emotional intelligence for more details.

So, at the end the decision is made, signals sent out and systems is either processing parallel inputs or set ready for the next processing.

Well, the actual truth is Brain is infinitely more dynamic than what I have tried to explain above. So why should Brain be conscious to retain the identity and preserve one's ego in this entire processing ? Why would the body function effectively only in such case? Is there a closely guarded Secret?

Before that, Will a group of employees respect and obey his manager who doesn't have self esteem ? The obvious answer is No. Such is the same case here in our body. The notion of respectable living attributed as Self Esteem stems from one's ego and identity. When one's ego or identity is lost, there is no way that the Decision made will exert the necessary command on one's body and there fore result in indecision or akinetic mutism.

It looked trivial to you when you read, your self esteem depends on your ego. But, here is my question? What if there are experiments which would result in experiences which will make you doubt that your body is limited to the attached body parts? To elaborate, what if you doubt that your self is not limited to your identity and ego as known to you and entire idea of limited self is a total illusion.

For example take emotional responses like Empathy, love etc. In a way, those emotions help you transcend the limitation of self and include, respect and treat others as you would treat yourself. Right from the touch, thoughts and action, you include and identify yourself with people whom you empathize with or in love with. It is not just an imagination originating because, when such transcendence happens, you are not necessarily making it a conscious act. It just happens as if the neural circuitry is hard-wired for that and everything set in motion and works in perfect harmony. There is no processing or rational debate while that happens and even when such inputs override the limited identity, our self esteem is not hurt.

So, it becomes important to just point out that there are two kinds of information identified. One is perceived, One is conceived. The information is perceived depending upon the extent to which we are conditioned and similarly information is conceived out of the conditioned perception. So, Perception and Conception of ideas happen dynamically and affect each other functioning in equilibrium.

How we perceive and What we conceive and What we perceive and How we conceive can all be limited by our conditioning. But it is still possible to conduct objective experiments to continuously improve our perception and conception of ideas.

Is it possible to function effectively after shedding ego and identity to include the entire world and all the living and non-living? The answer is Yes. Absolutely Yes. But it requires enormous penance and transcendental wisdom to raise to those levels by exploring the potential intelligence left locked with in us.

There are maps in the brain's surface which sends motor signals to various subsystems of our body. It is that which limits the identity to our body parts and subsystems. So, It is the limited information available in our Brain Map that limits our identity and is a trick played on us in such a fashion that the system functions correctly as a single entity. But that does not in any way limit our true nature or real identity to ourselves and our body only. Deep seated emotions and thoughts stand as testimony to negate this illusion of self.

The most curious of all is, while the brain can work with questions starting with "What" and "How" but could only imagine reasons for questions starting with "Why"? The dots can only be connected backwards. True, but are the dots meant to be connected and is that the only way that the dots can be connected is way beyond our ability to answer. The Brain connects the dots to feel coherent. Again, this has got to do with continuity. The same way vision works. Independent images are processed at a frame rate for the visual to make sense to the subsystems. The subjective experience of being/living is unique and can't be generalized. Only by deeply involved emotions of love, compassion or religion can the brain be trained to overcome the illusion of limited self and accept the reality of its universality and infinite nature.

We can gather intelligence from our past experience but connecting the dots/solving the puzzle would happen only at the end of time especially if the puzzle is as big as the reason behind this cosmic creation. There is even a "Capgras' Syndrome" where the subject after a disturbing epilepsy or other issue starts attributing every event as one which has cosmic significance. It is certainly possible to attribute cause and effect in controlled environments and statistics and probability do come handy here to ascertain and evaluate. Logic helps to some extent. Alas, there is a limit.

There goes the quote by Sherlock Homes,

"It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be truth"

Difference between Neurological and Psychological disorders:

Freud would generally attribute every disorder to suppressed emotional reasons whereas Jung would attribute it to the spiritual quest. Sexuality and Spirituality lead to unnatural social and personal behavior when suppressed or when notions are improperly developed. While there is agreement there in the possibility of psychological delusional disorders and other tricks played by our conscious, subconscious and unconscious on us, there is also certainly a scope for Neurological disorders.

However poorly understood our brain may be, if there are inbuilt damage or faulty wiring as a result of terrible accident, it can certainly result in delusions, irrational behavior, uncontrollable actions and thoughts. Especially, if the connections between the prefontal cortex and anterior lobe of the brain which acts as the transmitter of signals, when impaired may result in total withdrawal of social life in the subjects. Such a procedure was advocated for terminal psychological illness in Early twentieth century. The process was called lobotomy. Though effective, it's side effects are ethically unacceptable under prevailing standards or Human Society.

But, there are certain other therapies that are less pervasive that can be evolved when the neural circuitry is understood and disorders arising out of imperfect perception due to this limitation is properly diagnosed. The subjects who suffer such delusions due to neurological defects are not consciously cooking up images or facts but they tend to perceive such and such inputs as a result of impaired wiring inside and continue to believe and respond to such signals. Various Cases have been discussed in various text books on psychology to stand as a proof.

Next Post:

The Myth and the Mystical

Understanding "Understanding" - The Phantoms in the Brain

2011-11-10T04:38:00.000-08:00

I have always been fascinated by the idea of "Self" and "Consciousness" right since my school days. I even delved deeper and deeper and totally lost myself in the search during my college days. There are times, when my friends thought that I have lost "It" but nevertheless I knew I was dragged into a domain which very few dared to bother about. Anyhow, I compromised some grades in the courses designed for earning a Socially acceptable Engineering Degree and I presented a paper in Philosophy in my fourth year about my thought experiments about relevance of Space and Time on our thought and evolution. I called it "The U-Curve Crazy Theory". I even got it reviewed by my Quantum Mechanics and Physics professor and to my surprise they were first few people who didn't think that the idea and thoughts were insane. At that moment I thought it was the end of my inquiry which later turned out was just the beginning. And the biggest of all surprises is that, I cleared my Engineering Degree in First class. Had I passed in distinction, I would have really gone insane. It would violate the theory of karma by all possible means. Another point is I didn't win in the paper presentation contest.

That said, let me start by invoking the "Spell of Curiosity" to take you further into my observations and understanding however limited it is. We all know that we believe in our identity and understand ourselves as a single entity of complexly fit organs each working with each other to serve the purpose of sustaining life in the body. The first and foremost striking question is "Why should life be sustained?" May be there is a purpose or a motive. If so, what is that? Is it discernible? If yes, is it achievable? If yes, Is the purpose same for every one? If yes, why is the purpose same for everyone where each one of us is fundamentally different and unique in some aspect? Why is that all these questions bother me? Why do I want to understand and know things around me? Above all, can I really find answers to these questions? Do I have the ability to solve the puzzle?

All these Questions remind me of a quote by St.Augustine.

God created Heaven and Hell and assigned Hell to those who asked questions starting with "Why".

To start understanding, we must understand understanding and tool that helps us understand. We are unfortunately as effective only as the tool and efficient as much as we can push the tool to that extent that we are allowed to discover the objective truth as is. The tool here happens to be our brain, densely clustered matter which happens to take us through this delightfully diverse streams of life and death.

"Why is thought, being a secretion of the brain, more wonderful than gravity, a property of matter?" - Charles Darwin

We have heard a lot about Mind-Body problem, Mind over Matter etc. It will be impossible for me to address all of that in detail but I shall touch upon them to take necessary references to drive the point that it is possible to understand and comprehend the world around us.

My understanding however limited comes by reading a bunch of books on Psychology and Philosophy and by innumerable discussions I have had with my younger brother. In addition to that, Living Life teaches a lot of things in a much more subtle fashion. But one thing for sure, none of my thoughts come from classroom teaching. I swear.

Particularly, Dr.V.S.Ramachandran Sir's book, Phantoms in the Brain provided the much needed clues for the missing pieces of the puzzle I was working on. Now that, when I think that the puzzle is complete, All I realize is, the Puzzle will never be complete until the end of time!!!

Canst thou not minister to a mind diseased,

Pluck from the memory a rooted sorrow,

Raze out the written troubles of the brain,

And with some sweet oblivious antidote,

Cleanse the stuffed bosom of that perilous stuff,

Which Weighs upon the heart?

- Will Shakespeare

- Act 5, Scene 3, Macbeth

Don't we all wish for that perilous sorrow lurking in the dark corner of our hearts to be wiped out? So did Shakespeare. The fear that comes with the uncertainty and that moment of lonely feeling descending on to our hearts and heads, corrupting our nerves, killing life in every inch of our body and ruining our minds like a fort crumbling down to earth. We fall down and perish and think it is all done and yet the pain doesn't cease. It continues to torment, strips us of our identity and ego, making us worthless of living and denying the life's share which everybody deserves. Is it done yet?

What i've felt

What i've known

Never shined through in what i've shown

Never be

Never see

Won't see what might have been

What i've felt

What i've known

Never shined through in what i've shown

Never free

Never me

So i dub thee UNFORGIVEN

- Metallica, From the song UNFORGIVEN

And in such hapless state of Mind, does the man think, "Am I free?" We all search for meaning in life, consistency, Peace and Silence deep within. Above all try hard to discover our purpose and relish in achieving the same. We strive hard to find ourselves a place to live, feed, grow, produce etc. We all seek security to function effectively. No denying here.

But How much are we in control ? If we are in total control, why are we searching for Security in the first place? Does partial control makes sense? Has this puzzle has already been solved and are we trying to reinvent the wheel? Let us start by understanding the structure of the brain. Let's explore the phantoms in the brain in the following sections.

Next Posts:
The How and What of Brain

Interview Insomnia

2011-11-03T04:14:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

Okay. This isn't about me. I meant to say that it isn't only about me. A general encounter that happens to most of the people. It is safe to start by assuming that I am the average guy out there looking for a decent job with a good pay preferably with average looking female species or at the least good people with some wit and humor. If it is too much to ask, then what do I tell about the interviews conducted?

I must confess that I did go to highly technical school for my under graduation but that did little to really improve my looks. Some people say that I have that sullen look, with my swollen reddish eyes due to incessantly watching movies of all genres ranging from Silence to Violence that makes me look Woody-Allen-like-neurotic but I must say looks are the last thing I bother about in this universe.

I resigned from my job few months back and I say that with a big sigh. I ain't sure if that sigh is one of relief or of pain. For all the poor qualifications of not doing any thing right in my life, I have been searching for another job in vain. Not that I am totally worthless but I sort of get that tiring depressing feel for I am almost in the fag end of giving up the hope on finding a job where my heart is. There can be a thousand crappy reasons for not being able to find one opportunity to put my efforts from the heart, but I think all those reasons will vanish in to thin air when I do find one.

Damn those interviews and It really gets me on my nerves when they are conducted as if they are going to employ me as a sole in charge of sending the first man to Andromeda. I am not underestimating all the good work that I have done nor the companies that have achieved. I am not here to condemn anything but just that my only fundamental request is "For God's sake, ask relevant questions!!".

For Example:
Q: Tell me about Yourself:
A: Okay. I am Karthick.

Interviewer interrupts to remind me that it is already there in the Resume. Though that makes sense, I decide to start differently.

A: I am Karthick Hariharan, Son of Harihara subramanian, grand son of Surya Narayanan, coming from 8° 58' N, 77° 21' E...

Interviewer is pissed off for obvious reasons and I remind him that those details aren't there in the Resume.

Q: What is your uniqueness?
A: Absolutely nothing. I am just a common, normal, ordinary, down to earth person. I eat, drink and excrete and work for survival like every other creature on planet earth.

I ain't an antique selling itself. Some MBA and aspiring MBAs would argue it is all about being right place at the right time, selling yourself right and all that crap but if the entire work world has been reduced to such prostitution, I would rather refrain myself from any thing defined as such work.

Q: Tell 3 Qualities that define you:
For such questions, I throw away any kind of expression in my face and with Stoic face with a little sattire, look into their eyes with the confidence limits as high as Jack Nickelson in "One's fly over cuckoo's nest"...
A: I am technically infinite [ with a pause, after looking at the skies and in a strongly rustic mystical voice]..Aham Brahmasmi.....

By this time, interviewers are dead scared and they realize that they have encountered not just a King Kong but one with the heart of Godzilla. Interviewers some how gather courage to ask me the next question.

Q: Where do you think you would be 5 years down the line?

They must be joking really. I intend to answer them honestly from the bottom of my heart. I don't understand this. If I say, I will be the man to crack the fundamental theory of everything that scientists are burning their grey cells over, are these people going to help me do it? I really don't understand. Anyhow, here goes my answer,

A: Honestly, I don't know. I don't know if I will reach home safely after today's work. Honestly, when I stepped into my college for the first time, I thought I must make a mark in the gold medal winners board. Looking back, I wonder how I cleared through my courses with out backlog. Trust me, I applied to this job not because of what I wanted to be something after 5 years, but because of what I can do now. But I am pretty sure, I will be something by then.

Q: What is that you are passionate about in this job?
A: Truly, I am dispassionate towards this job. I can see this job objectively and I do not have a personal agenda. And this dispassion is not out of frustration but out of discrimination. I put my heart 100% without any affiliations or distractions.

The point to be noted here, most of the people do not understand that passion is something that arises out of deep sorrow or pain. Passion is an outcome of an excessively vacillated mind. And half the folks generally stereotyped by words like passion, goals, achievement and do not understand or even do not try to understand that dispassion is not disinterestedness.

Not to say, Puzzles lifted from books are the standard first round to filter out intelligent people from the list. The reason why I say this is, My friend who answered all his questions right was omitted for personal interview and I who had answered by playing "Inky Pinky Ponky" was selected. I made sure even if I die of hunger, I will not join this firm for sure that I know they will select me for my sheer intellectual genius displayed in the Puzzle round. I am pretty sure that I shall deny if such an opportunity falls in place.

All said, all those questions are really valid but just that I didn't feel like answering them right. It has got nothing to do with my past experiences but just that the nature of interviews and quality of work doesn't go hand in hand. It will be really cool, if the companies for 75% of their work, accept that they look for average people with average skill set, who would not think twice before they execute their Manager's command. I must say I am extremely thankful to god for having worked in one of the finest places on planet earth before but when I come out of that comfort zone to see what the world is, I am shocked to see the stupidity and nonsense filled around.

Feel free to discard all this rant. I basically screwed up the interview that I had few hours back.I have boarded the bus back to my home.Only Music player seems to understand my mind by playing the right play list. I text a friend and there is no reply. It looks as if some one has stolen away god's remote control. Nothing seems to be going right.

What is that they want? To make one tell, they are the next Steve jobs. For a philosopher of my own kind, the acknowledgement that "I don't know" is the best place to start. When I go back, I feel scared to login to my chat because I don't know what to answer if some one asks me what have I done with my interview. At the least I will check my daily fortune to cross check with the sum total of the day's experience.

This is just a rant. Forget that I said all this.

A Simple lesson

2011-10-11T02:56:00.000-07:00

I was reading on a book called "Yet another book on Vedanta". A pretty simple read which had a very interesting story about an incident involving Adi Shankara which was simple yet striking. Here goes the story:

Adi Shankara has said that "Sarvam Brahmam Jagat Mithya". All this world is maya and only truth in Brahmam.

Once Adi Shankara and his followers were crossing a dense jungle. All of a sudden, a mad elephant came running towards them and Adi Shankara was the first person to run ahead and climb up a tall tree to safeguard himself.

After the elephant was gone, the perplexed followers asked their Guru, "Guru, You have said that all the world is an illusion. Yet, why did you run to safeguard yourself from an illusion called elephant".

Shankara replied wittily to his followers, "While you applied that world is an illusion to the elephant that came running, why did you fail to see my running as an illusion too.?"

A striking reply indeed. That pretty much outlines, that how we apply our already limited logic to situations partially and the story also stresses the importance to comprehend things by applying logic and learning to the bigger, total picture. And of course, obviously that if an elephant came running towards, run away.

Being Siva

2011-09-13T01:34:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

Ayn R was waiting to interview me. She had come a long way all along from University of California, Berkeley. I looked at her through my window. She was restlessly waiting in the lobby of my asylum.An asylum for the free souls that were forced into live in their own worlds. Their worlds are unique unlike the world for the sane. They are free with "Insanity" labelled in their heads. Nobody can deny their reality for it is true to them. Who are we, mere shallow mortals to destroy them? Nature knows best. The best treatment that can be given to them is to allow them to live with the nature and let nature talk with them. They recuperate by the sheer magic of the quality of life gifted by nature, as is.

I started my career as an ambitious neurologist bursting with passion to make a difference in the field. The initial success helped me push my limits and gave me the freedom to pursue long suppressed questions lingering in the dark corners of my heart. Looking back, I realize it was an audacious step. I am not an adventurer but I found the direction and motivation springing up in me like a tree that grows of a seed. I had no option but to follow. I was lucky enough to have a supporting wife. We were hardly in our mid 30s and had a long way to go.

After a few years of aimless wandering, the truth took some mercy on me to reveal herself. The questions stopped, the doubts vanished, the passion forgotten, the pain subdued and truth answered. It was simple, clear and pristine. The passion to succeed in career has been replaced with the imperative to serve the society with the intelligence that nature has bestowed upon me. I feel highly responsible more than ever to stand up to the challenge. It is in this context, Ayn R had come over to interview me about how I went about setting up a lunatic asylum in harmony with nature to bring the lost souls back in to the acceptable world of ours. Trust me, they are better lost.

I walked over to the lobby and welcomed Ayn. Ayn, should be in her mid 20s, was dressed in her casual jeans and T-shirt. She looked simple, honest and her eyes spoke of volumes about her fascination for the subject. I took her around the campus spread around 10 acres of grass land, huts, open air theaters, water falls, gallery, streams etc. She thoroughly enjoyed. For a while, she stood motionless to enjoy the group of people fishing in the stream. A couple of pictures were taken to record her memories.

Ayn R: Sir..

Me: You can call me JK.

Ayn R: J Krishnamurti ??

JK: Nope. J Karthik. J as in Jayaram.

She went about asking couple of rudimentary questions about my journey, my decisions, lessons learnt, success and failures, opportunities and scope of such an institution.

Ayn R: So, how did you plan to execute your idea?

JK: The idea was never mine and the plan, never planned. Beyond a point, it just fell in place. Here I am, talking to you. Nothing more.

Ayn R: What was your fundamental philosophy while all this unplanned plan that got executed?

JK: You are shrewd, aren't you? I think, all the blame goes to Schopenhauer, Voltaire and Spinoza. Especially when you read them with an open mind, they can bless you with Truth, Death and Insanity. If you are lucky enough, A little fame to last for couple of centuries! What ever I read or understood, I felt I knew that I no more fit into the fabric of mechanically orchestrated world. If at all there is one place, where sanity is not prescribed, it is an asylum. Rather than live in asylum of some one else, I preferred to live in my own.

Ayn R: In your own words, you were made to prefer your own asylum.

JK: [ Laughing out Loud ] True, True, True. Indeed. You are right to point out.

Ayn R: So, what is that truth that descended on to you?

JK: Hmm. Tough question. Truth as such, doesn't hurt. Distorted truth might hurt. My mere attempt to explain, will distort it. It is better unsaid. You will pardon me for it. Won't you?

Ayn R: [Laughing out] So, There are two possibilities. There is no such truth or it is beyond our comprehension.

JK: Hmm. Better. I will take you to an inmate who can give you the answers. He claims himself to be a Time Traveler and escapes every time when we assemble inmates for a bath. We call him Agathiyan.

Ayn R: The great Vedic Seer ?

JK: Indeed.

Agathiyan is completely imbibed in his meditation. Seated in a stone near a Lord Nataraja statue, with his eyes half open, with a smile expressing infinity. It is difficult to understand what that means, but if at all it should mean anything, the content must be profound.

Ayn R: So, How long has Agathiyan been here?

JK: It is funny but I will better let him talk to you.

Agathiyan: Hmm. Funny. Yes. I have always been here since my time. It is this JK who built his asylum around my place. He has been grateful by letting me stay with in his campus.

Ayn R: Oh! You speak English?

Agathiyan: Do I? Interesting. Otherwise, How would you understand about Being Siva?

Ayn R: Sorry.. What?

Agathiyan: Carry on. We will come to that later.

Ayn R: So, Why didn't you object while the asylum was built?

Agathiyan: Oh..That. I was traveling to Manasarovar and Mount Kailash. In the few weeks of my absence, JK went about building this. When I came back, I was surprised. In fact, JK was more surprised to find an unaccounted person in his asylum. Isn't JK?

Ayn R: Is it true JK?

JK: Not exactly. None of the local people know him. One day, he was at the front of my asylum, smeared with ash, calling me to come out. He commanded that he be let in for his native place is with in the asylum. From then on, he has been here.

Agathiyan: But, that doesn't deny my statement. I belong here. Right here, besides this Lord Nataraja. [ Pointing to the 6 feet Lord Nataraja Statue beside him ]

Ayn R: Indeed perplexing. How do you travel that far ?

Agathiyan: I am ported in time through worm holes. My mass becomes energy and after the travel is done, Energy again manifests as mass. The travel just happens. All I am left with, is the memory of my travel and I do not know how and when it happens.

Ayn R: Interesting that you are so proficient in contemporary scientific terms. But that doesn't convince me.

Agathiyan: Remember dear, It is not a prerequisite for my time travel?

Ayn R: What?

Agathiyan: That you should be convinced of such a possibility is not a prerequisite for my time travel. Got it?

Ayn R: Hmm. So what is the significance of this Nataraja Statue that you have here?

Agathiyan: Right. It took you so long to arrive at this question. Okay. In your scientific terms, this statue is a snapshot of universe, a frozen moment of this eternally moving universe.

Ayn R: Sorry, I can't get it. OHT! Over Head Transmissions..

Agathiyan: Tell me, what do you observe in the statue?

Ayn R: Well. I observe a dancing Mystic.

Agathiyan: Good enough. Let me help you with more detail. The wavelets of hair represents air, and on one hand, He holds Fire, The holy Ganges on the head represents Water, The sound of drum represents the medium of air, the right foot on a human figure represents Earth. The five elements of life are in a complete cosmic harmony with cycles of protection and destruction.

Ayn R: Interesting. I also observe that the left foot is lifted up and the big toe is slightly raised as well. What does that signify?

Agathiyan: Bull's eye. Luckily we have the neurologist nearby to affirm with whatever I say. The raised left foot signifies the entry of life into the human body. In our Brain, there are maps for every organ of our body. Similarly for our organs of reproduction also, we have a region allocated in the frontal surface of our brain. Right next to that surface is the region assigned for our foot and especially the region for toe lies next to it. And more over, when different organs are formed in the fetus, toe gets separated from the lower abdomen region where organs of reproduction form. I have read all this in some books in JK's library.

Ayn R: So?

Agathiyan: So. The raised left toe is an indirect yet aesthetically right way to represent the creation of life.

Ayn R: Very Very interesting. But, What is the point to have it all carved in the statue?

Agathiyan: Oh. So that people like you can question it and people like me can answer it.

Ayn R: What am I to take from it?

Agathiyan: Take this. The highest evolution of mankind is merge into this divine consciousness of being Siva. Consciousness reflects content and forms the basis of our knowledge. When we see this statue, it is important to appreciate the dynamic balance of this universe and realize the balance of all the elements of life with in ourselves. The universe becomes us and us, the universe. There are no two different things. Everything merges to become one. And the outer circle encompassing the statue the boundary of space and time. The ultimate truth is realized when you transcend this boundary.

Ayn R: Profound. I feel I have already become half insane.

Agathiyan: So, I rightly belong here. I mean the asylum. Right?

JK: Or may be, the asylum rightly belongs to you ?

Agathiyan: [Laughing out Loud ]. Anyhow, It is bath time. Off you go.

I and Ayn turned around to check the time in the clock tower. As we turn back, Agathiyan was no more. He had disappeared yet again.

Ayn R: This is insane. Where is he?

JK: There are two possibilities. Either our minds are very weak to create this illusion of disappearance of Agathiyan based on the story he just told us or he is really traveling time. Either case, we have a long way to go before we really comprehend the true nature of universe.

I bade good bye to her. I don't think so she will ever come back here. If at all that happens, she wouldn't be sane.

The Creation of Woman

2011-08-29T21:10:00.000-07:00

I was reading Discovery of India by Pandit Nehruji. In the section that dealt with our tradition, myths and epics, the following quote was found about the creation of woman. The translated text originally appears in "The Digit of the Moon" which is a translation of Stories and accounts in Indian Mythology by F.W.Bain.

I was so drawn towards the richness of imagination and profound sense of beaming exuberance of life. In a way, it also deals with the surrender of Man. I can only stand and wonder the state of living then to imagine with out restraint and fear.

In the beginning, when Twashtri came to the creation of woman, he found that he had exhausted his materials in the making of man, and that no solid elements were left. In this dilemma, after profound meditation, he did as follows.

He took the rotundity of the moon, and the curves of creepers, and the clinging of tendrils, and the trembling of grass, and the slenderness of the reed, and the bloorn of flowers, and the lightness of Ieaves and the tapering of the elephant's trunk, and the glances of deer, and the clustering oik rows of bees, and the joyous gaiety of sunbeams, and the weeping of clouds, and the fickleness of the winds, and the timidity of the hare, and the vanity of the peacock, and the softness of the parrot's bosom, and the hardness of adamant, and the sweetness of honey, and the cruelty of the tiger, and the warm glow of fire, and the coldness of snow, and the chattering of jays, and the cooing of the Kokila, and the hypocrisy of the crane, and the fidelity of the chakrawaka ; and compounding all these together, he made woman, and gave her to man.

But after one week, man came to him, and said :

Lord, this creature that you have given me makes my life miserable. She chatters incessantly, and teases me beyond endurance, never leaving me alone : and she requires incessant attention, and takes all my time up, and cries about nothing, and is always idle ; and so I have come to give her back again,as I cannot live with her.

Twashtri said : Very well : and he took her back.

Then after another week, man came again to him, and said :

Lord, I find that my life is very lonely since I gave you back that creature. I remember how she used to dance and sing to me, and look at me out of the corner of her eye, and play with me, and cling to me; and her laughter was music, and she was beautiful to look at, and soft touch : so give her back to me again.

So Twashtri said : Very well and gave her back again.

Then "after only three days, man came back to him "again, and said :

Lord, I know not how it is; but after all, I have come to the conclusion that she is more of a trouble than a pleasure to me i so please take her back again.

But Twashtri said : Out on you ! Be off I I will have no more of this. You must manage her if you can.

Then man said : But I cannot live with her.

And Twashtri replied : Neither could you live without her. And he turned his back on man, and went on with his work.

Then man said : What is to be done ? for I cannot live either with or without her .

Note that Nehru was a careful writer. While he had mentioned the first part about the creation of woman, he has carefully avoided what followed in the book. Instinctively I was surprised to know what did man do with woman and stumbled on the rest of the story...

Reference: The Discovery of India by Pandit Nehru.

A Secret

2011-08-21T20:11:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

Surya and Rathi are having a good sip of flavored Assam tea in their balcony. They have come for a vacation to a far away country side in southern Tamil Nadu. A massive land mass of lavishly flamboyant greenery with the mountains shielding the rain bearing clouds close to its chest. All set for a good conversation and a wholeheartedly one.

Surya is deeply engrossed in his thoughts and is as well enjoying the pleasant weather and the tea well made by his wife Rathi.

Rathi: [Looking at Surya, Clears her throat] Excellent Tea isn't it?
Surya: Yes. Top class. [ replies with out looking at her ]

Rathi: So, What's special about this place? You told me you will tell me once we reach Courtallam.
Surya: [Not having listened to her, he questions back after a brief moment of silence] Sorry, what did you ask ?
Rathi: [Obviously frustrated with lack of concentration in Surya ] Well, I think some thing is eating your head. What is that you are thinking so deep?

Surya: [Laughing to himself] I must be a fool to waste a wonderfully set evening to think about a secret than to make it meaningful by spending it with a beautiful wife.
Rathi: [Laughing] So, at least you realize it. The night is always there for me to take over your foolishly useless thoughts on human society and political conditions but If I am not wrong, I did remember hear the word secret. And do you think you could escape with out telling me about that?

Surya: Did I?
Rathi: Of Course, Yes. What is that secret that is running in your head? Don't bore me by telling your tragic love past. If that is the case, I can tell you 100 such stories.
Surya: Woah! Woah! That's interesting. Well let me hear one from you...
Rathi: The Secret first.

Surya: A Wise saying to start with, "A Secret is what one says to other not to tell that to one another".
Rathi: Well, I can keep it up.
Surya: So did Parvathi... [ Laughing teasingly ]
Rathi: You mean Lord Siva and Parvathi, that Parvathi ? What did She do ?

Surya: Well..[sighs]That's how secret descended on me. She is the one responsible and in a way I must be extremely indebted to Her for it..
Rathi: Hmm..Interesting.
Surya: You would have heard of Siddhars, Ancient Indian Mystics. It is said that Lord Siva, the first of all yogis who merged with bliss passed on the secrets to his wife, Parvathi one pleasant day and later Goddess Parvathi passed on the secrets to Nandhi, the bull god who guards the entrance to their living place in Himalayas and from then on it was secretly spread to the deserving mystics after sufficient atonement is done for their earthly life in penance and meditation.
Rathi: Pretty interesting...So, why is that a secret if it is a global good?
Surya: Good question. The problem is that secret is beyond good and bad. Means, It depends on the person who handles and controls that. If you see, Ravana, the Lankan king who appears in Ramayana is a master as well but he put his mystical powers to failed cause.

Rathi:So, you mean I deserve hearing the secret.
Surya: The secret is public. Many of them witness it every day but just that they fail to acknowledge it. To be technical, it is out of frequency ranges of their perceptive cognitive abilities.
Rathi:[Laughingly] Go ahead GuruDeva. I am all yours.
Surya: So, what do you think about predetermined life time of living things?
Rathi: Well, that's is pretty much fate. Or Destiny so to say. A fixed number of days to live in planet earth.
Surya:Hmm...Have you heard that Sage Agasthiyar lived for 3000 years.
Rathi: Yes. But I tend to think that it is a difference in calculation methodologies or may be assuming that it is the total number of years he took after several births to attain bliss.

Surya: Very good guesses. So, you do accept it is quite possible. Let me throw yet another possibility. What if the life time is calculated by the number of breaths we breathe. For example, Person A is destined to breathe 3 lakh crores of inhalation and exhalation.
Rathi: Very interesting. So essentially are you saying that Sage Agasthiyar had breath control practices to prolong his life time? But, why would he prolong his life time? An average life time of 60 years is itself is miserable with all the suffering.
Surya:Now, that is an excellent question. Why would one prolong his life time by controlling his breath? More over, this breath control is called Pranayama. There are three important segments in the practice. It is called pooragam, kumbakam and rechagam. There are two methodologies involved[practicing all three segments or just the first and last] and it must be properly taught under auspices of a guru. If the control is improperly performed, it will lead to complications in health of mind and body.
Rathi: Hope you are not advocating me to join some of the courses that every other institution is advertising now?

Surya: That will be the last thing I will tell you. I would best try to avoid institutions of any kind. Luckily you have got me. For others, it is best when they learn from their parents or guru with whom they can share their experiences.
Rathi: That is fine. So, why would Sage Agasthiyar prolong his lifetime?
Surya: To allow divinity to descend into the self to transcend this gross physical body into a body of love and grace and then leave the physical body with out a trace.
Rathi: OHT. That explanation was certainly a over head transmission.
Surya: People tend to think that complete devotion and surrender to an independent all powerful god would help them attain bliss. But it is impossible to devote oneself with out understanding the nature of one's body. All the mystics that thrived in this blessed land insisted on one and only thing and that was to take very good care of your body. Body as a device is inevitable. That is why in Tamil, there are two different words to refer to the physical body. One is "Dheham" which indicates the growing phase of the body and the next is "Sareeram" which indicates the decaying phase of the body.
Rathi: I follow here. You mean the healthy body and mind ideology. Making the best use of the body and using energy to keep the body and mind in balance.

Surya: Quite. Quite. Energy centers of our body are called nadis. Ancient Yogis developed siddha medicine for various health issues just by analyzing the nadis. The dormant energy rises from mooladhara which is just below the plane of our life organs. The energy rises through eeda and pingala nadis. They are the left and right nadis around the back bone intersecting at multiple points which in turn again form the core energy centers. At the highest state, the energy rising through these nadis merges at Sushoomna which lies at the intersection between two eye brows.
Rathi: Wow. Good. By the way, how did they know that it is by the number of breaths that a life time is determined?
Surya: Elementary Mrs.Rathi. By Observation and practice. And don't expect a theorem and proof for it.
Rathi: [Smiling] Continue Please...

Surya:Yes. So, Each energy center is activated and when the energy raises through various energy centers, the body and mind starts resonating with the universal mind. There is harmony in thought and action. The origin of the thought in such a state is not from one's mind and hence relieves him of any guilt or responsibility. The call is transcendental.
Rathi: Excellent. I follow. If I observe more closely, Isn't the statue with two snakes coiled up together vertically in our temple signify this? And Also, outlining this gets us the shape of a Shiva Linga.

Surya:Exactly. Quite right. The seven energy centers are Mooladhara, Svadhishtana, Manipooragam, Anahatta, Vishudhi, Aangna, Sahasrara. While the first six can be consciously activated, Sahasrara is beyond the will and control of any one. It just happens.
Rathi: So, Siddhars were one who understood that it is important to turn the outwardly bursting mind inward and focus on raising the energy to a thoughtless state. For which the equipment has to be maintained perfectly. So did they take great care of food and health of their body and thereby aspiring to attain the highest state of existence.

Surya: Yes. Very true. They even moved from body to body to prolong their life with out losing out breath so that the divinity will descend on them totally. When the body has been maintained rightly and all energy centers activated, the divinity descends into the body. It is a mutual process. And when that happens, the normal physical body full of dross transforms into a one of love and of grace with a golden luster glowing like a sun.
Rathi: Very poetic and from the confidence with which you see me into the eye to tell this, makes me believe that it is quite possible.

Surya: [Laughing] Yes. Quite possible. Just that we are not fine enough to grasp the possibility of it.
Rathi: But, But, But, Why is that we don't witness any one in our life time? The Siddhars seem to be extra cosmic stuff. Why doesn't such an experience of meeting a Mystic occur to a common person.

Surya: Well, They are all around us. Just that we don't realize that. Truth is too much for the sane. Most of the enlightened people have completely got rid themselves of any little saneness left them. They are free from cosmic impulses. What can a society and it's laws impose on them? I can tell you a lot of examples. There are nomads in Tenkasi who live by the Siva temple, who just survive by drinking water from the flowing sewage. A doctor friend of mine have seen them take water from the waste channel and by the time, they drink, the water is crystal pure. Their body health is absolutely fit. Absolutely perfect than all of us who drink purified water.
Rathi: Goose flesh. Can't believe it but absolutely shocking..

Surya: Forget all that. Let me give you an example who was none other than our Sringeri Jagathguru Shri ChandraSekara Bharathi Swamigal. He was a jivan muktha and was a Tapasvi of the highest order. He used to behave like a kid or like a psychologically ill person but only knowledgeable souls knew what is that he was going through. If you take Seshadri Swamigal of Thiruvannamalai, he was also thought to be mentally ill. But, only after Sage Ramana told about Seshadri Swami's Tapas, the whole world got to know about them. The Acharyas and Gurus who are entrusted with the responsibility of guiding the people have to put up a mask that they are sane and sensible to requests and sufferings of the devotees. In reality, they are totally cut off from any kind of thought and exist as is. [Parabrahmam]. Each and every word is totally driven by nature. They would never say that it was them who said so and so rather it was Ishvara Chittam, The cosmic mind.
Rathi: Wow. Is it true for all gurus? There are so many of them nowadays.

Surya: Difficult question. I would safely say I don't know. I know for sure in my case and I believe it is improper to analyze that.
Rathi: Certainly not in the probing sense but just to know. And, Chandra Sekara Bharathi Swami was the one who went to take bath in Tunga and ..

Surya: Yes. People tend to mistake that he drowned but tell me what are the facts that prove some one has drowned.
Rathi: Body would have sunk in water and water would have inflated and permeated the body. There will be no breath.

Surya: Right. Facts say that doctors who checked him thinking he drowned were unable to find a single drop of river inside his body. And his body kept floating in the same place in Padmasa Yoga posture.
Rathi: My goodness. Chilling indeed. That too in such a furious river, the body kept floating just right there is next to impossible.

Surya: So, Mystics are all around us. Just that we have to open our eyes to witness the magic. It is here in courtallam that Maha Avatar Babaji is said to have been taught "Vashi" Yoga by Sage Agasthiyar after 48 days of severe penance. And it is generally said that TamilNadu has been the piece of land that never under water and so, it has the highest density of places with Siddhars.
Rathi: But if you see, there is always this observed positive bias towards Men. It seems mystics have mostly been Men. Mostly.

Surya: True. Hope the stereotypes out there don't call god chauvinistic.
Rathi: [ Laughing out Loud ] Wait. They would even call him blasphemous. Ironical isn't it? If you see the sloka in Bhaja Govindham Song written by Adi Sankara, at one point, He sings,

naariistanabhara naabhiideshaM
dRishhTvaa maagaamohaavesham.
etanmaaMsaavasaadi vikaaraM
manasi vichintaya vaaraM vaaram.

This translates into "Do not get drowned in delusion by going wild with passions and lust by seeing a woman’s navel and chest. These are nothing but a modification of flesh." So, essentially is this a kind of address only to Men. And or Women incapable of over coming desires ?

Surya: Illogical. The Saint who said "Sarvam Khalvidam Brahma" [ Every thing is brahman] wouldn't discriminate between men and women. There are few reasons which I think could be the fact behind very few Women who lead a saintly life.
Rathi: Go Ahead...

Surya: Before which, Women were not left to deal with spirituality all by themselves nor were misguided. In Ancient times, Sage Agasthiyar prescribed set of daily house hold chores such as Fetching water from the river, drawing symbols in front of the home, highest order of cleanliness at home and society with lot of yoga exercises intertwined in them. But, in the name of fighting for equality, Women now a days say, men must do their work. It is completely fine to share each other's work but the worst is when Women fight that they have the right to drink alcohol and copulate with multiple partners just because men do it.
Rathi: Sad but true. Men are wrong and Women fight to be equally wrong. Pathetic but such is the state of affairs.

Surya: Okay. Leaving that aside for the society to figure out, let me tell few reasons which I think could be facts behind very few women mystics.
Rathi: Yes. Go Ahead.

Surya: First and foremost, There is a periodical reversal of gender in women which has a strong influence over the state of their mind and health.
Rathi: What crap? Periodical reversal of gender? Are you referring to periods?

Surya: Yes. During periods, the female body ejects out and behaves like a body construct of men. There is a psychological imbalance due to it. Make clear that it doesn't make them weak but very difficult for them handle the reversal of gender over a few days in month. There is change in character and thought.
Rathi: Man, you must have been crazy to research all this. Any how, I want to hear further. So, Is that all a reason? That is why it is said that Avvaiyar, Tamil Mystic poet turned to her 50s directly from the age of 18.

Surya: More over, Societal construct is yet another reason. All Women were not educated. Most Women lacked sufficient exposure to scriptures to enlighten themselves on concepts of Brahman. More over, there was severe poverty which was questioning their survival. Existence first. Enlightenment comes only at a later stage.
Rathi: Quite agreeable.

Surya: Yes. And it is not to be understood wrongly that those mystics preached celibacy strictly. Even Lord Siva was married and had two kids. Even there is an account of Tamil Mystic named Kaduveli Siddhar, who had sex with a girl after the girl pleaded so much to court after seeing his form and glow.
Rathi: Crazy. But I follow. He has moved to the state that he would never want to get into it again. Being able to move on continuously with out longing for pleasure. That is certainly a blissful state.

Surya: And in addition, mystics do not deal with images. I know Rathi as of the last moment and with data points about Rathi in my memory and deal with her accordingly. While that knowledge is essential to survive, it is the same memory that causes pain and suffering at a later point in time.
Rathi: Very right. They just accept people as and how the moment offers them.

Surya: Exactly. With out any perspectives or subjective notions of the personality.
Rathi: Very difficult yet attainable. Like a child or like a mad man.

[ Both Laugh ]
Surya: At times, when I sit and meditate, Initially I see around me log floating around and seamlessly flowing river stream. And moments later, I see myself in the river swimming through it. And moments later that I realize...
Rathi: The observer is Observed. J Krishnamurti Sir's ideology

Surya: Exactly. Exactly. I do not escape to god or guru immediately rather I stand, hold the moment and observe myself. Look inward. You follow? My guru stands as a standing proof for this process.
Rathi: Yes. Quite. Quite.

Surya: Freedom, Real freedom from thoughts.
Rathi: And that doesn't mean you are devoid of thoughts but just that you are not responsible for it's origin.

Surya: That's right.
Rathi: A Secret indeed.

Surya: Considering all this points, Isn't Civilization and all this society a brutal lie?
Rathi: Absolutely.

[ A Brief moment of silence sweeps them both having discussed vast array of philosophical topics. Night has come to dazzle the viewers with her stars. ]

Surya: Look at the Stars, So beautiful aren't they ?
Rathi: [ Looks at Surya ] You must be hungry after a long lecture. I will get our dinner ready..

Rathi stands up and walks towards kitchen. Surya slowly slides his hand over the bluish green Saree of Rathi as she walks away.

The Divine Alchemy and the Profound Silence

2011-08-11T09:14:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

Crisis provides the much needed break for introspection. An universal fact indeed. Have you ever experienced that you have hit the bottom's bottom and there is nothing more to scratch below ? Perplexing yet a tranquil state of realization that there is nothing more to lose. It is comforting to come to terms with reality that we come into existence with this state of having nothing to lose but the body itself. I can only wonder and laugh at myself and my philosophical muses. I wonder if all this evolution is just an observation. A transient state of mind as situations and people around you change. A mere simple reflection of the change in society around you, change in attitude around you, a tragic result of imbalance around you. And it is at this juncture, the man is free from duty to serve the society and intensely research on self, morality, love, guilt, society and truth.

I wonder what is morality? I never could get a grasp of it. If it is different for different people, then why is it essential to uphold it? Funny, yet all those questions have been thronging my skull for quite some time. There is generally a reason behind such intense philosophical inquiries. I tend to think that those are imperatives ingrained by nature in the conscious mind of living organisms. A lion doesn't feel guilty for killing a calf as it is how it survives. So, does that mean that survival is a basic right and any act that justifies it can be moral ? In the same way, I also doubt if a lion would ever feel guilty for doing something. But, for sure I know that a man feels guilty when he goes against his moral imperatives. These moral imperatives are not subjective rather instinctive. Or, I doubt if all this moral imperatives are forced on the human mind by reading the myths and philosophies of the earlier generation. If that is so, what caused guilt in those people who wrote that myths and philosophies ?

Essentially, we choose a path of philosophy which we sympathize with, which we feel is appropriate and such a decision is made only with directions and reasons from your inner self and your own moral imperatives. Once, some of my classmates were asked to kneel down by my language teacher and she was asking for a wooden scale to teach them a rough lesson. Not that I hated my class mates, but I felt what they did was wrong and they deserved punishment. I brought two wooden scales as I knew that the scale is bound to break. It did. I was later made an outcast and always dealt with suspicion by my class mates. I felt a little awkward initially but slowly got accustomed to being alone. May be I deserved freedom, if I can say so. I didn't bother much about losing contact with my class mates but I did ponder over and over as to why I felt that they deserved punishment. I could never convince myself with my reason. I liked them all and I hoped they would be better after being strictly dealt with. I felt what I did was moral yet I was not at peace. Until I met a class mate years later and he confessed that the punishment helped him get over the habit of copying in exams. Though I felt peaceful listening to that, I could still never understand why is it wrong to copy in an exam? But, my imperatives do say that it is wrong. I came to conclude that such common moral imperatives become the law of the land though there is no strong reason for such directions originating from conscious mind, so to say.

Once, I was trekking in the western ghats. After a long and tiring trek, I reached the base where I decided to stay for a couple of days by the river side flowing downstream. There were few huts of farmers who were employed in agriculture in the land around. The sense of exploration derived out of trekking is inexplicable. It gives me a sense of freedom to see nature and beauty as is. The state of being absolutely free from thought and any kind of commitment in the country side relieves me of the enslaved civilized society in the cities. The mind opens up to observe, understand and accept things as they are.

As I was sitting by the river side, I saw the river raising from the mountains high above, flowing down making a path of its own, gracing the boundaries. While all man made entities act as a barrier to the flow of the river, it is the natural surroundings that allow it to be shaped and touched by the river as it wishes. I was sitting at the steps carefully constructed to help us take bath and fetch water in the river. While that is certainly comfortable, but the very steps act as a barrier to the river's will to shape it's boundaries. I sat there observing the drama. The way the waves in the river jumped over each other playfully, the birds flying here and there in search of food, Men who come and go, Logs that move around in the river's surface as if there is nothing more for it to do, Fishes jumping out of the water occasionally to grab it's food, mystical rainbows, little drops of rain with a gentle breeze and every thing that my human eye to could see, ears to hear and my mind could observe. I did not process the memory and explain the events rationally because for sure I know that this experience of stateless observation has a transcendental origin.

Until, I saw this brown coated white cat. As if a string is pulled, my brain dumped me with memories of days I spent with a terrific friend of mine. Indeed, terrific days with a terrific friend. What is that you call some one who could make every moment happening in your life? What is that you would say about the person if they bring back your dead spirit alive? A magician would be the apt word. The magic happened to me but for once, I was not fooled. The magic was real. The transformation was real. As I thought that all is well, one fine day, my friend disappeared leaving behind a little lovely brown coated white kitten to keep company with me. Nowhere to be found and no where I could go and find. Just like that vanished into thin air.

Just when I thought I have understood some one, I felt blown away by the unexpected disappearance. I did miss the company for a while but I kept on moving from one place to other to avoid those haunting of beautiful memories. The more I think about what could have gone wrong, I ended up realizing that it was the not the event that was haunting me but the memory that was. The memory of the past and possibility of failed relationship. The fear of uncertainty keeps us chasing all along. The pain of separation was real but in a way the suffering was absent. Rather I relished in profound silence contemplating on the pervading instability of human mind. It kept me occupied for a while.

Things change. Shit happens. Job happens too. I was in a blissful state of being unemployed for a while and I was convinced hard to take up a job that came my way. I did fare well decently. But, slowly success and money got to me. It was addictive. Society demands that. Like a monkey which obeys the doctor for an apple, I kept doing what my bosses wanted me to do. The repetition slowly was boring and felt there was something fundamentally wrong with my life. A sense of shallowness caught on. I had everything that a life would want but just that liveliness was missing. Action was missing. What is that I wanted to achieve in my life? I didn't know. I felt a little shaken. Honestly, I was not sure but I tend to think I felt guilty. Guilty of not utilizing my potential to achieve some thing.

I saw around me, a world buzzing with activity, with friends succeeding in every aspect of their lives and here I was losing my life to a lost cause and a cause that is still not clear to myself. Driven out of guilt, the restlessness was evidently seen in my every single action. No more I felt the need to appease my bosses for I first have to appease myself to continue with my life. It looks silly but yes, I was into a deeply driven crisis right from the bottom of my heart. I traveled a lot during my week ends and almost tried doing everything from smoking marijuana and dancing like Lord Shiva to Climbing hill tops and meditating on a peaceful way out. I continued with reckless travel and thought up until the point, I earned the courage to drop my existential knowledge obtained in so far by experience. Experience as it appears to be the summary of the past was no more useful for making decisions of the present. It gave me the courage to accept that there is indeed a problem and each and every problem is unique in its context. Every step forward from there was taken based on faith that having disconnected myself from the past, all I had to look forward was a life with full of hope and full of new options and dimensions.

Looking back, I envisioned myself to be a man of strong aspirations and perseverance. Though I continue to see myself the very same way now, I cannot help but notice that my direction and objectives have changed. The whole process of life, the divine alchemy has acted on me and indeed very well. Having gone through the ebbs and flows, I have emerged calmer and cleaner than before. At least, I hope so. Though I didn't intend to be this person, I have come to terms with the forces of nature and convinced myself to transform myself with divine alchemy and profound silence. Yes, It is with profound silence with in and with out that I seek to move forward. The journey continues as it should flow.

Emotional Short Circuit - Emotional demands of life

2011-07-19T23:28:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This is purely my subjective thoughts on Emotional intelligence and my personal understanding after reading few books on the same topic.This is the fourth post on the topic.

Previous Posts on Emotional Intelligence:-
Over emphasis on IQ
Need for Emotional Intelligence

The science behind emotional Intelligence

Emotional demands of Life:

At this point, I would like to point out a term called "Alexithymia". It is the inability to express feelings. To put it another way, limited by language and knowledge, it is the inability of the subject to express the emotions. It is not to be confused with inability to comprehend or respond to emotions such as arising out of lobotomy. But, This is a serious and common issue arising out of language limitation. The inability of the subject to express in words constitute this disorder. The same is applicable of highly ecstatic states of happiness and bliss as well.

Once the subject is able to express and communicate their psychological states, it becomes easier for the psychiatrist to address their issues. In the same way, it is equally important to understand the psychological states and scenarios for emotional coaching. The following list is very well known list of states and most of us have faced the same in our every day lives. Though it is nothing new, I have tried to classify various mind states to understand and deal appropriately in a particular situation. Few common scenarios are listed below:

Wallowing in Self Pity:
Group of people who think of themselves as losers and have lost hope about redemption assuming that they are always unfortunate.
Eg:

Need to be loved:
The overly narcissistic people who take too much care about the self in the fear of not being loved. They are obsessed with their manners and public image. Their stream of consciousness evident in their attitude and talks. Their behavior can be uniquely spotted especially in garrulous social gathering.

Need to share one's love:
Very romantic, poetic romantic fools who would not bother about being hurt. Most of them suffer from Alexithymia, i.e Inability to share one's emotion. They are also very dreamy and unrealistic with their beliefs and faith.

Dilemma arising out of Ethical stand points due to religious/social compulsions:
This is one topic which is slightly controversial. Religion has strong control over the ethical and moral directives of the associated individual. A deeply ritualistic person will find it very difficult to accept or even hear any opinions against his faith. At the same time, there are very sensitive issues which contradict with our believes when it comes to love, sex and food.

Unprecedented Anger:
This is the most perplexing state. Very interesting state to observe at the same moment. The reason for unprecedented anger is generally due to some irrelevant incident event in the past. It can either be an act of revenge or be an act of strong defense before certain truth about the past is dealt in detail.

Hyper tension arising out of over excitement or over reaction:
Most of the middle aged person, especially women go through this. This can be a very serious condition in Kids. This results usually due to a unhealthy family life. Bad childhood and Bad sex life can be reasons for the same. Though doctors claim medicinal treatments for the same, it is common sense that by working on a healthy work-life balance, this is quite an easily controlled state.

Possessiveness [ Material and Relationships ]
Aaah! Now, this is a beauty and the beast. The sense of unique possession tends to give a superior attitude to one's identify and self esteem. It is a dangerous bet. It is possible to over come material possessiveness to some extent but possessiveness in love and marriage relationships are very hard to overcome and slowly becomes like a poker game. It is either you lose big and win big. Either case, it is a zero sum game.

Forced Commitments:
Forced responsibilities are counter productive. It might be for the good of the subject but since anything forced on an individual hurts the ego and pride, the ego fights back with delinquency. There is a sense of dispassion that has resulted from hatred. Difficult state to come out of unless some thing miraculously happens to convince him of the subject's responsibilities forced on him.

False sense of Duty:
Dangerous mental state. Sociopaths and terrorists are mislead by this state of mind. They consciously or subconsciously have convinced themselves to take up the duty for which they were either deemed incapable or never chosen. With their subjective assumptions and ethical standpoints, they tend to execute their plans and actions. Highly suppressed personalities suffer from Split Personality disorders.

Social rejection:
This leads to clinical depression and in extreme cases leads to schizophrenia. Though it is debatable about alternate reality and its possibilities, this is a state that has resulted due to personality disorders. One needs to address this at the earliest to avoid becoming an island to oneself. Generally, People with out children and social failures in life, impose such sadomasochistic punishments to themselves and wallow in self pity.

Addiction:
This starts slow and slowly swallows the whole personality. Be it drugs, sex or any other habit. It evolves slowly from an occasional habit to an inevitable compulsion. The subject must redeem oneself by going through proper medical support. Family and Friends support is required at moderate levels for one to come out of any addiction. It ultimately boils down to the conviction of the subject.

Obsessive Compulsion:
This is something that defines the mannerisms of the subject. We tend to over do certain habits and the habits become a compulsion over a period of time. For example, some people keep on washing the hands as they have strong affinity towards cleanliness and negative affinity towards bacterial infections.

Egotist and Superiority complex
Control freaks and Micromanagement folks are egotist and have high orders of superiority complex. Very painful to deal with them. Better stay away. You might learn some business from them but never be happy. You would have to pawn your self esteem and be ready to appease them at any cost.

Glib liar:
Small time cheats have this funny problem. They get caught by their own lies. It is a commonly observed problem. Certain people lie for no reason. You can spot this by their failure to make proper eye contact or tangential responses. Over a period of time, the subjects develop good abilities to lie convincingly. It is fun at times to observe and on the other side, it is a pain if you are the person who is on cheated side.

Zelig, the Human Chameleon
Attributed to Woody Allen. Highly Complex issue. I really pity the subject's inability to express oneself freely. Fearing Social rejection, the subject camouflages himself with false identities to mingle with groups. One tries to readjust oneself according the situations around what so ever it be, just to gain the group's acceptance.

Very sensitive issue to deal with. No amount of medical treatment can really cure this is my personal opinion. It has to happen to the subject that it is okay to be oneself and be accepted by a few people than be popularly un-self and be accepted by a wide community. This realization can happen only when directives come from trusted relationships.

Procrastination and indecisiveness
Now, this is a fantastic teenage/adolescence problem. Lack of clarity, Direction and lack of independence forces the subject to procrastinate the tasks at hand. The lazy attitude can be result of lack of motivation. It can seriously impede the subject from realizing their full potential.

Dreamer:
Ever dreamy and romantic optimistic individual is the apt example. While it is excellent to be buoyant about one's positive attitude, at times, they tend to overlook the complexity of the problems. They even grow to the extent to use their dreams as an escape route to move out of their problems. They set very high goals and standards and tend to pursue them rigorously if they have good enough conviction and perseverance.

Dispassionate
Saintly and stoic. They are less moved by material objectives. They operate out of strong gut instincts only. They are difficult to understand and their actions might not make sense and it might also appear irrational. They have strong opinions and are deeply rooted in their philosophies. They tend to avoid arguments and generally prefer to live alone.

Iconoclastic Free Souls:

Sneer at tradition. At times, Adolescent and Middle aged men at times use this attitude to disavow their religious and traditional responsibilities. They try to free themselves of associating themselves with a set of practices. They do not like the idea of getting institutionalized. They roam free and live a minimal life style. They are generally quoted as bad examples in the society.

Skeptic:
The ever pessimistic, doubtful personality. Always good at pointing out the negatives. They earn their reputation for being a strong critic by playing Devil's Advocate. Certain talented people with good communication skills can make best use of this skeptic nature to scrutinize people and policies.

Sensitive:
Now, this is the "Touch me not" category. Highly sensitive and overtly reactive. The personality can also be strong introvert in which case that their true emotions are forcefully hidden due to fear of being abused or teased in public. They need to strengthen themselves by learning to accept their positives and negatives. Change in attitude and perspectives are required to handle this personality.

Indian myths tend to offer a wide range of characters and problem scenarios thereby putting the subject/hero through various situations to explain ethical standpoints and Emotional coaching. After several thousand years, Science confirms the same. Especially, in order to treat Post traumatic stress disorders, the subject can be relieved from pain by helping him narrate the experiences as a story to similar group.

It is here I would like to point out two important terms. Curing and Healing are two different words. While our Medicines and Diagnosis can cure lot of symptoms and diseases, it is the human touch and emotional empathy that heals a patient's physical and emotional stress.

How to tackle and improve Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional Coaching has to start right from school days.

For the welfare of Society and Children, States must focus on Healthy Family Life. If needed arrange counseling for Parents who are addicted, social failures or planning for divorce.

Patience is the key to success. Setting realistic goals and giving the right encouragement and support to help kids achieve their dreams can help them lead a more emotionally balanced life.

We are what we eat. Vegetarian diet is strongly advised. Health supplements and nourishment at the right times help kids improve their health and therefore a better mind state. Millennium development goals must aggressively target Poverty eradication to provide necessary means to survive.

Schooling Years forms the bedrock of subject's personality. Character, Virtue, Morality, forms the crux of the individual. Parents must develop a good level of equilibrium where the kid can voluntarily share their personal woes to them and should be willingly open to discuss their social problems.

Spiritual Strength must also be strongly recommended from childhood and must be taught in a convincing manner. Instead of forcing the rituals or prayers, if the proper reason and sound logic behind the same is explained with love and care, it will naturally help the subject effectively use spirituality for handling ethical issues in life.

A Calm mind is the most powerful one. Emotional Intelligence helps one achieve that calmness. An emotionally intelligent person derives immense strength from the support he gets from his friends and colleagues. The quality of life improves with improved emotional intelligence.

I would like to conclude with Aristotle's Quote on Anger.

"Anybody can become angry - that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way - that is not within everybody's power and is not easy."

Let's strive for that fine balance. Hope the article was useful. The topic is very intense and I have just outlined some fundamentals. For Detailed study, it requires dedicated study.

References:
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goldman

Why so stupid the world has never really learned to think? by Edward Bono

Emotional Short Circuit - The science behind emotional Intelligence

2011-07-19T23:18:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This is purely my subjective thoughts on Emotional intelligence and my personal understanding after reading few books on the same topic.This is the third post on the topic.

Previous Posts on Emotional Intelligence:-
Over emphasis on IQ
Need for Emotional Intelligence

The Science behind Emotional Intelligence:
How do we achieve it? Let's look a little into the science behind emotions. In the history of evolution of multi-cellular organisms, the development of neural network plays a key role. Life depends on the basic necessity of survival. Survival for what so ever unknown reasons seem to be the only logical conclusion for life to evolve. At least that is the only reason that has been accepted by science in so far.

In that context, the primordial organisms evolved from simple few-celled parasitic creatures to sophisticated systems to survive better in the ever challenging nature. Every moment of their life or death was directly resulting from their ability to survive. Decision making systems became invincible for their survival. Specialized organs slowly developed as a part of the multi-celled organisms. Fundamentally before even development of specialized systems for different life activities, the emotional short circuit in the skull formed the supreme decision making switch.

The highly networked neural systems were controlled by the signals from the emotional short circuit. The emotional short circuit is called "Amygdala". An apt example would be, Say, let's take a snake which has identified a potential threat. Depending on the level of threat received, the Amygdala of it's brain acts as an impulsive switch to make it's decision to spit it's poison or flee from the location. If it identifies the threat as a prey, the snake would take to fight or if it senses danger, it flees the situation. Essentially, the short circuit is binary. It is either fight of flee.

The important point to note is, the decision is completely based on the sensory input. There is no rational processing of the sensory input in lower animals. Where as, in the terrestrial animals and other evolved creatures, the development of neo-cortex section of the brain aides in the rational analysis of the input before the decision is made. The neo-cortex region acts as a layer over and above the amygdala and actively controls decision making.

Essentially, Rational decisions are made by the neocortex regions of the brain whereas emotional decisions are made by the amygdala. That is why, emotional decisions are generally considered irrational and most of the rational decisions need not necessarily make you happy. The decision dilemma between the heart and the head is a much known issue from pre-historic times.

The significance of this post is point out that if there is an effective balance and better understanding of your identity/persona, then it will help one behave and respond appropriately and therefore make better decision for him and the society. It is therefore important to understand when the brain behaves rationally and when the signals are triggered by the emotional short circuit. It should not be misunderstood that emotional short circuit should be mastered and suppressed. Rather, one should develop the sixth sense to know from experience when to make a rational decision and when to make an emotional decision.

Unfortunately, Emotional coaching can't be taught as a crash course or if it is taught some where it must be a fake course! It requires effective understanding of emotional requirements of the individual, society and nation as a whole. Fundamentally, the change must happen from with in to live for mutual support. Attitude must be redefined. The efforts must start at a very early age right from their baby days in the family. Family happens to be the pin-point from where the kid learns 90% of emotional life. It is from the rest of the world that the kid learns the 10% of survival. Numbers and percentages have been approximately quoted to indicate the significance of healthy childhood in a family environment.

Ultimately, the organism left to survive in a society learns to survive one way or the other way. But to succeed with phenomenal success, it is very essential to master the IQ and EQ. A careful combination and tactful application of them at the right place at the right time takes a person to high enviable positions of control and power. To use their skills of IQ and EQ for a peaceful world is left to the moral standards of the respective person.

Life with it's vast treasure house of experiences is an ever willing teacher to help you make decisions about making decisions. When does a short circuit occur? When the inputs over throw the rationally networked circuitry. Same is the logical scenario of short circuit in the brains. When the emotional input from the senses crosses a threshold, the emotional short circuit, amygdala takes over the cockpit and throws back a binary response. It is either fight or flee. It is either make or break. What is that threshold? Well, that depends on one's personality. It can not be rated or given a number as it is a symbolic code only understood by oneself.

The truth is we all pretend that we do not know ourselves well and hence we are not able to make better decisions for ourselves. But the truth is, even when you go in search of solution to a psychiatrist, the object who is used to understand the subject is yourself. i.e. You yourself are being used to treat you. The fundamental basic requirement to understand yourself is to talk about yourself. Isn't that you are made to do as you go to meet a psychiatrist?

Precisely, The memory helps you understand the positive and negative sides of your character. The problem can be solved once the problem statement becomes clear. The candid talks with a psychiatrist or any other person on whom you have developed trust help you understand the positive and negatives of your persona. Now, you automatically realize the reason behind the rationality or irrationality of your decisions.

While, Understanding self is just one side of the coin, the same theories can be generally applied to the emotional demands and requirements of the society as well. Of course there are special cases, It is good enough to start with applying the emotional demands of the self to others and treating others with the same amount of respect and dignity as you would for your emotional demands.

Trivia about Decision making with your heart:

Vagus nerve is the nerve that runs from bottom end of the brain [near Amygdala] to the cardiovascular sections of the body. The signals via this nerve slows down the pace of the heart and therefore has the ability to control the functioning of the heart. In the case of emotional decisions, This nerve helps soothe the heart beat and hence there fore one feels good at heart when an emotional decision is made.You feel strongly right when an emotional decision is made for the same reasons.

Only when thought retrospectively, you get to know if the emotional decision was right or wrong.

Consecutive Posts on Emotional Intelligence:-

Emotional Demands of life

Emotional Short Circuit - Need for Emotional Intelligence

2011-07-19T23:16:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This is purely my subjective thoughts on Emotional intelligence and my personal understanding after reading few books on the same topic.This is the second post on the topic.

Previous Post on Emotional Intelligence:
Over Emphasis on IQ

Need for Emotional Intelligence:
With the rise of Cold war, there was mutual suspicion among countries, between different states. There was a general mistrust and isolation which led to a nuclear stockpile by the superior powers. Developing countries followed suit. Terrorism thrived. Intelligently superior people called it strategy in their own right. Hold on...

Aren't we missing some thing here? Aren't we here for living with cooperation?Aren't we here to lead a peaceful life? The overemphasis on IQ has had a strong influence on the attitudes of the masses. But, all along researches were proving that High IQ does not translate necessarily into Successful Career and Outstanding responsible individuals. On the contrary, there were stars and super stars who were shining even if they lacked the fundamental education.

Though IQ was required, there was the strong need for Collaboration and co-operation between people, states and countries. With the more and more globalized economy, the importance of Mutual support and Diplomatic relations became inevitable.

Researches supported that Kids who exhibited emotional empathy in their childhood days, grew into successful leaders and great responsible citizens even though they had average IQs. There was a growing realization among people, organization, societies, states and countries for Emotional intelligence. The age was changing from control to consensus. Everybody's interests must be addressed for a wholesome organic growth. The job is complicated. Efficiency and Empathy were both required to drive projects and achieve the objectives.

Attitude Redefined:
Remembering Andrew McAffee's thoughts on technology used for medication, I was in fact wondering the vast attitude shift that has happened over the period of some 3500 years. What has western thought given to us? While the intentions are appreciable and noble, there is an inevitable shift in attitude.

In the ancient tamil Siddha tradition, Medicine was researched for the purpose of immortality and was achieved by severe penance and devotion. But the current state is so palpable that, Medicine is used for cures and life-sustenance. What a pity? What was used in proactive sense has now become reactive!! Doesn't that show that there has been a huge loss in our attitude towards our life style and quality of living!!

Such has been the same case with over emphasis on IQ, individual achievement and contribution. The focus now has to be redefined to achieve collaborative success where everyone's objectives are achieved in a peaceful and amicable manner. Fundamental attitude change is required. You can't keep aiming for the stars with an arrow designed in your mind. Action coupled with defined directions are required for the the needed change in attitude towards symbiotic growth.

Consecutive Posts on Emotional Intelligence:-

The Science behind Emotional Intelligence
Emotional Demands of life

Emotional Short circuit - Over emphasis on IQ

2011-07-19T23:15:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This is purely my subjective thoughts on Emotional intelligence and my personal understanding after reading few books on the same topic.This is the first post on the topic.

One of the most difficult questions that could torment a life is the simple question of one's own identity. The want from with in to see yourself in your true form is the unquenchable thirst in everybody's heart. The reason behind the search for one true identity is due to the multiple personas discovered under diferent situations of life. As time goes by, the mind slowly learns to accept multiple dimensions of one's mind and fine tunes its rules to prepare for known situations which has already been experienced, learns from the unknown and prepares itself for the future. But, Why? Why does the mind bother about the one definite ultimate identity in the first place? And, why should it prepare itself?

Evolution is the possible answer. Nobody knows why, but that is how our system works. All living systems for that sake thrives on it's identity. As living beings grow old, their form and identity keeps on changing and evolving. Beyond a point, it becomes incomprehensible as to why we were angry or ebullient or depressed or lonely. Poets and Novelists thrive on such emotions and Other men buy their books and poems.

I have always personally been a great fan of psychology. My interest comes from my interactions and discussions with my Grand father, Mr. Visveswaran, Retd. District Educational Officer. Having been a teacher all his life, he had shared his experiences and insights about brain development, cognition and behavior during our discussions. He had discussed about Sigmund Freud and nature of ego. From there, I pursued further and read some books on human psychology and social behavioral patterns and understand to some extent about this complicated subject.

In this series of posts, I would like detail about the Emotional Short circuit in our brains, IQ and EQ, Adaptive Social Learning and Decision making.

Why did I start researching on this topic?
All this started by reading a blog post by eminent researcher and thinker, Andrew Mcaffee. The blog post was about making use of IBM's Super Computer Watson as a Medical Diagnostician. Watson had won "Jeopardy" game competing with humans and had superior skills in Intelligent search, Contextual pattern matching and Efficient Data Analytics. The blog post called the super computer as Dr.Watson and suggested using the same to diagnose and treat all range of diseases as it claimed that there is a dearth of human doctors and by nature Humans are prone to errors.

Though I appreciate the intention to solve a social problem, My gut instincts and common sense commented,

With all due respect for Dr.Watson, I am still a firm believer of Human intuition and incomprehensible ability of humans to solve even complex situations. Our Knowledge is certainly not limited to data. Of course, it can help us arrive at better conclusions. The veracity of the data available for Dr.Watson must be strongly checked.

I strongly support Dr.Watson to be used for data analytics but certainly not in health care prognostications and personal diagnosis. For 99.99% diseases, medicines, tablets and treatments are not the cure. Do not make it worse with Dr.Watson. Let's keep it human.

And the comment was very well received as the same thoughts came from the bottom of my heart. The need for Human empathy is what made me think and take a closer look at our current state of affairs. With the growing list of support from machines, are we growing insensitive and indifferent to human emotional requirements ?

Over Emphasis on IQ:
It all started with World War I. With well established institutions and command over various sciences, it was during World War I, A special means of test was used in US Military and Army to identify, recruit and train human resources based on their intelligent quotient. Though Intelligence tests can be traced back to the efforts of Francis Galton to effectively measure evolution based on Charles Darwin's theory, it was Lewis Terman, who actually tested on a group of boys who were then famously called, Terman's Termites, and successfully developed that into a full fledged system for Human Intelligence evaluation.

Then on, IQ tests became a de-facto standard to measure one's potential. The rise of world war II and then followed by Cold war period all demanded the need for high intellectual power. Those with high IQs were mapped with high performance for their individual efforts and thereby IQ became the much demanded integral part of one's personality.

Super powers which controlled the war and therefore the world economy over emphasized on IQ and developed lot of highly skilled and individualistic personalities. The belief then was Independent thought and individual progress would sum up to the progress of the society and therefore national progress. It did work out well until the world was dominated by few countries during the imperialistic times.

In the name of War and Business, Rules and Terms were drafted to suit the needs of the imperial powers. The world and human mind slowly turned to work like a Mechanical Clock. There was World wars, Cold wars, Oil Wars, Ideological wars, and Economic wars. Though the countries strongly believed highly qualified [High IQ] people were appointed to deliver, there was strong discontent among different groups leading wars on different fronts. Times Changed. Several Countries which were considered backward rose from their slumber, fought for their independence and slowly was struggling for their own individualistic progress.

At this juncture, it is essential to question the over emphasis of IQ and IQ only. Even after having the best of minds to solve the problems, what is the missing piece in the puzzle? The answer is lack of Human Emotional empathy. Individualistic Intelligence was mostly used for Selfish purposes in order to maximize one's own profits. In the process, there was complete disregard for the emotional strain of people and nations that were exploited. The need for Emotional and Social Intelligence in every day life must be insisted to solve the perplexing problems of our society.

Consecutive Posts on Emotional Intelligence:-

Need For Emotional Intelligence
The Science behind Emotional Intelligence
Emotional Demands of life

The +1 Shawl

2011-06-23T01:01:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

He made up his mind to let her go. He didn't have any other option. she was wonderful, lively, casual, natural and impulsive. A dream character he had always wanted to witness in his life. The moments were true and honest. Even her silence spoke volumes. Love was flowing unconditionally with out an objective. He felt inspired infinitely. But, He had to make up his mind to let her go. That was the only sane decision.

Wasn't she feeling the same way? Wasn't the attraction mutual? The question thronged him. He carefully avoided that question but the answer was well known.

"She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends.

How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget"

The lyrics from Hotel California song by Eagles echoed in his ears. Indeed she got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends. And this couple of days were the dance to remember and the same dance to forget. He could do nothing but wonder how drugs could help people write insanely terrific lyrics. If only we could comprehend the events in our life, we would be much more sane.

He was a traveler from a distant south and was visiting the princess of hills far away. He reached the village atop mountain late in the evening and stopped by a tea shop for a black tea and a holy smoke. He was terribly hungry and tired after his journey. He never took up a regular job as it was too unnatural and uncomfortable for a lion to feed on grass. At the least he believed so. He had got all the instinctive inspirations from real life explorers like Alexander Supertramp of "Into the wild" fame but he wanted to make sure that he added some thing constructive to the society in his journey. He wanted to touch and move lives with his writing. His vision was to write about people, habits, beliefs, faith, relationships, trust and evolution to realize the oneness beyond man made boundaries. And destiny be it, he ran into her at the shop.

She had a magnetic personality. Her burnt dark lips were longing for a cigarette. She searched around for a matchbox and He had one in his hand at that right moment to lend it to her. The style with which she lighted her cigarette completely blew him away. She conveyed her thanks with a bewitching smile. He could only stand and wonder that where did this lightening come from in the clear skies. She had a husky voice with a touch of roughness in it. In a way commanding and appealing at the same time. Is there a word for it in diction? He was not sure. Her few moments of proximity crowded him with rapid heartbeat, dizziness, fainting, confusion and all at the very same moment. He was remembered of the quote by Stendhal that Love is like a fever that comes and goes independently of the will. "So True", he wondered to himself. He hadn't yet lit his cigarette and he realized that she had taken the matchbox with her.

He walked towards her sitting at the bench by the lake. The lake was tired after a day long work and was dozing off with a blanket of fog covering over it. The distant lights from the street lamps reflected in the silent waves of the pristine water. She was right there sitting and admiring the sublime beauty and smoking her last cigarette of the day. He was not sure if it was the last cigarette but he felt it was poetic to imagine that way. He walked towards her and one could imagine a cinematic shot where he walked into the frame where she was sitting on the bench facing the lake absorbed into the blissful reflections of tranquility. She was intensely self absorbed with thoughts what so ever unknown to him. She was looking deep in to the lake as if chasing an unanswered question. Will she get an answer? He prayed not as she was splendidly charismatic in her chase.A transient state amidst an intense thought process which only a few aspire to go through and there she was traveling lightening fast through the highway.

As he stepped closer towards her, She instantly realized that he had come for the matches to light his smoke. With a hexing smile, she whispered her "Sorry" in a husky tone and handed over the match box to him. And all the time, he was wondering about striking a conversation with her in one or the other way. Not that he was instantly smitten but just to keep company for a smoke. That logic seemed convincing. But how long can one hide the truth?

As he tried to initiate a conversation, a sharp command for Silence came from her. "Ssshhhh..." she insisted with her index finger crossing her lips and with a wink in the eye. Few moments of silence and smoke filled the scene. And after a little pause, in her beefy yet charming tone, asked him, "So, Who are you?".
In a witty way, "A Poet", he replied instantaneously with out any hesitation.
"A Poet? Good. What is that brings you here, Mr.Poet? And are you called "Frost" or "Woodsworth", came a teasing question. He did find her interesting.
"Am Called, Bharathi, Tamil Poet, you see..", he replied in a flow by borrowing a name of a revolutionary Tamil poet who lived 70 years ago.
"So, Who are you?", He questioned her.
With a sarcastic smile, "Hmm..If you are a poet, I must be an angel", came her playful reply.
Both laughed heartily at the absurdity of their conversation. But most of the times, such absurdity forms a solid base for strong relationships. The coldness in the air was getting thicker and thicker and their lips and lungs begged for another smoke.

"So Mr.Poet, Why don't you tell me a poem?" She requested.
"Well, I don't compose with out a fee", He replied with a naughty smile inviting more conversation with her.
"Alright, so, what is your demand? But in that case, I will have to give you a list of topics to compose poems on? Is that a deal?" She replied with childlike innocuousness.
"Well then, A little more proximity is my demand" He asked for in a very outright indecent manner. It should have been in his mind to have her that night. But this was not the way to put it to a girl and who is a total stranger.
The sky was indecently nude, flamboyantly displaying all its stars with scattered partial traces of cloud which was all the more seducing the mortals below on earth. No wonder, the half lit moon was having terrifying influence on his sexual concerns.
She gave a cold stare into his eye, dropped her cigarette and with a beguiling look in her eyes, moved close enough to whisper in his ears, "Do you want to go to bed with me?"

He didn't quite expect that from her. Nor was he actually planning to go to bed with her. But he thought it was fun and poetic to talk to a girl that way but it was turning out to be wild and unwieldy. While his emotional strings were pressurizing him to accept the offer with a stupefied "Yes", his rational mind was pleading with him to apologize to her and regain his respect and dignity.

As the episode was happening, he almost burnt his fingers as the cigarette burnt out and was terrified with stupor and shock at the response from her. Had the cigarette been in his mouth, he would have swallowed it in the jolt.With coldness mounting up, his temperature shot up. He was confused and perplexed and was in no way to comprehend the situation. He felt terribly awful but at the same time was wondering what would she reply if he were to say, "Yes".

As if, she knew his thoughts, she continued to pour down her thoughts from deep within, "Been through such things several times. Have been cheated, have been confused, have been forced, have been tortured and have seen almost every single fateful failure in my life. All that momentary love amounts only to tiredness at the end of the game and nothing more. Just plain tiredness. The pleasure vanishes with the sun rise, the fear, guilt and pain of life shines on us. The hunger for true love remains elusive.Do you understand? "She stood up and walked few steps towards the lake and lighted up another smoke and continued, "See it for yourself. Let the bodies roll with lust and passion. Let the fingers hold each other tightly and let the heart gasp for breath. With the lips locked and every single point in our bodies passionately lit up, let love make it's way and let's repeat the morbid exercise until the body is dead and tired. The want from within is quenched for the time being until it arises the next time even more fiercely. We will be enslaved and happy to oblige to our body's commands relentlessly pursuing the impermanent love life."

He was still not completely out of the unexpected response from her. He felt terribly embarrassed. He wasn't really playing around with her with any such fantasies in his mind. But, he shouldn't have made such a blunder. He did certainly like her charisma and personality and he had no clue as to why she had been telling all this to him. May be she knew that he was just playing around with her or May be no one else would be willing to listen to her rant this patiently. He was indeed listening to it with all due attention but could make only some sense of complex relationship related issues that she was pondering over. His temperature was shooting up inch by inch and the coldness had creep-ed in deep in to his ears slowly making him feel sick. By the time, she had finished her lecture, he was shivering out in the cold with the eyes swollen and painted red.

The next thing he remembered was waking up in her bed the next day. With his eyes half open, he felt as if a hundred suns were resting in his chest, throat and forehead. A severe flu with fever had infected him in the cold previous night. He could vaguely remember the conversation that had happened the night before. There she was, sitting by his side, with a piece of cotton cloth drenched in ice cold fresh water to apply in his forehead. It was very depressing moment for him. This care and affection from a stranger moved him to tears. Had he been left to himself in the cold, he would have been mortified by the sun rise.

"So, How are you feeling Bharathi?" she questioned in her casual tone. His heart filled with chagrin, he could only give an apologetic smile with a thank you note latent in it. The time went on and he adjusted himself to the comfort of the bed. She was living there in a small cottage which was good enough for her. There were two rabbits running hither and thither, pausing at times to wonder about the new species in their territory. He was served a corn soup with ginger tea for lunch. For him, all this looked like a dream. Why would a stranger do all this to him? He convinced himself that he had done some good karma in his past life to be served and nursed by the very girl whom he had teased the night before. As he slept semi-consciously, he could hear her footsteps now and then, walking towards him to check the temperature. As she touched, there was a supernatural dimension to it. He had felt such warmth and affection before only with in his mother's womb. Such sense of infinite care was like a second life to him. For that one touch, he would be willing to lay sick all his life.

He kept on recovering every minute and became fit enough for a stroll with her in the evening. He refreshed himself with a hot shower and readied himself for a walk. She took her umbrella and helped him with the double layered sweater. "You look fit enough, aren't you?" she said affirmatively. "Angel knows better.." he replied with his regained wit. They started out as they both exchanged pleasant smiles. It was as if they both had known each other for a very long time and never bothered to know their names in this birth. There was a mystical connection in their personalities.

The weather was absolutely idyllic and the lush green grass and washed away pathways were inviting. The seasonal rains were threatening any moment to hold them off but the light drizzle and cold breeze kept them company. The casual conversation started with a formal intro of them and as time went by, there was far more personal and serious topics covered. While she looked impulsive in the first sight, there was a depth in her personality. He was thrilled to know that she has learned martial arts years back. He thanked god that she didn't apply them on him the night before. After working for a couple of years, tired of the corporate world, she had come to stay in this small village and help the local NGOs with improving quality of life for the ostracized people. There was anger in her eyes when she spoke of the injustices done to the scheduled tribes living in the mountains. She had conviction and determination to give them a better life and expose them to better opportunities.

As she kept on talking, he developed a sense of deep attachment towards her. Her very presence made him feel joyful and his heart ebullient. It was magical and beyond comprehension for him. They reached a cliff to stand and pay respects for the transcendental sun set. As she stood there sublimated into nature, he had fallen in love with her. Not the kind of love that drags people into relationships and an institution called marriage but the love spoken by nature. Neither she would fit into one such cage. But the love towards her was true and platonic, honest and humble, a respect for another human for what ever she stood for. Unconditional acceptance of the ebbs and flows of human condition with out a second thought. He broke the silence with the golden words, "You are wonderful.." and he repeated again in a softer tone "You are wonderful.." to her. After a minute of pause, she returned a formal thanks with a saintly smile.

They continued to walk down to the market and then return to the place. He had decided to leave back to his home town post dinner. On the way, he decided to gift her something in memory of her warmth and care. A shawl would be an ideal gift. As she went for a smoke, he went around and purchased a moderately priced shawl that he could afford in turquoise blue. He was worried that she might not accept it and hence decided to give it to her only at the last moment before leaving.

The talks on social, ethical, moral issues continued. Personal space and boundaries got blurred. There was a cadence in their personalities and understanding at a subtle level. They can't claim they understood each other perfectly but good enough to be honest with each other. They returned, had dinner and he got ready to leave. He called her and made her stand in front of the small balcony. The lights were dim and the fireflies were playing around with their friends and relatives. "Can I tell you something?", he asked her with a little blush and smile. "You are not going to propose to me, right?" came a doubtful reply from her.

Spontaneously, he replied, "Far from it."
"Good then, Go ahead" came her command.

"You are natural, that is what you are. Like a flower that blooms, you are natural..And wonderful too. Take care. And for all your warmth and love, here is a little shawl as my gift.", he handed over the gift.

"Oh, I have so many of them gifted. Now you have given me one more of the same thing. That's a problem when you have lots of friends. You end up with lots of gifts and you do not know what to do with all of them." She replied candidly and questioned, "So, what is the return gift that I shall give?"

"Little more proximity", he replied with a fun filled tone. Bursting into laughter, She hugged him and kissed him on the forehead. "Good bye Bharathi. You take care." As her voice resonated repeatedly in his mind, he walked away and he convinced himself to let her go her own way. The river finds its way to ocean. Can a log change the flow? The bodies will perish. The memories will remain. The appearances will change, the love will flow uninterrupted. The instruments might differ but the music is one.

Few weeks later, I had to visit the same place. Memories gushed into my stream of thoughts bringing back all the radiance and oneness I enjoyed with her. There it was, the turquoise shawl wrapped around an old vegetable seller, aptly serving the warmness. Indeed a true giver as much as she took and with all that warmth and care, who would not fall in love with her! I am just a mortal.

A Spiritual Road Trip

2011-06-19T23:45:00.000-07:00

Summary of the spiritual road trip from May 13th to May 18th to various places in Tamil Nadu and Andra Pradesh.

My parents had planned this trip a month before and had consulted with various travel agencies in Madurai and found a decent deal.

Total Members: 6 [Family] + 1 [Driver]

Family:
Amma [ Annapoorani ]
Appa [ Harihara Subramanian ]
Me [ Karthick ]
Brother [ Koushick ]
Periamma [ Gomathy ]
Periappa [ Ramakrishnan ]

Driver: Kannan

Vehicle: Toyota Innova, Rs.13/- per Km

Every one else other than me was put up at Madurai for this trip. Periamma and Periappa had come from Tenkasi to Madurai 2 days back prepared for the trip. Since I don't have grandpa and grandma on my father's side, Periamma and Periappa are the senior most members of my father's family.

I had taken only one bag with 4 shirts and I had asked my parents to get 5 dhotis for each day of the trip. As the travel planned was very tedious and in the middle of Agni Nakshathiram, I decided to make the best use of our culture's greatest costume, dhoti. And I must say that it proved quite handy in the back to back travel. I reached Madurai on 13th May and got ready for the travel. My Mom had completed the Friday Pooja and gave us the Sweet pongal drenched in ghee. I slurped a little too much with out understanding the consequences.

We traveled approximately 1600+ Kms in 5 days and to 20 different places. The experience was unique and transcendental. We are extremely thankful to nature and all the gods and angels for letting us have a safe spiritual road trip. We prayed for every one we knew and we didn't knew. It was like an exploration of the self. This road trip not only brought personal changes and better connect in the family but also helped us understand the mystical interconnect between man and nature. We are nothing but cosmic dust and every single moment is a miracle gifted by god to every single living and non-living thing on planet earth.

Find below the list of places we traveled and visited as a part of this spiritual road trip. To some extent, if you are planning for a similar road trip, this list can be helpful.

Starting Point: AnnaNagar, Madurai. 6:45am

Pillayarpatti - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpaka_Vinayakar_Temple
Day: May 13th
Known for Lord Vinayaga's 6 ft huge rock cut shrine. No crowd at all and had a peaceful Darshan. We were just in time before the temple closes for the second shift pooja of the day.

Break Fast at Thirupathhur.

Alangudi - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alangudi
Day: May 13th
One among the nine navagraha shetrams. The temple here is for Guru Bhagavan. Clads a very serene and calm atmosphere and has an auro of wisdom of it's own. Has a huge huge Banyan Tree there which is supposedly been there for more than 2000 years.

Tanjore - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanjavur
Day: May 13th
Visited Brigadeshwara Temple. Ayyan Sannidhi was closed and was able to visit Ambal Sannidhi. Was mid day and it was so hot that we couldn't walk around.

Had to run around the temple. So massive and so mystical. The gigantic Nandhi was telling a tale of it's own. I could only imagine the hard work and perseverance that would have made this possible.

Had some excellent clicks to click. Got Puliyathorai prasadham in the temple.

Lunch at Tanjore

Thingalur - http://holyindia.org/temple/thingalur
Day: May 13th
One among the nine navagraha shetrams. The temple here is for Moon God. We had reached there at around 2:30pm and the temple opens only at 4pm.We parked the vehicle. Like a good Samaritan from the village, laid out a blanket and slept in front of the car. Took good rest and freshened up. Visited the temple and prayed well. The Lord who controls our mind and love clad in white blessed us all.

Drove to Thirukadaiyur and planned for night stay there. On the way had dinner at Vaitheeswaran Kovil in a restaurant called "Nethram". They had very good rooms and rich set up. It was very good but it would not work out as per our travel plan if we stayed in Vaitheeswaran kovil. So, went ahead to Thirukadaiyur and stayed there over night.

I was checking my office emails and looks some serious issue was going on. some 120 emails had come that day. I gave up and closed my laptop and never bothered to open up until I came back to Chennai.

Dinner at Vaitheeswaran Kovil.

Thirukadaiyur - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thirukadaiyur
Day: May 14th
The land of Lord Siva. Woke up early in the morning and visited the lord before breakfast and had very good Darshan. Here is where Lord Siva protected Markendeya from Yama and this is the place where "Abirami Pattar" composed Abiraami Andhaadhi. Must visit.

Break fast at Thirukadaiyur - at Iyer Mess

Thirunallar - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thirunallar
Day: May 14th
Dedicated Shrine for Lord Saneeshwaran and it was very important that me, my father and my brother visited this place as we all had 7.5 Sani happening as per the jadhagam and Rasi. A person who was standing in the queue with us was a well known person in the temple due to his high frequency visits and was able to get us into the Ambal sannidhi near Saneeshwaran Sannidhi. We were instructed to pay the sani bhagavan by looking at the feet.

And the most important point to note is Saneeswaran is the only one among all nava grahas to have the "Ishwara" pattam in his name. He has the power and control on us as much as Lord Siva himself. The one who least bothers about himself and is most concerned to make every one righteous and spiritual.

Thiruvenkaadu - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thiruvenkadu
Day: May 14th
Reached here around Lunch time. One among the navagraha temples. Temple is dedicated to Mercury who is responsible for Arts, Science and Creative elements of a person's personality and talent. We attended the afternoon pooja.

Sun was at its Zenith and we had to run around the temple. My periamma's foot was very badly burnt. But, I really wonder all those old days back in BCs where there were no slippers and devotees traveling thousand of kms to worship lord Shiva.

There is a dedicated shrine for AgoraMurthy [Agora form of Lord Shiva]. Appa came over and prayed thinking that the shrine is Ambal. Me and my brother couldn't resist laughing. On the way we also visited Ananthamangalam Anjaneyar Temple.

Lunch at Mayilaaduthurai

Aaduthurai - Sooriyanaar Kovil - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aduthurai
Day: May 14th
Temple for the Sun God. An important place in Ramayana and related to residence of Vanara Kingdom. Also known for it's rice varieties Aduthurai-32, Aduthurai-36.

Kanjanoor - http://www.templenet.com/Tamilnadu/s060.html
Day: May 14th
Land of Lord Sukran. [ Venus ]. This temple is so massive and has shrines for all the other Navagrahas as well. Has very good architecture . Lord Siva is called Agneeswarar as Fire is worshipped here.

Kilaperumpallam - http://holyindia.org/temple/keelaperumpallam
Day: May 14th
We reached here by evening. Temple had weird instructions as to how to go about worshipping Lord siva, Lord Kethu and the Kurai theerkum Vinayagar.

Thirunaageswaram - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thirunageswaram
Day: May 14th
The place of Naganatha Swami and one of those navagraha sthalams. The temple was comparatively huge to other temples and had a separate sannidhi for Rahu bhagavan. Paal Abhishekam done during the Raaghu kalam turns blue and here is where Nalan prayed lord Siva as well.

Uppiliyappam temple - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uppiliappan_Temple
Day: May 14th
This temple is also located in thirunageswaram but a special place for the Vaishnavites. A Huge shrine of perumal with "Maam evam saranam thvaja" written in his Abhaya Hastham commanding surrender at His feet for bliss and peace was so enlightening.

Vaitheeswaran kovil - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaitheeswaran_Temple
Day: May 14th
Visited Lord Siva who has the mystical powers to Cure all diseases. There was a very beautiful pond in the temple. I could imagine how this would have served in the olden days.

Dinner at Vaitheeswaran Kovil

No night stay. Drove to Thirupathi over night. watched "Sankara Baranam" movie and I tried to keep company to the Driver. But I felt terribly sleepy and went back to sleep. Then I woke up at 2am and till 7am when we reached tirupathi, I kept company. Almost dozed in a couple of occasions.

Thirupathi - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tirupati_%28city%29
Day: May 15th

Was dead tired on reaching Tirupathi.had booked rooms in the Devasthanam lodge. Went there and slept till 9:30am. Along with my mother, My brother went and booked another room for us which was actually not permitted. But, thanks to my Brother's determination that we got an extra room.

The rooms were very well equipped and the process was very good. No other place in the world can handle such level of chaos and disorder. Great Job. We got ready for visiting Thaayar sannidhi. But My brother was tired and he preferred to stay back.

Visited Thaayar Sannidhi and came back to Tirupathi for Lunch. Went to Hotel Mayura and had a superb lunch. Around 120 rs for every one. But it was worth it.

Kalahasthi - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Srikalahasti
Day: May 15th
Evening Visit to Kalahasthi. Couldn't see the paathala ganapathi but visited Lord siva. This is one of the pancha bootha sthalam for Wind. There was a very big mandapam where me and my brother climbed up. The place was so mystical and transcendental. I got to know that the lamps do not wiggle in the wind but never remembered to observe it.

Came back to Tirupathi, went to Govindaraja Perumal Sannidhi[The one that was brought from Chidambaram during the rule of KirimiKanda Cholan] and had dinner after that.

Tirumala - Akash ganga, Papavinasam, Tirumala temple
- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tirumala_Venkateswara_Temple
Day: May 16th

Early morning we left to Tirumala. Excellent Views and climate. Simply wonderful trip. Reached there. Found a place to park the vehicle and got the room booked. We found it very difficult to find out where the Office was but eventually found out. The room was out right pathetic. And I made up my mind that I will never stay there over night. Had breakfast at Annapoorna.

We decided to go to Akash Ganga and Papavinasam. It was a very good decision as we had the darshan scheduled only at 5:30pm. We went to PapaVinasam first and me and my father took bath in the pristine cool water. There was one amazingly beautiful girl clad in red pavadai thavani sitting near my mom. Wow! My mom didn't even bother to ask her name. Any how, lost her there and never to be seen again.

Visited Akash Ganga which was very poorly maintained. My parents, perima and periappa took some snaps there and came back to Tirupathi by mid day. had lunch at Annapoorna.

Me and my father got tonsured and I had a small kudumi as it was mandatory for doing my sandya vandanam pooja every day. By 3:30pm we went to the temple to inquire about the Sahasra Deepa Alankara Seva which we had booked.

We met Lakshmi, the little kid. It was so wonderful talking to him. My parents argue that Lakshmi is a girl but since Lakshmi was in Trousers and shirt, I was so convinced that lakshmi was a boy. Does it matter? So cute and lovely were his talks and action and he was talking decent Tamil. Simply loved the moment there. He asked to sit in front of the Seva place and said that it will start by 5:30pm. My mom had the privilege to clean and mark kolams for the Seva.

Seva was blissful. So buoyant was the Pooja and we were also covered by TTD Channel. Then we joined the queue to See the perumal and had a very good Darshan at the temple. Received Prasadham. Came back and had Dinner.

I convinced my parents that we leave over night to Vellore as the room was really awkward.

Vellore - Golden temple, jalakandeshwarar - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vellore
Day: May 17th
Reached Vellore at midnight and found a decent place to stay. Slept well. Woke up in the morning to visit Golden Temple at the outskirts and Jalakandeshwarar temple[One of the pancha bootha sthalam for Earth]. Lord Siva in JalaKandeshwarar temple is made of Sand and hence No abhishekam will be done there.

Golden temple had beautiful architecture and had all elements of Maandrikam there. It resembled the cages of Tirupathi and had a sage who was over seeing all the operations. Ambal was seated in the middle of water pool in a golden temple and was worshipped all through the day.

Had Lunch at Gopal anna's home at Vellore. Met Bharath and Chinni and started to Thiruvannamalai.

Thiruvannamalai - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thiruvannaamalai
Day: May 17th
Reached Thiruvannamalai in the evening and visited the temple. It was massive. It was Full Moon day and we witnessed a strange thing. At 6pm. during the evening pooja, pigeons in the temple tower circled the tower thrice clockwise and anti-clockwise and flew away. It was strange and weird. No body seem to bother about it and my brother argued that it is coincidence.

Also visited Pathala Lingam where Sage Ramana did penance. Had a splendid Darshan at the temple. Always wanted to visit this place. went around the Girivalam route in the car itself and took some good shots of the moon and drove to Kanchipuram.

Kanchipuram - ekambareshwarar, Vaikunda perumal, Govindaraja Perumal, kailasanaathar, Kanchi kamakshi - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kanchipuram
Day: May 18th
Reached Kanchipuram at Midnight again. Found a decent room opposite to Rama's cafe. Woke up in the morning.

Freshened ourselves, had breakfast at the famous Iyer cafe and visited Ekambareshwarar, Vaikunda Perumal, Govindaraja Perumal Sannidhi. Here is where we saw a dedicated place for Lizard.

First we went to Kailasanathar temple as per Koushick's suggestion but it was not yet open. So we went to other places and revisited Kailasanathar temple at around 11am. It was known for it's praharam around massive Lord Siva shrine. There were two small pathways to get in and get out in the praharam which were synonymous to our life and rebirth. It is said that, if we go in through that, we are said to have reborn.

My father was very skeptical but some how managed to get in and get out through that holes. But, looks like he remained the same. After coming out, he enacted how he came in and out to the driver. That was real funny. He couldn't believe himself that he came out of that narrow hole in the praharam.

Then we went to Kanchi Kamakshi temple and had a very good darshan. Also visited Kanchi Sankaracharya who was performing Chandra Mouleeswara Pooja. Appa, Perima and Perippa wanted to have the prasadham at the mutt. Me, my mother and Koushick came back to have lunch at Rama's cafe. Had Lunch.

I decided to leave back to chennai as I have to rejoin office on 19th may. They then left to Trichy and had darshan and Samayapuram Mariamman and Thirvaanaikaval. Then, 20th May they reached Madurai Safely.

Looking back, We ourselves couldn't believe we managed the trip to visit all the places and even places we hadn't planned. Overall, We are very thankful again to god for his kindness and blessings.

Thanks for the patient read.

For Pictures - http://www.flickr.com/photos/karthickhariharan/sets/72157626757853394/

Dreams Childlike

2011-06-06T03:17:00.000-07:00

What is this girl's dream?

A dream of exploration and conquest.

A Dream of silence and tranquility and A dream of hope and love.

The dream lies North and the north will take her away. The clouds would tease her and the wind would hurt.

But for her true love,

She would rise through the tall and high mountains, which were waiting to be conquered by her.

Will She return ?

Why would she return? She belonged there. Does she?

She shall stand there frozen in time.

She would precipitate as the snow and flow down as glacier, wild and unwieldy.

Melt into a stream and roll through the plains

She shall blend with the air touching lives

She shall amalgamate into the ocean and evaporate into the sun

She shall shine as the light and realize she belonged everywhere

A part of the whole and Every part in the whole

For she is all pervading and pervading all..

That Unanswered Question

2011-06-06T00:26:00.000-07:00

She sat by the window, looking deep into the space, chasing that unanswered question.... Will she get an answer? I hope not for she is splendidly magnetic in her chase...

The disconnected man

2011-05-23T08:48:00.000-07:00

I stay behind the bars far away from the truth relegated to destiny, self abnegated. I wait for magical arms to wrap me up and free me through. But the bars in the window won't allow. I will die hoping that love will free me. The hope will never be answered for the truth is we are all disconnected men, disconnected from truth by hope.

[Thanks to Revathi for the inspirational snap]

Empowerment of Women

2011-04-10T03:58:00.000-07:00

History of the world is long and complicated. A birth right could have morphed into a luxury! A luxury could have become a sin. A sin could have become the accepted way of living. Women Empowerment is one such thorny issue faced by almost all nations cutting across all continents.The issue is rampant across diverse societies and communities and stand to pose a huge problem to the organic human development.

In a progressively developing nation like India, lack of women empowerment is a weed in the paddy field. While it is practical to assume that it is just sufficient to attend to it, as and when the issue props up, it is important to ponder over the long term solution to curtain and seal the issue, once and for all. Wish, the world is that simpler!

Why is empowerment important ? what is the pertinent issue?
Empowerment is a sign of a balanced world. Not just in gender but in all aspects from religion, politics, education and security. A Nation is a group of societies aligned together on principle, beliefs and morals. A Society is group of families that live with communal harmony enabled by the regional infrastructure. Hence a Family is fundamental to ensure that there is organic growth in the nation. A Family is usually a man and a woman. But the rules are being re-drafted in some part of this world. But, Generally, A family is usually a man and a woman living together in marital bliss.

The fundamentals of empowerment begins with this atomic family in the societies of nations. This families are the real wealth of nations. And what if there is imbalance between the man and woman regarding their respective powers, rights, thoughts and responsibilities ? Such an imbalance leads to instability and leads to marital complications such as divorce. Such events are proven to be distracting for their offsprings and are known to bear life long acrimony between the partners and the child. Once the root is corrupt, the plant will eventually die from with in.

There fore it is, absolutely essential to empower women on par with Men to make sure their interests and requirements are addressed right from the bottom of the pyramid to the very top. It is not just women empowerment. There is a pressing need to understand and improve the dire indigent situation of Transgenders as well.

For the nation to be buoyant, united and judicious, the societies must be adaptive and should accommodate interests of every citizen. If the balance does not exist, the societies must learn to empower the underprivileged. That would make the world a better place to live in for every one.

How to Solve the quagmire?
Empowerment is not emancipation, financial independence or literacy. The glib response that we often receive from most of the people are "Education" and "Financial Independence" can help empower woman. I don't disagree but they don't empower women. They are just enablers. They are not mandatory. They are not the magic keys to woman empowerment.

Let me raise my questions before I go on to substantiate my ideas. Say, If education can empower woman, what is the state of the illiterate woman in this country ? Are you going to educate them or are you going to empower them ? The next question is If Financial independence can empower woman, Should that mean only woman who are financially independent deserve to be empowered?

Democracy is empowerment of people. Apply the above two questions to Democracy. Do you hear me? The same applies to woman empowerment as well.

The solution is simple yet the most difficult of all options to implement. It is only by participation that woman can be empowered. Irrespective of Education and their financial independence, it is important for the societies to listen to women from all walks of life. They want to be heard. They must be encouraged to speak up. They must be strengthened to stand up and point out issues in the society. They must be supported to realize their needs and wants. Woman must start to be bold and speak up.

Egyptians and Tunisians were empowered because they chose to stand up against their autocratic governments.Let the empowerment start in the family, spread to Education, Social Security, Health Care, Regional Politics, International Affairs, International Justice and what not. We are all born equal and empowered but we are blinded by history.

Education is absolutely essential but should not be made a mandatory hurdle to empower woman. Education is a value addition and not a prerequisite. Life with all its experience has given us great leaders than just the educated ones. On discussing with one of my friends, he claimed that educated women can find jobs of their own and be financially independent even in the situation of divorce. Though it is a very valid point, It keeps me thinking that whether education is meant to prepare people for their divorce. Is that empowerment? I don't think so.

There is a pressing need for long term strategic thinking than to be swarmed by short term myopic ideas. When I look at developed countries, there is high rate of education, high rate of financial independence, very high rate of failed marriages and high rate of juvenile cases. Does that mean any thing? There is also a possibility that the educated and financial independent woman resign themselves to their day job and keep away from the need to be empowered. Other wise, why is the divorce rates that high ?

In India, As per the Hindu rituals, The men say the following to the women during the wedding ceremony:

“With God as guide, let us take, the first step to nourish each other, the second step to grow together in strength, the third step to preserve our wealth, the fourth step to share our joys and sorrows, the fifth step to care for our children, the sixth step to be together forever, and the seventh step to remain lifelong friends, perfect halves to make a perfect whole.”

Now, that is empowerment. Empowerment helps families, societies and nations make a perfect whole. It is improper to educate and financially emancipate women for a fall back option during an extremely devastating divorce.

So, What will empower woman ?
Safety and Participation in every fragment of Society and Nation will empower women. Reservation when properly implemented shall hold the key to empower woman. Improper implementation of a noble policy idea shall not lead us to conclude that the policy in as such is wrong and amoral.

Empowering is providing equal platform and does not define outcome of it. It builds the platform for every body to make their voices heard.Empowerment will not happen until women are given the right atmosphere and platform to think about what they actually need.
.
“To call women the weaker sex is libel; it is man’s injustice to women.” Mahatma Gandhi

Women has to realize this. Making them conscious is possible via education but it is not the end in itself. It should lead to the public discussion and importance of women and equal significance and participation.

As Mahatma Gandhi rightly pointed out, "When a woman can walk safely at midnight in India, I will declare India is Free". When that happens, you shall know the woman is empowered. Let's take every step in that direction and not be lost in myopic ideas. Please feel free to correct me and point flaws in my ideas if you feel so rightly.

Fundamental Doubt in Multiplication

2011-03-29T08:25:00.000-07:00

My understanding is multiplication is repeated addition.

i.e) 3 * 4 = 3 + 3 + 3 + 3 = 12

And, The rules are
+ve * +ve = +ve
-ve * +ve = -ve
-ve * -ve = +ve

Eg:
3* 4 = 3+3+3+3 = 12
(-3) * 4 = (-3) + (-3) + (-3) + (-3) = -12

But to me, it is puzzling to understand what it means by 3 * (-4).

Say, I don't know the nature of output of such an operation. How will I do the multiplication? The understanding lies in the proof of multiplication. (a) * (-b) = (-a) * (b) = -ab

But, 3 * (-4) would mean, adding 3 repeatedly for -4 times. Doesn't make any sense..... But by using the proof done for the statement above [ Please point me to the proof!!], we understand that it can be understood as adding (-4) repeatedly 3 times to get -12.

Wait, here comes the big doubt then.

(-3) * (-4) = 12

How is the nature of the negative multiplied by negative, at the end, a positive value?

Take the number line.
(-3)-----(-2)-----(-1)-----(0)-----(1)-----(2)-----(3)-----(4)-----(5)-----(6)------(7)-----(8)-----(9)

If (-3) * (-4) means multiplying (-3) for (-4) times, To get a positive number, I must be traveling in the opposite direction of the number line to account for the negative sign of the multiplier.

If I repeatedly add 4 times from (-3) in the above time line,

i.e) from -3, keep on adding 3 towards the positive direction 4 times. The count comes to +9. But the multiplication table says +12 which is the total number of hops made on the timeline.

I would really appreciate if you can clarify my fundamental doubt in multiplication.

Thanks Madhan, Priya, Koushick, Rajagopal and Ramanujam Sir for taking your time to clarify my fundamental doubt.

UPDATE: My Bad. Completely silly mistake. I have made a silly mistake of starting at the origin. That is what differentiates that from plain addition.

Firstly multiplication is NOT repeated addition ! this is so for natural numbers, but that's all. forget negative numbers, how would you get 2/3 X 5/7 as repeated addition, or worse, pi X pi ? indeed, that's why we define a field as a set with two operations on it, + and X; if one were definable from the other, we wouldn't do so.

now about - X - = +. this of course follows from -1 X -1 = 1. (all negative numbers can then be thought of as -1 X a positive number.) your question is, why is this so ? answer: it is a convention. i would prefer to call it a definition (which is almost the same thing!)

thus, there is no way of proving that - x - = +. (conventions or definitions cannot be proved, they can only be agreed to).

a certain operation is defined on a set. we wish to consider a larger set and
to extend the definition of the operation to a larger set. while doing so, we look at the properties of the operation in the smaller set and decide which ones we wish to retain and which ones we wish to drop. not all properties need be retained. for example, for natural numbers, it is always true that a x b >= a and a x b >= b. the way multiplication is extended to integers and to rationals, neither of these statements continues to hold true in the extended set.

examples of such extensions abound in maths. for example, cech introduced the idea of simplicial homology and cohomolgy; the idea was so useful that it was extended to groups and lie algebras. but this had to be selective; some properties of cohomology were not very desirable, while others were.

if you want an algebraic answer, -1 X -1 = 1 if you want distributivity. here is the argument: it is easy to see that
0=(-1)x0
= (-1)x [(-1)+1]
= [(-1)x(-1)]+[(-1)x1] by distributive property
= [(-1)x(-1)]+(-1) since we know (-1)x1=(-1)

adding 1 to both side of the above equation we get
1={[(-1)x(-1)]+(-1)}+1=[(-1)x(

-1)]+[(-1)+1] by associative property of addition
=(-1)x(-1).

The Fictitious Jiddu K collection

2011-03-24T09:39:00.000-07:00

Fictitious Jiddu K a.k.a FJK is a mostly invisible and a formless vapor commingled into the infinite space-time. He condenses as Philosophy, Ideas and Opinions. Have a read below.....

On October 26th, 2011:
I have been propelled far away without sufficient fuel.

The ignorant and the enlightened laugh their way to death.

On October 14th, 2011:
All through these years I have tried finding the God Particle resulting in failed attempts. In failure, I found God Himself. Trust me, he is equally excited about that particle ~FJK

On September 28th, 2011:
If anything can corrupt your mind inside out, it is History. ~ FJK

On September 5th, 2011:
I thank all my teachers for not interfering with my learning. ~ Fictitious Jiddu K on Education.

On September 4th, 2011:
Lies are nothing but extreme form of exaggeration. ~ Fictitious Jiddu K on Lies.

On August 30th, 2011:
Sage Valmiki was once a thief and then he transformed into a Sanskrit Poet to Write Ramayana. Nehru grew as an erudite scholar to write "Discovery of India" in 1940s and became a thief later. [ Fictitious Jiddu K on Reading "Discovery of India"]

On August 18th, 2011:

Interviewer: How do you qualify for teaching?
Fictitious Jiddu K : Well, I am good at brain washing and hypnosis.

On July 20th, 2011:
When the spirit is divided by nothing, infinity is experienced irrespective of the spirit. [ Fictitious Jiddu K on "Infinity"]

On July 19th, 2011:
Music that dissolves "I".... Overflowing with devotion, that I involuntarily surrender. A beautiful Prayer on Universal Mother sung meticulously... What can a poor guy contribute? May be the tears that pierce out of his closed eyes imbibed in the ocean of universal love.... what else can a poor guy contribute..... [ Fictitious Jiddu K on "Poor Guys Devotion"]

On July 17th, 2011:

Girl: I am bloody tired. Stop Stalking me.
Guy: You have stolen my bloody heart.
Girl: Oh.. [Pause] ok. [Opens a bag] Find yours. :|
Guy: !@#$%%%! [They all looked the same.]

- Fictitious Jiddu K on Tragic Love Stories.

On May 20th, 2011:
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is a choice. [ Fictitious Jiddu K's Brother ]

On May 12th, 2011:
Software is a bug on hardware. [ The fictitious Jiddu K on 'Developing Software']

On April 24th, 2011:

Death is a soliloquy. And Indeed a tough one. It demands a life time of experience to perfectly deliver. And yes, It looks so real. The rest who are left to ponder are none but Imposters who will eventually perfect themselves. [ The Fictitious Jiddu K on "Imposters"]

On March 24th, 2011:
Past is a beautiful dragon as long as it doesn't open it's mouth. [Fictitious Jiddu K on "Past Perfect"]

On March 11th, 2011:

There is a difference between being rude and being candid in conversations. To walk the tight rope is an art. Communication is indeed one such art ! [ Fictitious Jiddu K on " Communication in a competitive world"]

On Feb 25th, 2011:
Speech opens the fool in us. [ Fictitious Jiddu K on "Speeches and Talks"]

On December 21st, 2010 :
Yoga is like cleaning the vessel. Mantra/Prayer is like filling it with appropriate items. What is the point if you just keep cleaning the vessel and not fill it with the right things ? [ The Fictitious Jiddu K on "Instilling consciousness" ]

On December 19th, 2010 :
Words = K[Thoughts] Where 0 < K < 1 [ The fictitious Jiddu K on "Word-Thought equilibrium ]

On December 05th, 2010 :
For a writer, there are only two kinds of people. One is him and other, his characters. [ The fictitious Jiddu K on "Being a writer and telling a story" ]

On November 19th, 2010 :
Beauty strikes you before Morality. [ The fictitious Jiddu K on "Form and beauty"].

On November 16th, 2010 :
"To remember" is a talent. "To forget" is an art [ The fictitious Jiddu K on " The Art of Forgetting"]

On November 11th, 2010 :
The only natural music is silence. Every thing else is man made. [ The fictitious Jiddu K on Music ]

On November 10th, 2010 :
To be a leader is to willingly accept and feel responsible. [ The fictitious Jiddu K on leadership].

On November 06th, 2010 :
[ The Fictitious Jiddu K to his questioning brother]
Brother : Why do you want to tell stories ?
Fictitious Jiddu K : I don't know. I just want to tell...
Brother : But, Why?
Fictitious Jiddu K : Okay. I will tell you the truth. I tried painting. It didn't work out.

On October 29, 2010 :
The fact that you are organized means, you must also be prepared for Chaos. - [ The fictitious Jiddu K on Thoughts on Management ]

On October 25, 2010 :
Every Conversation and every moment is a story revealed. [ The fictitious jiddu K about his thoughts on Stories ]

On October 18, 2010 :
It's the unwise who babble. The wise are always Silent. [ The fictitious Jiddu K - Realizing his stupidity and inabilities, On "His learning on VijayaDasami, 2010].

On October 10, 2010 :
Writing is definitely a penance. Hmmm.. Not really, it is something that is possible post penance. One can write, and think about writing only when at peace with oneself. [ The Fictitious Jiddu K on "Writing Stories" - after reading "The English Teacher" ]

Religion and Computer programming are similar. Both has been written over a long time that we need commentaries to comprehend them. [ The Fictitious Jiddu K on Coding practices in Entreprise ]

September 25, 2010:
You can't have lions and keep feeding them grass.... [ Jiddu K on "How to tame Lions" ]

September 24, 2010:
Power cuts coupled with heavy rains are precious to me. I can put down my books, switch off my laptop, stay away from mobile and sit at ease in my balcony, stare deep into the sky, think of life, retrospect and intellectually advance. [ Jiddu K on Powercuts and rains ]

September 17, 2010:
It's about madness. For once, Being mad is not an illness. [ Jiddu K on Harishchandrachi Factory movie ]

September 17, 2010:
At Pilani, I had a choice to choose the professors I can attend, the classes I wanted to go. I chose Kurosawa, Fellini, Bergman, Kubrick, Coen Bros, De sica, Tornatore and I never missed a single class of them . [ Jiddu K on his college education ]

September 12, 2010:
Being connected with every entity in and around, yet unperturbed. That's sanyasa. [jiddu K on Sanyasa]

August 15, 2010:
What is a Revolution? What is it to Stand for Independence? What is to fight against a revolution? What is Democracy? What is sacrifice? What is dignity? What is life ? What is to cry for some one...? What is to be free? [ Jiddu K on Battle of Algiers ]

August 12, 2010:
While beauty provokes the poet with in, the "not-so" beautiful [ synonymn : Ugly ] invokes the Philosopher with in. But remember the not-so beautiful need not necessarily provoke pessimism. When the ugliness is generalized, it looks optimistic, while it is localized, it looks pessimistic. [ Jiddu K after reading about... Paul Satre and his thoughts on a day when he had a bad hair cut which made him Look ugly..].

July 24, 2010:
Simple things are not necessarily easy. Eg: E=mc^2 is simple but never easy. [ on "Oh that's simple" by Jiddu K]

May 13, 2010:
I am not a messiah to convey messages..I am just a casual passer by.. who appreciates every second of life. There is a fundamental idealogical difference!!......[ Jiddu K on Film making ]

April 15, 2010:
Beethoven is the best companion when you have to battle with your mind....Rx : Take the "Fur Elise"...Remember this music..!!!! :) .. For all the subtle talk....Rx: take the "Moon light sonata"[ On Beethoven ]

April 10, 2010:
There were days when i wept badly for the loss of my one and only favorite shirt..I argued with Her...I know she would respond always in Her own style....[ "Nostalgia and the nostradamus in me". by Jiddu k]

April 2, 2010:
The sooner you make new friends, the sooner you will have old ones..... [ Impressive line from "What do you say after you say hello?" ]

Febraury 21, 2010:

"I have lived the peaks for a long time........ This is time now to graze the valleys of life.." ---Words from Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev on conscretion of Dhyana Lingam, Isha, Velliyangiri.

Feb 14, 2010 :
Ithu amudhathin oru sottu thaan.....!! [ ON Illayaraja's Santhanthil padaatha kavithai song composition style with just three notes ]

Feb 12, 2010 :
Over drained and over worked....Pursuit of creativity is exhaustive and tedious.....but burning out is just the
beginning..The walk through the hidden dimensions of space and time, creating and destroying lives and property at your will.....[ Jiddu K on story writing....]

Feb 9th, 2010 :
Life is defined only as we know it. But the anamoly here is What we know has limits where as life isn't limited... [After a long time by Jiddu K!!]

December 22nd, 2009:
There is a need for a phase to be silent, retrospect and then the phoenix moment follows... [ On phoenix ]

December 16th, 2009:
Things fall in to place when it the time is right... [ Jiddu K on 'About things']

December 9, 2009 :
Q: What is you One big Ambition? A: To Conquer Everest and Atlantic Q: Why not the Arctic? A: If it exists for Another 25 years. Surely, i Will add it to my list. [ Jiddu K ] [ On global warming ]

December 8, 2009 :
Q: Sir, Why are you growing Long Hair? A: To pull mountains from a safe distance. [ Jiddu K on an Interview, while he was growing long hair... ]

November 29, 2009 :
The process is more exciting and fun than the final product. [ On Editing/Proof reading by Jiddu K ]

November 25, 2009 :
At times, you have to do "Absolutely" nothing to get paid [ On work by Jiddu K ]

Icarus was wrong. He shouldn't have tried to fly near to Sun with a pair of Wax wings. He should have been intelligent enough to carry another pair in case of emergency. [ On Icarus by Jiddu K ]

You are free to think different, but you should be fine with being a social outcast. [ Miscellaneous stuff by Jiddu K ]

November 23, 2009 :
The courage comes from the knowledge that you have nothing much to lose. [ Jiddu K ]

The problem is .. I am a thinker...Intuition says, it rhymes well with Loser..But it surely takes time to realize that intuition was not wrong that it rhymes.... but your hasty logic paired it with Loser. It surely takes experience to know it rhymes as well with winner...Doesn't matter beyond a point though..[ Miscellaneous stuff by Jiddu K ]

The image you see in mirror is not exactly a reflection..In the sense, it reflects light but the image is complementary...to put it mathematically it is the the line towards the other end of zero... [ On Retrospection by Jiddu K ]

Many a times, I have made people say to me "You don't belong here". At times, I have felt the same. But now, an inevitable choice is imposed on me, to find out where i belong. I do not know whether i ll find it but the search has truly began [ Jiddu K on taking Sanyasa ]

English alphabets contradict a lot with my personal beliefs. L before M, S before T..etc etc..It just doesn't work well with me atleast [ When Eliza proposed to Jiddu K ]

November 10, 2009:
Some people think they are smart...But a subset of them think others are dumb...[ From Role Play by Jiddu K ]

November 4, 2009 :
This fading memory of me(You) in others who were once consistently remembering me(You) ...I call it a necessary destruction and a requirement for my(Your) metamorphosis...The beauty lies in the fact that the former realization of others forgetting me(you) triggers the change...[From Failing Memories By Jiddu K]

October 30, 2009 :
Certain things in life...You can't afford to miss them. You have to willfully accept them. No question of choice. Failure is one of them...I would even recommend taking them once in a while...

October 26, 2009 :
It is always easy to reject and difficult to accept. So they always start by rejecting...

October 23, 2009 :
has been thinking about How logarithms as a concept evolved from Area under hyperbola!!! and has gone crazy working out the same in the curves in the front door of his house!!

October 15, 2009 :
It hurts when ideas, opinions and emotions are mistaken...Really ...

October 14, 2009 :
Eccentricity and Genius Complement each other. When She said I was an eccentric, I just have to turn myself to see the genius.....

October 13, 2009 :
Naturally as an intellectual, i had to move from science to religion to Morals and values....Thats the reason i am trying to comprehend the "The Idea of justice"...[ On picking up Amartya sen's book to read ]

Civilization is a brutal lie

October 6, 2009 :

Euler's Generalization of Fermat's little theorem is troubling me...I still can't figure out what the generalization implies or inflicts... [ While reading "What is mathematics ? " by richard courant ]

No Man in an Island..but why does he feel like one in the first place??? There should be some thing more to it...

October 4, 2009 :
Vigenere cipher - It required an eccentric genius like Babbage to crack it...

October 1, 2009 :
When people are trying to retrospect...i am trying to extrapolate....

September 25, 2009 :
From "What is History" by EH Carr - "There exists a dynamic equilibrium between the past and future, between the fact and interpretation, between values and moral judgement, between the subject and object, between the historian and the history"

.... Awesome isn't!! History framing the historian to reveal itself.....

September 23, 2009 :
Pretty women ... pretty women can be cold blodded Murderers..."Lust, Caution" by Ang Lee....I will not be able to recover from it's impact for quite some time......I was strong at heart when I was ignorant..

September 13, 2009 :
Human Beings Enter into definite and necessary relations which are independent of their will - Karl Marx ( in Critique of Political Economy) - I am reading all this awesome stuff inspired by Alexander Supertramp.....

On History and Society by EH Carr - "Society acts as the input in shaping the individual and in return the individual leaves an impact on the society which need not necessarily be positive but those impacts which are extreme are registered as history... All Said.. This is just one dimension of History"....

September 7th, 2009 :
Creating fear about the negatives will not stop them... Create fear about losing the positives they have had..... That will stop them....

September 1st, 2009 :
f(x,y,z) is no more true but f(x,y,z,t) is.... [ On space time revelation by Einstein ]

August 14, 2009 :
Losing.... I think is surely part of the big game... But the best thing is the game does not stop there.....

July 31, 2009 :
Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood. - T.S Eliot

March 20, 2009 :

A blue black hole [ On rumour that IBM will acquire SUN ]

Pebble by the beach side

2011-03-22T10:52:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

I sat down on the sand by the beach side staring at the pebble washed away in the shore. I wondered about how on earth did this pebble land here.I was puzzled by my curiosity to unlock the mystery behind this bewitching pebble. I had never been distracted by a pebble captivating enough to overpower a transcendental sunset at the beach. But still, Here I was, sitting and staring at the pebble. As if the pebble had the power to hypnotize, I was leaped back, deep and wide, into my memories. Years back in my school life was where my chute-the-chute stopped. Rolling and wading through the bitter sweet past, I saw myself standing piously over one corner of a stage. That was when I was in my eleventh grade, few years before.

It was the sorcerous alchemy of idyllic spring coupled with the monotonous school that was playing it's tricks on me. Needless to say, the blossom of the spring arouses the Shakespeare and Shelly in everyone. Infatuations were order of the day. To quote from Tennyson, "Girls may come and Girls may go, But I go on forever". This was "Song of the broke". Few arrows of love were returned with grace but mostly I missed the shots. Some arrows misfired. I was lucky enough to have quite a handful of charming girls in my class. Some were interesting and while a few were worth pursuing. And yes, She was special.

It was our annual school day function. The stage for celebration was set. As a responsible organizer, I was standing piously over one corner keeping a close tab on managing the events. As the fate would have it, She was destined to do the compering. A full evening to be spent right in front of my evil eyes. If only she had known what would happen to her, she would never had accepted to do the compering. Neither did I know.

I could never understand the jolt that her eyes sent through me. So pulverizing that it froze and unfroze me concomitantly. I remember being revitalized head to foot. As she glanced behind to signal me to make arrangements for the next event, I had felt a thousand moons dancing around me. She was looking gorgeously elegant in her red salwar, and it would have been a sin if I hadn't fallen for her looks. The clouds rung the bells of love and it had never stopped until I proposed to her a few years later. As time would have it, we were brought together for organizing and participating in various functions to represent our school. We had developed a very good mutual understanding and affection for each other. It was a great turning point for me. Her love and care were such an inspiration for me. I loved her more than any thing else in this world.

All the events that followed the school day conspired to bring us emotionally closer. I knew when she would laugh and cry and she knew when I would lie. I was rejoicing the blissful phase of truly first love. It was the last one too. I knew I was too young and immature to have found the love of my life but I couldn't convince myself otherwise. I tried hard to resist my love for her but all my attempts would always end futile. I tried not speaking to her. I tried my best to move away from her. There was no point working against the tide. I could believe nothing but we were made for each other.

There came a point where we had to part. The school was done and we had to go to different colleges to pursue respective interests. We bid off farewell and I hadn't yet expressed my love for her. We promised each other that we will exchange letters. From all the clues and my grasp of girl's psyche, I believed that she shared the same emotions for me. I had validated it few times with "I Miss you - Me too " conversations. We were separated by around 3000 kms apart but we continued to communicate via letters, emails and week end telephone calls.

I still distinctly remember about having to wake up as early as 7:30am on terribly cold Sundays to avoid long waits in the telephone booth in my college. And Yes, I didn't have my mobile phone yet. Phone bills got a little out of control in the first semester. I resorted to exploiting the email system. This was where I think, I got a little overboard. With the relatively zero capital requirement and absolutely boring lectures, I started sending 4 to 5 emails every day with a custom written, well thought out strategies to impress her. A very big mistake indeed. I should have just been myself. Blame it on the madness called Love. It not only makes you blind, but deaf, mute and lame as well.

The average number of responses from her to the average number of emails I had sent to her was retreating to near zero levels. Considering the ratio over weeks and months was even more depressing. This took a big toll on my affinity towards probability and statistics. From the email statistics I had, the probability that she would respond to my email was more or less a big zero. Terribly depressing math. I went to the extent of avoiding the probability and statistics class as best as I could. I even worked hard to make the lowest grade in such elementary course. I did succeed. I was the lowest in the entire class. Quite a thing to be proud of!!! Felt like I had defeated the idea of probability.

Anyways, the harsh truth was, she had stopped responding to emails. She was gradually avoiding my calls. I could only comprehend the fact in retrospection. May be she was finding my emails irksome. It must have been quite a pain for her to clean her Inbox. I have been dumping her inbox with trite forwards about friendship calculators, forward-to-5-people to achieve your dream, blah-blah, boo-boo and some other similar crap. May be, she just found me boring. Distance and separation does have an impact. May be she found some thing else interesting. Some one better.. may be. The thought was depressing as it had a fairly high probability. Damn that stupid math again.

Slowly, as months passed by, maturity and ego caught up with us. I would wait around 2 weeks for her to call me. But, I didn't mind to be defeated. Mostly she would never call me. She never did. I would call her back and have a fairly monotonous discussion with out having any clue as to what we should be talking about. Having been separated physically has it's own toll. I was really in a hopeless position to assume that she was still the girl at school. But, every phone call was a proof that she had moved away. There was no "Me too" replies coming any more for my "I miss you" dialogues.Amidst all this, I complicated the affairs by proposing to her in the most unappealing manner.

May be it was just the hormones. We were no more in the teens to feel the rush. We both became more formal and slowly the memories of the past looked irrelevant. In the mean time, alcohol and cigarettes kept me busy as I introspected over the possible reasons for her change. The long lonely walks to the "Ganga" restaurant in our college campus was the most liberating experience. A smoke and a coffee there made me a profound thinker. I had even named the tree beside, as my bodhi tree.It indeed was and helped me discover the young psychiatrist in me. Only thing, I could convince myself was, people eventually get bored of relationships.There was nothing more we could do. I kept on stalking her to understand me. I had adopted every possible tactic to convince her. Nothing helped. My love was hitting a straight abyss. I really could no longer believe that I could call my emotion as love. She was totally upset about this ordeal. I should have chosen a preferably auspicious time. I had the gut feel that we were certainly not made for each other. I couldn't convince myself otherwise.We stopped communicating. Silence was the greatest healer. I preferred best not to disturb her anymore.

I moved on. Her memories stayed. All those little moments of love and care.... All those little poems I wrote to her... All those every single thought of hers, stuck close to my heart for ever. Years rolled by. Professional life took over. For sure I guess she must have moved on too. She must certainly be having a great time. I thought so until I got a call from her few days back. It took me some time to convince myself that it was her. What a surprise!!!! But, there was a little stain in her voice. The voice was filled with the love and care from the very school days. The conversation went on for a few minutes exchanging pleasantries and the usual surprises. And as I interrupted her to ask, " How did you suddenly remember me?", Silence swept over the call. Then came the stark reply from her, "It is better to leave things as is .... than to dig them back. Let's leave it there. So, How about meeting tomorrow at the beach?"

Tomorrow had come. Driven by anxiety I had come in an hour before to the beach. I sat down on the sand by the beach side staring at a pebble washed away in the shore. I wondered about how on earth did this pebble land here.I was puzzled by my curiosity to unlock the mystery behind this bewitching pebble. I had never been distracted by a pebble captivating enough to overpower a transcendental sunset at the beach. But still, Here I was, sitting and staring at the pebble.

THE WORD

2011-03-13T10:43:00.000-07:00

Brahman is the word.Different people call it by different names but the truth is the same. Plato called it "The Good", Immanuel Kant called it "The transcendental thing-in-itself", Christ called it "Father in Heaven", Mohammedans called it "Allah", Buddhists called it "True nature", Schopenhauer called it "Will", Jung called it "Collective Unconsciousness" and so on.....

The truth remains one. The quest to find out the true nature of the self has been the fundamental factor churning out theories and practices of all kind. As a theory, it is called philosophy and when diluted and put in to practice, it takes the shape of religion. Religion romanticizes the absolute truth. Literature develops an affair with religion. Man and thoughts are by-products.

I met Selva and Vinay at the coffee day and went on to have a hearty discussion on science, philosophy, religion, ideas, failures, progress, destiny, free will and truth. Selva is a budding film maker and Vinay is a senior engineer at Schlumberger. We ordered for coffee, some shakes and some cookies to keep us company.

The problem with intellectuals is as they pity the ignorance of the world and the world pities them for their eccentricity. There are always two sides to a coin. If one is eccentricity, the other is Genius. Nevertheless, that does not stop the intellectual from ruthlessly pursuing to crack the toughest and weirdest questions on planet earth and beyond.

Carl Gustav Jung, A great philosopher and psychiatrist, quotes in his notes that, to explore others, he had to explore himself. To explore himself, he had to let himself loose to allow the unconditional flow of details deep from him unconscious. It even led him to a nervous breakdown. Such is the ruthless pursuit that the man does not stop until the reason is realized, mind is convinced and heart at peace.

Immanuel Kant, a great German Philosopher, went on a total silence for 11 years thinking about the nature of justice and morality to come up with his finest work, "Critique of Pure reason". In which, he quotes, that the truth is absolute and hence must be transcendental in nature. Our logic and reason are limited by space and time and hence to reach absolute truth, one must go beyond logic and reason and hence look beyond perceptions created by space and time." All said, he has squeezed his brain enough to arrive at those statement and he passed away due to Brain hemorrhage. His ideas of transcendental nature of truth is applied to justice and has helped governments frame their law with best possible justice done to Kant's ideas.

The biggest issue with some philosophy books are, they start with Socrates and Plato. But Before even, forefathers of Socrates got into a relationship, some of the greatest legends had already pondered over the nature of self and has documented the same as poetry and literature. It was called Vedas and Upanishads and India has been the bedrock of the eternal civilization, accentuated by Sanadhana Dharamam. Sanadhana Dharmam is a way of life. It charts out a crafted path for people of different receptive levels to gradually rise to the godly state.

In the middle of a tumultuous period, when men were fighting amongst themselves in the name of god and interpreting their own version of truth to achieve selfish results, A great philosopher Saint called Adi Shankara realized the responsibility to clarify the truth. He gave his thesis and interpretations of vedas and upanishads and charted out "Shanmadham" which accommodates different people with different beliefs to identify themselves as one and equal. Shri Adi Shankara preached and practiced the philosophy of Advaita which simply reflects the real nature of self. The summary of his idea is given in Vivekachudamani as follows,

"Brahma satyaṃ jagat mithyā, jīvo brahmaiva nāparah — Brahman is the only truth, the world is an illusion, and there is ultimately no difference between Brahman and individual self"

There is no good and bad. There is no right and wrong. There is no me and you. There is no leader and follower. There is no pleasure and pain. There is no virtue or vice. The man is no separate from the god. Nirvana Shatakam of Adishankara stands as the simplest and most poetic summary of the true nature of self. Similar realizations are found in all the religious fundamentals but unfortunately, they have been distorted to achieve their selfish means.

Does all this serve the thirst of the ruthless philosopher in pursuit of truth?. The simple answer is No. Not unless the truth dawns on him. Not unless, the philosopher tunes himself to be receptive enough to absorb the wisdom.

A senior fellow and guide of mine who is a very wise philosopher explains, "There are two sections to a plant. One is the root. One is the stems and leaves above. If we keep on sprinkling water at the stems and leaves, the plant will perish. One must water the roots." There are two important demands for the unrealized self. The brain and the heart. The brain by it's logic propels the curiosity and inquisitiveness of the philosopher and it goes on to the point unless the philosopher realizes the moment to shed his knowledge and absorb transcendental wisdom. Logic and reason can take you only so long to realize and convince the mind that, the real bliss and truth is transcendental and one needs to shed their ego [knowledge] to achieve wisdom and eternal bliss.

Immanuel Kant, Alan Watts and many other great westerners same so close to the Advaita philosophy and never realized nor convinced to shed the knowledge to arrive at the absolute truth. Kant died of Brain Haemorrhage and Alan watts committed suicide. Truth is too much for the sane. Our Mystics took the path of the heart. Shri Adi Shankara attained Videha Mukthi at a young age of 32 years. He had given us content and ideas which cannot be read, grasped and understood in a life time. Such is the rule that one should acquire knowledge and gradually take assistance of a spiritual guru to attain wisdom and Bliss.

This does not mean every body should do complex yogas and take to Sanyasa. There are certain responsibilities associated with each phase of life. Sanadhana Dharma outlines them very clearly and it applies even to the current world. The beauty is it's ability to accommodate different beliefs and practices and still upholding Dharma. Unfortunately I do not find such wide acceptance in any other religion or philosophy in the history of man kind.

With the latest achievements in Science and Technology, we are able to look at the galaxies that are million light years away and also look at atoms and sub atomic particles that is constant flux of creation and annihilation. My curiosity started with the realization that Man is a social animal and how did we end up here where we are today. I took the path of scientific reason to find out the dots plotted in the line of history that will eventually take me to the origin.

Science, as I rigorously pursued at the cosmic and the quantum scale, stopped at time = 0. Big Bang is described as cataclysmic accident due to the loss of balance between constant equilibrium between creation and annihilation. As Creation sped up or annihilation slowed down, the pure energy manifested itself into space and time and hence on has been ever expanding. The expanding nature of universe was never known to science until early 1920s and only when Hubble published his observation, the world was shocked to know the the world is ripping itself off. Scary stuff! Science called it an accident. Our Eternal Indian philosophers called it an event with a purpose. They were called as accidents and purposeful events for the same reason. It was simply due to the low probability of such an event.

All the rules and laws that govern the state of the universe breaks down at t=0. As Per science, before Bing Bang, there was neither space nor time. According to Vedas, this is an unending cycle of prakriti [pure energy] manifesting as space and time and later re-synthesize itself as pure energy again. The truth suggested in vedas is not reason out the beginning and end or the cause for the same but to comprehend that the changes are transient and impermanent. For truth is absolutely transcendental, it is imprudent and unwise to associate it with the changes. Searching for the reason for the change, deviates us from realizing the purpose.

Go with the flow and accept the change. Realize the impermanent nature of evolution and the superior purpose to re-synthesize into the pure energy and pure consciousness.

Quantum Mechanics is built upon the basic and fundamental assumption that electrons move around the nucleus randomly. The assumption is holding true so far. But, When did the electron come and say to any one that it selects its next position randomly. If at all it decides to tell, a scientist is the last person it would prefer to tell. For obvious reasons of course! That said, probabilistic notions are good to keep the ideas flowing and moving. It is an acceptance of human inability to deterministically predict the flow of events but not to be understood that nature behaves in a random way and we understand its random behavior in the light of probability and statistics.

So, Do we have free will? No. How can we? We are such insignificant cosmic dust. And those who had realized the eternal truth, adorn silence. Because, the truth when tried to be described loses its meaning. It is by nature indescribable. The closest our language could do was refer it is "Brahman, transcendental truth, the good, the will, the thing in itself and etc..". That's the closest we can get to.

Free will is a perceived notion of control. Though it is comforting to believe in it, the fact stands otherwise. As we try to grasp the incomprehensibly evolutionary nature of universe, there is little that our logic can help us when we ask questions starting with "Why". To quote Gita, Though we are responsible for the effort, the path is predetermined and predetermined does not mean that the path is predictable by Humans. It is still complex to understand the true nature of duty and responsibility in the light of destiny and free will but all the great philosophies recommend us to be focused on the internal call, the path of the heart. Even a slight deviation from it, causes misery and pain. The effort from our side is to try best to follow our heart. All virtues of morality and goodness is automatically ingrained when one pursues that faithful path with conviction. The maturity and state of mind to follow the path with just faith to hold on is the sign of wisdom awaiting to descend on him. The rest is indescribable. This makes The GURU, indispensable to guide the inquisitive Sishya to ensure that the path leads to fruition.

How will one know his purpose? I would like to conclude with a beautiful poem by T.S.Eliot, "Little Gidding". The following lines summarize the nature of purpose and one's call.

And what you thought you came for
Is only a shell, a husk of meaning
From which the purpose breaks only when it is fulfilled
If at all. Either you had no purpose
Or the purpose is beyond the end you figured
And is altered in fulfilment.

The purpose is waiting to be discovered and is not comprehensible unless it is achieved. Something similarto the Schrodinger's cat problem in Quantum mechanics.

Thoughts and discussion bring clarity. Remembering the story of "Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho, The Traveler in search of treasure becomes the alchemist and once he becomes the alchemist he finds resonating with nature. That oneness is the purpose. That bliss is the purpose. How and when it will happen to any one is beyond any body's control. If it is destined to happen at some point in time, there is nothing any body can do about it. There is a universal cadence. We are so mortal that we fail to listen to the tune. As rightly said,

"And those who were dancing were thought to be fools by those who can't listen the music"

- Fredrich Nietzche

Thanks for the opportunity, Selva and Vinay for making me summarize a lot of thoughts and ideas that I have been reading and thinking about. First, we claim that our thoughts are ours, then we realize that we are just the medium through which thoughts flow and ultimately truth descends on us that we are neither the thoughts, nor the medium and nor the words. We are beyond subjective notion and objective reality.

"Chidaanandha Roopa, Shivoham Shivoham"

- I am the eternal truth, pure bliss and consciousness.

Azure on Top

2011-02-28T22:47:00.000-08:00

CloudSleuth is a community that extends beyond the borders of any single organization. This community of cloud-based companies and experts provides information, resources and hands-on solutions regarding the best practices, blueprints and tools for the cloud.

In a recently published study by CloudSleuth, they have the run the Gomez Last mile tests to evaluate various cloud service providers. They have used the average last mile response time in seconds as a parameter to evaluate the quality of cloud service across the globe.

They have also mentioned the use of Global Provider View to compare and analyze various IaaS and PaaS service providers.

For technical details of performance chart and listing of other players - Refer the Cloudsleuth page.

Way to go, Azure.!!

Monologues

2011-02-21T09:00:00.000-08:00

Category: Short Story

I woke up to an unusually special morning.It was unusual as I had never felt this poetic and special because I had a really good dream. As I lay with my eyes half-open, I could see the sun rays had briskly penetrated into my room through the window. They were romancing with the random dust and were driving them crazy. I saw that the particles were running around in joy as the light continued to scatter them hither and thither. I tried hard to maintain the ambient silence but I had to wake up. "Should I really?", I questioned myself.

It had been some years since my last walk to catch the 8am bus to mark my attendance at work. I had felt School was horrible. But, Work was terrible. I was eventually left with no option other than to opt a less committed life. It was a natural decision for me to resign. To my luck, I had a good inheritance of around 50 acres of cultivable land in my village. Since then, Agriculture has taken care of me and I focused on writing stories. It was not that I was passionate about stories but just that I tried painting and it didn't work.

I am not too old to be married and committed but just around that age to be looking for having a relationship. I preferred to take the bus to visit my agricultural land once in a week. I wore a rugged dhoti with a loosely tied shirt and so the breeze can freely breath in between the shirt and my skin. I always took the long archaic umbrella used by my grand pa and tied a turban around my head with a towel, the one with the deer painting on it. Initially, all this attire seemed so disconnected for an engineering graduate taken to farming, but slowly I fell in love with this persona of mine.

I was addicted to the long lonely walks down the pathway filled with Hibiscus. It was impossible not to be swept away by the lovely lilies and Majestic Lotus popping their heads out of tranquil ponds. The inverted mountains seem so real in the pristine water pools that it would make a fool out of engineering graduates. I loved being a fool before nature's such magnificence. As a pay off for being consciously ignorant, I traded good poems and stories from her.

I started off for the day. Today seemed different. I sensed an excitement in my heart. It was beating at a unusually higher rate. There was mystery in the air. I took every step with great caution. I have heard stories of free spirits that roam by the country side. As I had stayed long enough and had become so close to nature, I didn't rule out one such possibility. In addition, it was a full moon day. It was natural phenomenon that full moons and no moons influence human psyche. There was certainly some thing in store.

I had to enter the notorious river walk known for it's occult and mystical events. All this years, I had never bothered even for a second to cross this place. I still couldn't figure out why today was chosen to haunt me. My speed increased. I felt there was some thing behind, pushing me forward. Gradually, as I kept walking at an ever increasing speed that I really couldn't figure out if I was walking or running. I kept eyes on my foot as I was scared of slipping and falling into the river from the pathway. As I looked up to check the path ahead, I was petrified to see a middle aged lady with stunning looks standing close to my chest. Before I could wonder where did she crop up from, I saw myself fainting down and her hand was holding me.

I could distinctly hear the sound of her anklets with every foot step she took.I never believed the villagers when they warned me of the spirit of "Mohini" around the river path. For once, the rumors were true. It had to be the spirit. This peculiar spirit had a pattern. It was generally known to appear as a seductive lady, force the male victims to mate and then kill them in a gory manner. No wonder, this day felt so poetic. For death is the most beautiful journey. My only worry was that the villagers would find my body nude. Nevertheless, I would have had the experience of a life time copulating with "Mohini". In any case, death is final. I was resolved to enjoy the process! I could think no longer and my eyes closed.

My eyes half open, I was leaning on to her bosoms. She was sitting by my side waiting for me to wake up from my frenetic slumber. It was dark in the evening and I could distinctly hear the cricket's sound. The full moon was blazing and the waves in the river rustled with passion. I was filled with freshness after the tired sleep. I admired Mohini for her etiquette to wait for me to wake up from sleep. I was all set and ready. And so, I looked into her eyes. To my surprise, I found her equally baffled as I was.

Every victim was given the opportunity to present his soliloquy before his final call. I wanted mine to be short and sweet. I derived inspirations from all the nature around.As I went on to speak, I saw her scribbling my lines on the sand and title it monologues. As I was in no mood to prolong my destiny. I grabbed her by her hips and kissed her so fervently on her lips. She resisted and yielded after a few seconds. The eye contact flung a thousand paintings in my heart. As I relaxed a little bit, She pushed me away and tied me to the tree.I was handcuffed tightly onto the lowly hanging branch.

As the Jasmine smell flowed all around, I saw her walking towards me. She was divinely seducing and all the more haunting. As she came close to my heart in the same position as she took me away. she hugged me to her heart. I felt her canines tasting my nerves around the neck. I could smell my blood and the sweet kiss of death.

I woke up to a very casual morning. I felt a little perplexed. It was already 7am in the morning and I have to rush to catch my 8am bus to work.I got ready and went over to pick up my diary. I was baffled to see that I had scribbled "What is life on earth if not for relishing such beauty!" and had titled it Monologues. I spent a couple of weeks trying to understand what would have made me write such a line in deep slumber! I convinced myself that it was all due to the monotonous life style and complete disregard for the man with in! I felt I belonged to the country side. Given an option, I would have taken to Agriculture. Wish I had some property in my name! The beautiful pathways filled with hibiscus, transcendental mountain views, Lovely lilies and Majestic Lotus popping their heads out of Pristine water pools! "What is life on earth if not for relishing such beauty!"

I boarded my bus and was off to work.

CloudCamp@Chennai - My take away

2011-02-21T01:24:00.000-08:00

CloudCamp is an unconference where early adopters of Cloud Computing technologies exchange ideas. One such discussion was held at Chennai on Feb 19th, 2011.

It was very informative from a knowledge perspective and productive from a business networking perspective. The major sponsors were IBM, Troppo, OrangeScape, Trillion systems, Netmagic, Microsoft and CSS corp. The presentations were more of marketing pitch for the respective sponsors. But, they didn't have people from different verticals to actually benefit from all the talks. Mostly students were present to whom all this talk and discussion was mostly irrelevant. In this article, I would like to provide brief summary of people I met, talks I attended and ideas that I exchanged.

Cloud camp kickstarted off with "Cloud Intro" by Larry Carvalho, RobustCloud. This topic was quite familiar to most of the professionals there but was received with overwhelming response by the student crowd. Of the 400 registrations, 33% had approximately turned around. Pune and Delhi conferences had better participation.

We had a good panel of Cloud camp organizers.
1. MS Janaki Ram - From Amazon [ He was earlier one among the senior developers of Microsoft Azure]
2. Niraj Bhutt - From Microsoft [ Representing Azure Services on the cloud ]
3. Mani Doraisamy - From OrangeScape [ Visual PaaS/ Cloud platform agnostic application development ]
4. Subba Iyer - Professor, SP Jain Institute of Management
5. Senior Director of Cloud Services, IBM
6. Senior Member, NASSCOM

Post the introductory session, Larry asked the audience to bring out questions on cloud. The questions were mostly based on the following topics.

*) Cloud standards
*) Compilance and Security
*) Billing/Chargeback
*) Capacity planning in the cloud
*) Cloud Platform/Cloud options

I was so happy to meet up and talk in person with MS Janaki Ram whose blogs provided me insightful understanding of Microsoft Azure. But, I was a little surprised to know that he had moved on the Amazon. Nevertheless, I requested him to continue writing and share his knowledge on dots connecting Cloud, Big Data, Map/Reduce, Business Intelligence. He shared his ideas on how the cloud is taking shape, and how it can add value to business.

He explained how capacity planning can be done flexibly in the cloud. Dynamic scaling and elasticity allows the user to plan capacity on demand.

Netmagic, who were hosting service providers are moving into IaaS. Naturally, that is an option they have got. The UI and demo looked good enough with all the properties required for an IaaS vendor. I found it a little interesting as their pricing denomination was in Indian Rupees. The plan must be cross checked with other vendors like Amazon to compare the cost advantage.

I primarily raised queries on compliance and charge back. Compliance guidelines can be met by choosing the region of hosting and defining the appropriate SLAs with the cloud vendor. Charge back provides insight in to billing details and gives the right information about resource utilization in the cloud. For example, In a private cloud scenario, it is important to know how much each department with in an organization used and the corresponding amount of money can be charged back against each department.

Mani discussed in length about Performance, Scalability and Management in the cloud. This topic led us into the need for cloud monitoring, management and governance tools to provide the necessary insight. How good is good enough in cloud remains an elusive question. Cloud standards are evolving and cloud is still in it's hype stage. It is slowly being put into test with reality by early adopters and CIOs interested to evaluate a new option.

Subba Iyer claimed vociferously about Microsoft dragging it's feet in Azure platform and the scope of the PaaS offering. He acknowledged that cloud is here to stay but the initial hype will be worn off and new normal to accept.

Niraj from Microsoft Azure, shared a video on how Azure datacenters and other microsoft cloud solutions are built.

I had a lunch discussion with senior executive from Trillion and IBM. Going forward, the user will have a visual pattern or work flow to follow through and get his tasks done. Application installation and configurations were made simpler using wizards in the past. In the cloud, Visual workflows will guide the user to provision, monitor, manage services in the cloud.

I had a brief discussion with Subba Iyer post his thoughts on Azure and found his thoughts very profound.
"Making money is easy. But, sustaining it by adding value holds the key." So, Who ever adds value in whatever form to the end customer will lead the way!!

Vidiyalai Nokki - In search of a New Dawn

2011-02-07T07:41:00.000-08:00

This short film was made to create social awareness about need to point out the importance of imparting education to young children.

Parents must realize and focus on making sure in education of their kids.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwYL23DbPdk

This short film brings out the intrinsic curiosity of kids to learn amidst all situational constraints. Parents must help them get the right platform. If not help, at the least they shouldn't interfere negatively on the aspirations and ambitions of the kids.

Butterflies Fly

2011-02-07T07:37:00.000-08:00

My First Script based on Director's block - This won the prestigious award for Best Animated Short film in 24FPS National Film Festival. The Credit goes to Mayur Karthik, My friend and philosopher and G Karthik, the script writer for visually portraying my story.

http://shootingpeople.org/watch/film.php?film_id=81000

Andhaadhi - A Search and A Wait

2011-02-06T19:43:00.000-08:00

Based on a short Story [http://karthickhariharan.blogspot.com/2010/08/search-and-wait.html] I had written quite some time back,

Yeshwant Wrote the script and dialogues !
We had Aditya compose music for us and JayaKumar do the camera !

Hari, Sriimathy and Mr. Ranganathan played the roles!

Andhaadhi is a form of poem where the last word of a stanza is the same as the first word of the next stanza. Our protagonist's journey starts with a wait. This wait ends in a search. The search again ends in a wait. Will this wait again end in a search?

http://vimeo.com/19628645

Comments are welcome...

Week End Productions presents "Andhaadhi".....

Karthick

Jesus lived in India - Notes from book by "Holger Kristen"

2010-12-30T09:30:00.000-08:00

Fools! For I also had my hour;
One far fierce hour and sweet:
There was a shout about my ears,
And palms before my feet.

GK Chesterton - in his poem - The Donkey.

In the poem, The donkey is very proud to have had it's hour. Why is the Donkey proud? Why was a shout about it's ears and palms before it's feet? Palms before feet is put to welcome some one. Was any one traveling in the donkey. If yes, and he has been welcomed with a shout. Who was He ? He must have been a much awaited person.

He is none other than the revered mystic Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ was coming into Jerusalem from the east. We all know that Baby Jesus escaped the wrath of the then King and eventually came back to Jerusalem. It is this coming back which was pointed out in the poem above. So, where was he in the mean time? Between the escape and return to Jerusalem ? There are even historical evidences [ as quoted from "Jesus lived in India " by Holger Kristen ] that Jesus had his spiritual enlightenment in the Himalayas and was groomed and guided by Buddhist monks. So, the line of reasoning goes as follows.

* After the escape from the cruel Roman king, where did the baby Jesus go ? How did the baby and parents escape ? All we know of is, he comes back to Jerusalem in a Donkey after several years to spread the divine message.

As per Holger Kristen's research, he links those events with Buddhist philosophies and traditions. The story goes this way. Buddhists monks choose their Dalai lama in a peculiar way. The current lama, on his departure from earthly plane to higher plane, determines which direction to find the next lama. As the current lama attains peace, the direction in which his face is pointing to would be the direction in which the monks would go in search of their next lama. Not only that, they carry the possessions of the current lama. They also carry huge number of gifts for the Lama who will be discovered. The new lama would mostly be a young kid who would pick up the right set of previous lama's possession amidst several other similar items [ Like holy beads, staff etc].

Once the Lama in the east during Jesus birth attained peace, Three monks with huge gifts traveled looking for their next lama in the west direction [ based on the direction in which their previous lama's face was looking. ] They crossed middle east and stumbled upon this kid who rightly picked up the previous lama's possession. And the three Buddhist monks saved the kid and family cross the border with the wealth they had. Now remember the three kings in the Jesus Birth story ! Ok, what is that Star ? That was the brightest star - Sirius. The mythical belief of super natural events were generally supplemented with astronomical facts.

History has recorded that the kid was groomed in the Himalayas under the tutelage of Buddhist monks. Jesus was called Isha in Buddhist circle and from his preachings, it is evident that his idea of love and affection as the panacea comes directly from Buddha's preachings. History has recorded events of a mystic Isha visiting Places in india [ Currently regions of Orissa ] and saddened by the deep divide in people based on castes wrongly instituted by the then practitioners of Hinduism. Later came Adi Sankara to revive the beautiful Hindu Sanadhana Dharmam.

Now, Jesus/Isha was a very enlightened individual all set to spread the word of love and oneness to his home land. It is recorded in History that he took the help of Hindu King who ruled Kashmir then to travel back to home land of Jerusalem to spread the word of love and affection.

Then Jesus returns to Jerusalem and till crucifixion is history. Is it possible for a mystic to magically arise after being declared dead. As far as my intellect goes, nature surely doesn't allow that. But Nature does allow one beautiful state called "Unconsciousness". From Holger Kristen's book, I understand, Jesus had lot of sympathizers and followers in the Roman Army. The crucifixion scene from history has to be studied a little more in detail. Partially some of the clues lie in the mystery of Turin Shroud. But as it is debatable, I will not use that to supplement facts.

As Jesus was practicing yoga and had attained superior state of consciousness, it is possible to go into a deep state of trance even amidst violent pain caused due to crucifixion or naturally he became unconscious and was declared dead by his followers in Roman Army. History has recorded that the head in charge of execution was not there to verify the same when Jesus' body was placed into the new tomb post crucifixion. Holger kristen gives detailed account of his friends rescuing him from the tomb and that event is witnessed as the rise of Jesus after three days. The rise of Jesus after three days is also attributed to the beginning of spring, when Good Friday and Easter are celebrated.

It is also accounted that Jesus then moved to Kashmir helped by his friends, where he lived a blissful life spreading his message of love and affection and attained peace approximately at an age of 80. There is a tomb of Mary in Pakistan dating back to early ADs. There is another carved foot print available for observation which indicates marks of crucifixion. Crucifying was never practiced in the east at least not in Kashmir. So, it has to be of some one who was crucified and tomb was erected means he must have been a godly man.

It's convincing for me to accept that Jesus could have lived in India and in all sense the most logical history which I have read so far. My interest on Jesus comes from my kinder garden days. I was educated in a Christian school up till my 3rd grade in school and have always bothered to know where he was in the mean time between the escape and return. I have just explored and found out a relatively convincing historical evidence. This post is not to hurt any one's sentiments and it is only to have a record of my reading and thoughts.

The Sun God and the Heavens thereof...

2010-12-30T09:11:00.000-08:00

All the religions have astrological significances behind each and every celebration. It is not appropriate to condemn them as superstitious but reason out them and understand the beauty behind that and celebrate life. We are here to celebrate life for all the best and good reasons and not to discard and remain as a sober intellectual with only reason to hold onto. Understanding is essential and should supplement the auspicious celebrations. That adds value to life and that is what motivated me to research on the below topics.

Thanks to Bangalore Terrace Top Room where I stayed for around 2 years. I used to do my Sandhya vandanam [ Morning and Evening Prayers ] and stand facing the Sun to offer prayers. Being at the roof top, and as the prayers have to said at Sun Rise and Sun Set, gave me the opportunity to observe the motion of Sun more closely. The fact did not strike me right away. It took some seasons of the year to strike my consciousness gradually. I observed a pattern. The rising point of Sun varied with respect to seasons. The rising point of Sun is not the same during the course of the year. From Summer to Winter cycle [ 6 months ], The Sun's rising point moved Southwards and From Winter to Summer [ 6 months ], The Sun's rising point moved from the lowest point attained in South, towards north to the same place where it is supposed to be in Summer. All this is with respect to observation from the northern hemisphere and the events would be reversed if observed from southern hemisphere.

Quite a confusing idea. I checked about the same with my friends. My friends in Bangalore confessed that they haven't seen the sun rise or sun set in the last decade. Funny but true. At least, they have never observed such patterns.

I decided to dig further. I stumbled upon the "The Heliocentric Science" by Swami Abhedanandha and purchased it for Rs.20/- from Sri Ramakrishna Mutt book store. To my utter surprise and shock, I have observed which has been known to human kind even before 3500 BC. But, I said to myself that they didn't have the disadvantage of living in huge cities with tall buildings and no idea about Sun rise and Sun Set.

Some interesting points, I observed and understood are,

1.In Greece, Shepherds who used to drive and manage flocks in herds were the first set of people to observe that the heavens move. They identified clusters of stars and named the constellations based on the earthly activity that happens during that period. This is tropical astrology.
Eg : Aquarius meaning water bearer is observed during the rains which is a sign of down pours and redemption from winter. The Zodiacal names are tied to the seasons on earth.

There is another type called the Sidereal astrology. Hindu system follows this type and is based on the actual position of constellations and not based on the seasons like the tropical astrology. The negative point of tropical astrology is since the zodiac is aligned with seasons on earth, the facts are no more true. At some point in the past, during that constellation [ say Aquarius ] it had blossomed on earth and so, they had kept that respective zodiac name during that season on earth. It would not be correct to reversely say that when ever it blossoms/rains, Aquarius would be there in the sky. But that is what tropical astrology is.

Again, That doesn't leave sidereal astrology to be perfect. When I said, that the constellation wouldn't remain the same as assumed in tropical astrology, it implies that the heavens are moving and so are the constellations. What was true in 3000 BC when it blossomed may not be true now. The actual constellation during that time would have been Aquarius. But now, when it blossoms in the same place, it might be some other constellation. Why is this seen? What is this happening ?

This system of sidereal astrology takes into account the precession of Equinoxes. Hipparchus (190–120 BC) of Rhodes or Nicaea, a Greek astronomer is generally credited with observing the Precession but these documentations of various positions of stars and constellations is called "Panjaankam" in Tamil which was there in practice even before that time.

As the title says, "Precession of equinoxes", it is logical that the reference point was an equinox. In at around Hipparchus time, the vernal equinox was observed when Aries was the constellation in view. This can be observed from the picture above. Between, 1000 BC to 0, you could see Aries above in view. So when the vernal equinox was observed, Aries would have been the constellation in view.

Due to Earth's top like spinning around it's axis, The position at which the vernal equinox occurs is not the same. Every 70 years, there is a 1 degree change in position. That is every year, 1/70 degree change should be seen in the position at which the vernal equinox occurs. Since the change is very minimal, it is not noticed until a change in constellation itself changes.

So, the assumption in sidereal astrology is there are 12 zodiacs and each zodiac takes 30 degrees. And so, for covering one zodiac, it takes 30 degrees x 70 [ years ] = 2100 years. Approximately every 2100 years, the equinox moves on to the next constellation. This assumption is very approximate as not all constellation can be assumed to cover an equal 30 degree. So, For the precession through all 12 zodiacs, 12 x 2100 = 25,200 Years. Then the whole cycle repeats...

Ayanamsa - Precession value in Indian system is accounted for in the Hindu traditional log book "panchaankam" and is used for marking auspicious and reserved days.

2. Indian nomads and mystics had observed similar patterns and by the time others are trying to come up with names and signs for constellations, Indian mystics [ tamil saints ] like Idaikaadar, Agasthiyar were experimenting and coming up with influences of cosmos on earthly existence.

3. Sun was the early man's elixir. They were frightened by darkness as it made them incapable of defending themselves against ghastly attacks. Survival was under threat in the cover of darkness. In the Egyptian myth, Horus was their god who fought against darkness every day to bring light in the morning. [ For you Quizzers : That one eyed hero whom you see in the dollar note !] Similarly various cultures had different gods representing Sun. It was one such prayer I was uttering in my prayers too.

4. Now, the question of season arises. The seasons are due to the axial tilt of the earth against the plane of revolution around the sun. The amount of Sun light falling on surface of earth varies based on the tilt. It's for the same reasons, in the poles there will be six months of day and six months of night. So, for the planets with no axial tilt, there are no seasons.

5. Now, the most important question of movement of Earth around the sun and the Earth's revolution plane with respect to the plane of the universe [ Ecliptic ].

As you see in the diagram, the yellow ellipse is the plane of the Earth formed as a continuous extension of the Equator infinitely. The Ecliptic [ Ellipse indicated in red in the left diagram and shaded in blue in the right diagram] is the Plane in which the Sun is observed as moving around the earth [ from the point of view of Earth ]. So, what is the consequence ?

From my understanding, it is due to this angular difference between the plane of earth's equator [ Celestial equator ] and Plane of Sun's path observed from Earth [Ecliptic] is the root cause of different rising points of sun with change in seasons.

6. The picture clearly indicates Equinoxes and solstices.Equinoxes are When the Ecliptic and Celestial Equator cut each other, the positions of Sun is right above equator. Consequence of Equinox - Equal day and Equal night.

7. When the Sun is in the farthest position of the Ecliptic from the Earth, i.e. in the above picture, the left most and right most points of the Ecliptic, that is when a solstice is observed. Summer solstice is the longest day and Winter solstice is the longest night. [ One such Summer solstice opportunity was used Eratosthenes, Greek Mathematician to figure out the circumference of Earth ]

So, by observation we have got four important positions. Summer Solstice, Winter Solstice, Spring Equinox, Autumnal Equinox. These four positions define proximity and extreme positions of Earth and Sun. So, how is the earth rotating and revolving around the sun ?

The answer is it is spinning like a top around the sun. Refer to the picture below.

In addition to the rotation and revolution, the spinning/rotation is like that of a top spinning around it's axis. This resulted in the precession of equinoxes.

So, What is the immediate consequence of earth spinning like a top? Shakespeare was wrong.!

He had written that Caesar will not change his mind like that of Northern star [ Pole star ] which doesn't change it's position.!

"I am constant as the Northern star,
of whose true-fix'd and resting quality:"

Pole star is where the Earth's Axis [ Celestial poles ] passes close to a star. Due to the Earth's spin like a top observed, the axis shifts it's position slowly but surely away from the pole star. What might be the pole star now, may not be the pole star after say 2000 years, as the axis would have moved and would be more closer to some other star. For example, Thuban which was the pole star in 3000 BC is not the pole star now. Now, we have polaris as the pole star. Polaris is by itself is a misleading name assuming that would be the constant pole star.

Interesting fact is we knew that Thuban was the pole star in 3000 BC by reverse engineering as well. In Egypt, some specific observatories were constructed to view the northern/pole star. If view from those observatories, we would see Thuban and not Polaris.

Let's take a more closer look. There are 12 zodiac signs. Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces.

If you look at the Zodiac, 360 degrees are separated into 12 zones [ each 30 degrees ]. That 12 zones can be grouped as 4 different quarters [ each 90 degrees ]. They are Quarter of Love, Quarter of Wisdom, Quarter of Wealth and Quarter of labor. Each quarter is understood to have a specific consequence on the earthly minds. In Early Hindu practices, it is understood that birth in respective quarter of zodiacs determined the nature of profession one would be "naturally" good at.

For example, a child born in quarter of labor would be extremely good with respect to physical strength, especially in the legs. He would fit to do tasks that involve intense labor. For a child, born in quarter of wisdom, would be natively intelligent and would seek the truth with wit and intellect and so on. But, Later, this was wrongly misinterpreted and followed as a caste system and When the elders said that one's profession is influenced by one's birth [ based on the quarter of zodiac was implied], it was wrongly followed as one's hereditary. It has been since now followed that if the father is a Sudra, the son also has to be a sudra. This is wrong. If the father was born during the Quarter of Labor, He would have been best efficient for intensive labor tasks. But that is not an imposed restriction. But, it is just an understanding that naturally with the support of heavens he would be good at labor. But, If his son was born in Quarter of wisdom, He would naturally be supported by heavens to be an intellectual thinker. Note that, these do not have supportive scientific facts. With Statistics over a long time, we can show that there are enough possibilities for cosmological influence on human mind, but I am not sure if that can be called science.

Okay, Coming back to rotation and revolution of earth, By observation, one can understand that the plane on which the earth is revolving is slightly tilted and forms a 23.5 degree angle with the Ecliptic. From the autumnal equinox to the winter solstice, the sun moves south wards until reaching the winter solstice [ Longest night ] . After winter solstice, the sun climbs back on the plane to go to the vernal equinox.

If you see the above phenomena from the northern hemisphere, it would look like the Sun is drowning slowly below the horizon. Imagine thousands of years back, when the nomadic tribes whose only means of survival dependent upon the health of Sun, seeing it collapsing into the horizon slowly. [ The period from Autumnal equinox to Winter Solstice ]. And what a surprise, the Winter solstice happens and the sun starts moving northwards after a brief gap. This sun starting to move northward is very much celebrated in Indian Tradition as "Ratha Sapthami"

With all respect for the myth and religion, they all were given relevance to that particular date [ Most functions celebrated in this time period ] to instill the significance of resurgence of hope which matches with the sun starting to move north wards in the horizon. There were great mystics of their period and undoubtedly were altruistic and served the man kind and we marked their birth and enlightenment with this northward travel of Sun. Each and every structure of universe is so finely crafted that if not for such a geographical construct, Life would not have survived on earth. A minute yet very important observation in astronomy. This period is also very much devoted for spiritual purposes in India. Lots of Prayers and devotional festivals occur during this period from winter solstice to Spring Equinox.

This understanding of how sun and earth moves around each other and how man started celebrating life makes me wonder and how rightly pointed out by none other than Albert Einstein himself.

" The most incomprehensible thing about universe is that it is comprehensible."

Thanks All for the patient read.

With The Stars

2010-12-13T09:00:00.000-08:00

Category: Short Story

She said, "I can dance pretty well." I wasn't very much surprised about that. Her eyes were sufficient enough to disclose her fondness for art and culture. Dance would certainly suit her form and figure. " I learnt BharatNatyam while living abroad", She continued with an accent, " A subtle and intense form of expression. Isn't it?". She completed her statement with an interrogative which has only affirmative option as the answer. I wouldn't bother to deny her thoughts. At least, certinly not on a hill top, lost in the middle of some where, and just the stars and infinite darkness to gaze at.

We were lost in side a jungle. I, Karthick, am 27, married and love photography. Mrinalini, Recently returned from the United States of America, Should be younger than me and loves history. History and photography is such a wild combination. It's like the cotton and tobacco in a cigarette. Made for each other. We came in for a trek to the Venkatagiri hills near Tirupati. I had been trekking for a while in western ghats and was so amazed to find such untouched beauty in the eastern ghats of India. This was my first trek on the eastern mountain ranges of Indian Peninsula. We were a group of 25 while we started the trek.

As we progressed, the group got fractured and I was doing the honors of sweeping. Sweeping in trekking is a crucial test of one's patience. You are expected to make sure the tail and lagging end of the trekkers kept up the pace and followed the trail. Above all, it suits with my interests in Photography. I can take more time to capture captivating beauty of the copiously rich and dense jungle. Mrinalini certainly was slow. I wouldn't say she was finding the trek difficult but just that she took so much time for observation and appreciation. She shared voluminous history of peculiar trees and flowers with me. In return, I struck a deal to take a couple of photographs of her. The fascination about the refreshingly splendid flora was reflected in her expressive gestures. Even though we were meeting for the first time, surprisingly we had perfect understanding. We exchanged good number of jokes, intellectual debates on the pursuits of German philosopher Immanuel Kant, Romantic thoughts of Shakespeare, the simplicity of RK Narayan, the mysticism of Adi Shankara, the malfeasance of corrupt Indian bureaucracy and legends like Saint Thyagaraja, Akira Kurosawa, Satyajit Ray, Stanley Kubrick. Last but not the least, I was so stunned and surprised that she shared the highest regard for Tamil composer Maestro IllayaRaja, just like me.

I was engrossed in my intellectual discussions with her. In addition, she was also imbibed into appreciating and noting down the details of variety, abundant in the forest. Yet another paralyzing combination to lose the trail in a trek. Rightly said, we indeed lost track at a point from which there was no trace of any path. As soon as we stood there wondering which direction to take, I realized that we were lost. We had already walked 7 hours and as per the plan, the planned camp is around 11 hours from starting point. Indeed a long and tiring trek.

I summoned my previous experience of trekking to help us out here. My intuition said there might be at maximum, 2 ridges and 5 streams to cross. I remembered the details vaguely from the route plan. Neither did I have the GPS nor the route plan to verify my instincts."How do we go?", She questioned with the strong belief in me. It was already getting darker and there is no way I can affirm our status. I confessed, "We are lost.!". May be she was prepared for an occasion like this. She casually brushed aside the fact that we were lost and quoted "Rightly said by Korzybski, 'The map is not the territory'. Let's find a place to camp tonight". That idea seemed logical.

We walked a few kilometers through the thorny bushes and by luck we stumbled upon a relatively flat land with good grass to take rest. It was around 7pm and it was pitch black dark. We collected a few dry wood and put up the campfire. What a romantic night, right in the middle of jungle, tucked up and far away from the annoying lifeless life ! I wished my wife was with me at that very moment. Is it the jungle? Is it the camp fire ? Or Is it the girl with me? I guess Mrinalini would have wished for her boyfriend to be with her. I suppose she had one. My imagination suggested that he would be some one who has a cool bike and drives at crazy speeds in a busy traffic and if my guess is right, he would be addressing her "Hey, Babe".

I looked at her and in a soft and soothing tone called, "Hey, babe". Bursting into laughter, she replied jovially, "Well, well, That was romantic. But not as romantic as my boy friend calls me." So, I was indeed right. I replied "My wife finds my romance good enough. I must be content then." We both laughed at the irony of that sentence. We had some buns and chocolates to eat. She was talking in detail about her interests in arts and how she convinced her parents to let her come to India to learn dance. She proudly declared that she can dance pretty well. Looking at my incredulous gesture, She picked her mobile, selected a song from her playlist and asked me to play it when she is ready to dance. She added that it's a song about her boy friend.

As the song played, she gently moved her features to convey the essense of the song. I couldn't differentiate if the song was so immersing or her elegant dance steps that has dissolved me. A transfixing experience. The song was a devotional song on Lord Krishna and Gopikaas requesting him to come down to them. I was drowned in her charisma when Mrinalini depicted that she was calling the lord who has the bright face, blemish-less as the full moon to come running to her. I cursed her bewitching eyes. She had completed her performance and cool breeze swept over to signal nature's acknowledgement.

She came and sat next to me. I was still engrossed in her magnetic appeal. With the light from the campfire lighting her face selectively, she was inviting. A tumultuous moral battle has sprung in my mind and was taking a strong hold. I was torn between the ethical issues and natural instincts of love. She was not yet out of the influence of the song on lord Krishna. She went on glorifying the mystical lover boy, "Oh! Krishna should have been a lucky chap. So many longing for his presence and love." As she was revealing her passion for Krishna, I could not deny myself and leaned over to plant a gentle kiss on her cheek.

Love is a momentary madness and we don't realize it unless the moment passes. One such moment just crossed me and instilled the most disruptive silence I had experienced in my life. I was terribly stuck with guilt. The wood burnt a little larger to exaggerate the anger in her face. I shouldn't have exercised an unwarranted liberty. Her silence made the situation worse. I could see tears rolling down her eyes down through her cheek healing the wounds of my sin. She never spoke a word. She went a little away and laid down curling herself into the sleeping mat. I felt hopelessly pathetic.

My voice filled with remorse, pleaded to her for excuse. I condensed all my regrets and put it in to one word, "Sorry". There was no response from her. I left the disturbingly violent silence to haunt me. The consternation in my mind was overbearing and I had to kneel down for its mercy. A good sleep was the only cure. I wished for one.

As I laid down, looking at the wilderness of the universe, A simple truth struck me. The sky jotted with patterns of stars revealed the insignificance of human existence. Yet, the human remained an egotist and self centered social animal. The self centric, possessive, guilty Man on earth and the subtle, silent and the modest infinite universe all above him. Who are we, nothing but cosmic dust. Men and intellect was always ruled by women and beauty. Tiredness of the trek over took me and I fell asleep. I wished we lost our memories during the sleep so that we could start a day afresh and new. May be that's why the earth rotates every day giving us fair chance to move forward, shedding the garbage of memories collected every day. The cold breeze continued it's melody with the stars echoing the song for which Mrinalini had danced.

Head in clouds - Part 6 - Information as a service

2010-11-25T21:59:00.000-08:00

I had written a brief summary of Microsoft’s research paper on “Economics of the cloud” . The summary talked about the various economies of scale which influences and justifies cloud as an appropriate business option. The paper highlighted various options in cloud like Infrastructure, Platform and Software as services and private and public cloud options.

In this post, I would like to explore how data and information will take it’s place in the cloud. This “Information/Data as a Service” is not new. It has been provided by big Social/Economic/Environmental Research firms and government bodies. But, the way, variety and ease with which it will be obtained will be redefined in the cloud.

Microsoft recently announced it’s Azure DataMarket, an online platform for purchasing data from commercial data providers and public data sources, such as data sets on demographics, financials, retail, weather, and sports. Later you can process/work on the data and use it in your pages as per the terms and conditions. A peek into the Mobile world or the cloud world, we can readily understand that people have started processing data and sharing information in a huge scale.

Information as a service will give a professional touch to the unstructured data flooding across the world wide web. More streamlined, More focused, authoritative data can be obtained as a service. There will be lot more Data Markets which will offer wide variety of data from various sources.

There will be constraints and limitations posed by the vendor who supplies the data.With this feature in place, data and information will be made readily available to the developer and user once the respective services are subscribed to. This feature will address the thorny issue of Data integration which is prevalent in the independent traditional solutions.

Head in Clouds - Part 5 - Economics of the cloud

2010-11-23T00:40:00.000-08:00

I had briefly discussed about compliance and management. Microsoft recently published a paper on the “Economics of the cloud”. In this blog, I would like to summarize and highlight the core features of the paper and thereby also list the parameters that the Microsoft team took to evaluate the cloud.The paper is a very objective work on the economics of the cloud and purely targeting on the underlying concepts. The paper starts with the idea of cars introduced as ‘horseless carriages’. The horseless carriage perception was essential to carry forward and encourage people transition to cars. The same way, this paper’s main objective is to help build a framework, that allows IT leaders to plan for the cloud transition.

Little bit of History :
The mainframes were huge centralized systems, highly optimized for efficiency due to the high cost. Then came the advent of PC’s, minicomputers etc which lead to client/server architecture. The Client/Server architecture was designed and optimized for agility due to the low cost. Cloud Is a natural extension which is optimized for efficiency and agility.

This consolidation is very similar to that of Hybrid manufacturing set ups that evolved from Mass production and Just-In-Time production systems. The end result is efficacious delivery of results.

Economies of Scale :
The paper approaches from the demand side economies of scale, the supply side economies of scale and multi-tenancy economies of scale.

Supply Side Economies of Scale : Large Data Centers will lower the costs per server. The Cost of power, Infrastructure labor costs, security and reliability and purchasing power are the crucial parameters that determine the Supply side economies of scale.

Demand Side Economies of Scale : By Aggregating demand for computing and processing, the utilization of resources increase. On the demand side, it is the unpredictable factors that have to addressed to achieve economies of scale. The five sources of variability listed in the paper include, Randomness of user launching an application, Time-of-day patterns of the user, industry specific variability, Multi-resource [ CPU/Storage optimization] variability and most important of all, the uncertain growth patterns of the associated enterprise. By making use of the elastic nature of cloud computing and demand based events, the above factors can be controlled and handled more efficiently in a cloud scenario.

Multi-tenancy Economies of Scale : In a Multi-tenant application model, increasing the number of tenants will lower the application management and server cost per tenant. But, this also demands that the application hosted on the cloud should intelligent and capable enough to allow multi-tenancy. The cost of updating, maintaining and patching system/software also drastically comes down in a multi-tenant scenario.

Cloud Benefits :
The following image mentioned in the paper summarizes the benefits of cloud.

Concerns :
In the survey and analysis, security, governance and management will pose serious concerns to the decision maker. The end user has options of private and public clouds. The public cloud covers all the demand side economies of scale and addresses issues arising out of variability and unpredictability. But the private clouds give the user the security and control which he would demand for.

The most important point to observe is Private clouds are not just virtualized in house IT servers. The private clouds cater to the needs cutting across various departments in an organizations.

The paper also highlights that how the industry wide adoption of cloud is spread between private and public cloud options. The paper also predicts that the Academic, SMEs, IT enterprises will go on to adopt Public clouds aggressively and Government will preferably adopt private clouds for Security reasons.

Security and Compliance issues will slowly evolve to meet the growing demands and needs of the cloud adopters.

Head in Clouds – Part 4

2010-11-21T21:56:00.000-08:00

I had discussed the state of Security and Identity in the cloud. Now, comes the most essential and demanding feature of all. How do I ensure Compliance and Manage my products in the cloud ? After careful evaluation of cloud options, the end user adopts cloud strategy. But,how do I manage my products in the cloud? How do I make sure that the distributed data centers are functioning in compliance with the respective local laws ?

This is a very nascent topic and the clear cut process and ideas are beginning to evolve. Here we have two points, Compliance and Management.

Compliance :
I recently attended a geek meet in my locality. There was a discussion on Distributed computing. At the end of discussions, I suggested that “compliance” should also be covered under this topic. My suggestion was struck down categorizing Compliance as a Management subject than a technical one.

On introspection, I realize that Compliance is indeed a management topic but the cloud computing paradigm has pushed it into the technical arena as well. For an example, very recently, some governments demanded access to the data flowing across a mobile service providers’ database. The governments were seeking access to the encrypted data and demanding for compliance with their government norms.Hold!

Say the data centers in a cloud computing landscape are distributed all across the world and are holding confidential information. Is the data held, operations performed on the data, compliant with the rules and norms of the respective government. Apart from this, the idea of Corporate Social responsibility also crops in. How come does this topic of compliance become technical ? Yes. It does. What if my management framework or the cloud infrastructure can notify me about how compliant my products, data and operations are in various geographies!

Can the code become more knowledgeable to address issues of compliance and notify in case of discrepancy. I leave the future to answer to it. Can the products be designed to address the same ?

Management and Governance :
How good is good enough ? Having adopted a cloud strategy, the user might very well want to make sure if his strategy is indeed working

So, what are all the parameters that can be used to evaluate the cloud services? More in next blog.

Head in Clouds - Part 3

2010-11-16T19:35:00.001-08:00

I had written about various cloud options we have like Paas, Iaas, Saas etc. If you are a jargon freak, you can bother about Xaas. It’s nothing but a collective term to indicate ” Everything/Anything as a service”. Xaas can also include “Network as a Service”, “Monitoring as a Service”, “Communications as a Service” etc.

Now, I hope we agree that cloud has a lot of options, advantages. But there is a very big question that has not been taken yet. Security and Identity in the cloud is the crucial issue. In the usual architectures practiced and adopted, users are created and allocated responsible roles and access to applications/features are controlled and federated accordingly. But in the cloud, since it is a multi-tenant distributed computing architecture with users from various client simultaneously using their credentials to access and operate on data, it will be application that will grant access.

Eg: Facebook. You log in with your credentials using that application’s log in window. Once you are done, you sign out. Simultaneously multiple users would have logged in to the Facebook application from various geographies, accessed their data and would have signed out. So, it is the application that will control authentication/Identity. This is how cloud applications will be designed. In Future, Applications hosted in the clouds will communicate with each other via provided APIs and interfaces to share and send information. Log in credentials will be shared for access across a variety of applications. This presents a very big challenge.

In the usual case, you log in to a server/system. The system’s role based access control configuration will take care of authentication and identity.

Next comes, the problem of security. The authentication mechanism defines the quality of security. Security is a happening domain in Cloud computing. Every cloud vendor has taken a serious note and are consciously operating on to ensure secure and safe communication channels in and out of the cloud. If you notice the recent spate of acquisitions done by technology stalwarts, it can be classified into acquisitions of Data Center operations management vendors, Storage management, Security Software, Monitoring and cloud interoperability service providers.

Eg :

HP acquired Fortify, ArcSight Inc [ Both Security software providers ]

Intel acquired McAfee [ This was quite an interesting consolidation. ]

Dell buys Boomi [ Framework to securely conduct transactions between on-premises and cloud]

Google recently talked about their idea of security in the cloud.

Microsoft announced Azure Connect feature in their PDC 2010.

So, It is obvious that Security is certainly the top most concern in everyone’s mind. Every best possible step is taken to ensure the same. The new normal is being discovered. For example, Microsoft announced support for SQL Azure OData Service. OData is an emerging web protocol for querying and updating data over the Web. The way things are done are web are getting new definitions.

The ideas of security will also differ from how it can be implemented for a Private cloud and a Public cloud. A simple VPN connection to private cloud might work fine. But, In a public cloud, it is not possible. Add to on top of that, how do we enable single sign-on properties in the public cloud? Those are questions that are being actively pursued. [ Refer "Authentication in Cloud" for more info]

I would like to conclude this topic on security summarizing that security is constantly improvised and various avenues and new normals are discovered to establish a standard procedural structure for authentication in and for the cloud.

Well, How do we know that the application in the cloud is working well ? How do we manage stuff ? Say, I want to use Azure. Where do I start ? How do I deploy, manage, govern ? The devil is in the details.

Does it matter ?

2010-11-16T09:56:00.000-08:00

Category: Short Story

It was my mom's usual wake up call. My cell phone rung and I woke up to wish her good morning. It's customary and we had a deal over this for the past 3 years. "Did I wake you up?" asked my mom. I gave the usual diplomatic reply, "It's alright". No body would like to start a day with a fight, that too with one's mom and especially not on a Sunday.

As it was Sunday, I had planned a lot of activities to postpone and take complete rest. I was half asleep and holding on to my newly purchased smart phone with great care. In any case, If I fell asleep during the call, I had made sure, that the phone dropped on my pillow. Excited about my shift from Bangalore to Chennai, my mom went on, " Surya, How is Chennai ? I heard it is raining cats and dogs ? The weather is unlike Bangalore. Are you washing your clothes properly ? Don't use the same jeans for more than 2 days.." . I had to interrupt. For god's sake, I am 24 years old, mature enough guy and those are forbidden questions and suggestions. I play a responsible position in my office and won't I know to do all that properly. But still, A mom is a mom.

I changed the subject. I interrupted, " So, what is up? Who is getting married? " My guess wasn't totally incorrect. She replied, "Do you know Babu uncle's wife's eldest sister's father-in-law? He has attained 60 years of age and they are celebrating the function for it, near your place in Chennai ? The auspicious hours are scheduled at 9:30 am. It would be so nice, if you can represent us." Before even, she could go on further, I gave an instantaneous reply in a hebetudinous manner, "Impossible. I don't know any one of them". My mom rushed to reply, " Yes, yes, I know. But there is some one who like to meet you."

Well, that was quite a twist in the story. Who on earth was that ? I was quite puzzled. I was eager to know but I also had to be cautious not to express my interest explicitly. So, I replied in a sober tone, "Well, who is that? I don't want to meet any body." Mom was a little agitated with my reply and replied in a sharp tone, "Well, if you don't want to meet, it's OK. Then don't go. That girl is so beautiful and sings so well. If you don't want to meet, then it's none of my business."

For a second, I realized that I shouldn't have said that I didn't want to meet any one. It's quite an impressive one liner about a girl. I love music and of course beautiful girls. Both the quality in the same girl is a better option to have as a life partner. Precisely, my mom was asking me to attend the function for the same reasons. As I was decently trained in diplomatic talks, I managed, "Well then, Don't be angry mom. I didn't mean to insult anyone. All I want to say is, you should have said me a little earlier. I had planned for a lot of things... Now, I have to postpone a bunch of my work." My mom gave a fitting reply, "Oh..no no, Don't postpone your work because of this.."

I didn't quite expect that reply from my mom. I thought she will insist and I can have my way and meet the mysterious girl waiting to meet me. A strategy struck my mind. I questioned, "No, the work is nothing very important. Have they invited you in person ?. " My mom aptly replied, "No, but they called us and said we must come over." Well, precisely I was looking for this word and I replied, " Then it is minimal respect that some one from our family must represent. I will go. Don't bother".

I noted down details of the marriage hall and land mark. I was said that my aunt will come over there to introduce me to the mystery girl. I quickly got up from my bed, freshened myself, sprayed the Axe deodorant all over. The Axe deodorant ad showed girls jumping over the guy who had sprayed it over. But, I must not demand more of this deodorant considering my very average looks. But nevertheless, I was very curious about this girl and didn't want to lose a chance to impress assuming my mom's description about the girl was true. How did she know me in the first place? I wondered if it was some plan of the elders to make us meet to talk to each other. I rejected that idea myself considering that would be more cinematic.

I was well dressed, all set to meet the girl at the function. I reached the reception promptly and was waiting for my aunt to turn up. Time passed by and I was running out of patience. My aunt didn't show up for a long time. Many old people recognized me by guessing from my looks. I was finding the process of marking attendance in such family functions extremely difficult. It otherwise becomes a more serious diplomatic issue among families. I was gazing around to pass time sipping my third cup of coffee.

I never knew, there were lot of beautiful ladies in Babu uncle's wife's eldest sister's family. They were mostly married I suppose. Beauty strikes you before morality. But I have to invoke my moral imperatives before I start feeling guilty. As I was waiting to get my fourth cup of coffee, I had the intuitive sensation that some one is looking at me from a distance.

Yes, She was looking at me. A tightly knit white shirt with the sleeves folded and a tight jeans hanging on to her hip. I have to rephrase my earlier statement. Even before beauty, it is the form that strikes you before morality. I looked back at her. She was looking into me and so stylish was her walk, that I couldn't believe that she was coming towards me. She should have spent a fortune in her hair style. What a perfect modern girl ? But it does not tally with my mom's description that "She sings so well" ? May be western music. Jazz, Rock, Death metal. My heart was a little excited.

She indeed had come to talk to me. She introduced herself as Swetha. In accordance with her form, she had a sonorous husky voice which at the same time was erotic. It gelled so much with her personality that it was difficult for me to concentrate on what she was talking. I asked blandly, " How did you know me ? ". She gave a hearty laugh and replied, "what were you listening to while I was talking to you ? ". That was embarrassing. She had known me from my blog where I had written my short stories. I had shared them in a social networking site. We had mutual friends and she got to know me via my cousin. She especially liked the "The Alchemist, Iron and me" which was an abstruse take on human behavior.

I was glad to know that some one liked my writing. That was encouraging. She wanted me to continue writing and wished me good luck. She bid me good bye and vanished into the crowd. Was it the Axe Deodorant effect? I wondered.The crowd was getting settled on their chairs and fulminate silence pervaded the hall. As every one sat down, a bunch of kids with musical instruments like violin, drums and flute were seated near the dais. There she was coming in a traditional authentic costume reflecting the richness of Tamil culture in her neatly plaited hair. Was it the Swetha whom I just met ? I couldn't trust myself. The eye lashes accentuated with kajal and the glittering jewellery in her ears and neck made her look like a goddess. She was divine yet attractive. What a turn of personality! It turned me inside out. For once, I shut down my moral imperatives to appreciate the beauty generously.

For a moment, I came up with an intense reflection on girls. Girls are like chameleons and they had the power to change instantaneously as per the needs. Yet, in either case, this particular chameleon was so attractive. She performed like a virtuoso and rendered carnatic music as it should be rendered. I am no one to talk about the grammar and patterns of ragas and thalams, but I was so stunned with her performance.

As the song sessions came to an end, there was some talks organized. Some elderly people were asked to come and talk about the person for whom the function was celebrated. I was least bothered about him and was waiting for Swetha to appear in frame again. I waited for a long time and there was no sign of her. Where on earth did she go ? I was restless. I cursed myself for being unlucky. I badly wanted to check if it was her who wanted to meet me in the function. I wanted to know how did she pass the message across to my mom.

My destiny ruled the day. She was not to be found. I was tired and decided to leave to my room. I came out of the hall to ride back to my room. As I stepped out a few steps, I saw Swetha in her traditional costume waiving hands at the autos. I guess the auto drivers are heartless creatures. How could one not stop for a ride when such a beauty is waiving her hand ? I went to her rescue. It also gave me some time to interact with her. "Hey, Your singing was just mind blowing. Fantastic." She gave a strange look as if she had never seen me. I was perplexed.

She replied with a blunt "Thanks." And started looking either side for the next auto to show up. I convinced myself that may be, she was in a hurry and was upset that she was not getting the auto. Though it sounded imprudent, with the intention of helping her, I asked her, " I can drop you if you want to go some where urgently." Her expression reflected her discomfort and I was deeply abashed. She replied politely "No. Thanks. you go ahead. " I was surprised. Was she having a split personality disorder? I couldn't believe that it was the Swetha I had met in the morning.

As I stand baffled, Swetha walked in from behind and patted on my shoulder. I was so blown out of the water. What a surprise package ? I was standing in front of identical twins. I was silenced and laughed at myself thinking about the fallacy I had gone through. Swetha introduced the pious and introverted Sahana, her twin sister to me. Swetha summoned an auto in her own commanding style and they boarded into it. As the auto moved on, Swetha looked out and waived a good bye to me. Her smile was magical. It had struck my heart with an anchor and taken away along with her in the auto.

As I turned back to start my bike, I was caught in a moral dilemma. To be honest, I liked both of them. They complement each other. Both of them, stole my heart away. In a convincing way, Swetha had returned her magical smile. A relationship might possibly work out. But, what about my emotions for Sahana. My mind replied, "Oh!! Come on..It's not even for a day you know both of them." I discarded such logical and depressing thoughts. I came back to my senses. I started my bike. As I started my bike, I reminded myself that I must confirm the names from my mom. May be the girl I was supposed to meet was neither one of them. Does it matter ? I kicked off my bike to ride back to my room.

To be a cheat or a fool ?

2010-11-13T02:55:00.001-08:00

I remember distinctly the quote from super star Rajini's film "Thillu mullu". The quote goes like this, "You can be a cheat, but not a fool". My shopping experience today at Reliance Trends at Radha Krishnan Salai made me feel like a fool. I had a heated debate with my brother with regard to the contemporary business practices and their marketing strategy. So, here goes the story.

Me and My brother bought clothes worth Rs.6000/- . For which, the shop keeper said, you will have gift coupons worth Rs.2000/- for every purchase worth Rs.3000/-. So, I got gift coupons worth Rs.4000/- Here comes the tricky part. Each coupon is worth Rs.500 and I had 8 such coupons totaling Rs.4000/-

After the billing was done, I went to collect the coupon and was generally inquiring about how to use the coupons. I was shocked to know that to use a coupon of Rs.500/- I have to purchase items of worth Rs.1000/- . (i.e) On the next purchase, Say I purchase for Rs.8000/-, I have to pay Rs.4000/- from my pocket and for the remaining Rs.4000/-, I can use the coupons. Real crooked evil minded creatures have designed this hanky-panky scheme.

I was so infuriated and was slammed on the face by this dubious offer. What a load of crap ? I purchase for Rs.6000/- and they don't even give me a Rs.50/- discount. They give me some coupons in the name of offer and say that this is valid only on the next purchase. Then, above all they boast and brag about their grand offer which is clear case of skulduggery.

When I say this is pathetic, my brother argues that this is their market strategy to make the customer spend more. But I don't see the point. Yes, Now I am tempted to spend Rs.4000/- more to avail the offer and use the coupons. So in a normal scenario, my expenditure would have been Rs.6000/- But now it looks most probably I will tempted by the offer and spend Rs.4000/- more. Clearly the company wins.

I feel it is unethical to give such an offer and when it's quality is questioned, simply cover the dubious nature of the same using "Conditions apply" tag. What so ever means, their only objective is make the customer spend. But, my brother disagrees with me and he sides with the company's so called strategy to make customer spend a little more. But, to me, it looks like making a fool out of me. I don't know why I feel that way but I do feel like that. May be the company is right. The customer is here to Spend and spend a little more.

The Thermodynamics of the body - Sandya Vandanam

2010-11-13T02:52:00.000-08:00

It's high time that I put down what I understood from the preceding section of the Gayathri Japam in Sandya Vandanam. This is purely my interpretation. May be wrong.

As a prequel, I have explained here "What is the meaning of Gayathri mantra? "

"Sandya Vandanam" [Prayers] is one of the most finest practice illustrated in the culture of Sanadhana Dharmam. Hinduism is derived from it. The write up in Vedasurabhi.org home page gives brief summary about Sanadana Dharmam.

The "Japa Sankalpam" [ Preparation for the Jabam ] is the preceding section to "Gayathri Jabam". This section involves "invoking" divine powers in the upper section of the body by touching the Forehead [ amidst eyebrows], below the nose[ and above the upper lip] and in the stomach. [ Right below the diaphragm/rib cage/above the belly button]. The mantras said during this phase is what interests me.

I always kept wondering what are we doing by touching the specific positions of the upper body. What does that mantra signify?

I was clueless until I read a book by a Siddhar [ Tamil Mystic]. There he starts the dialogue with a strange question. I am presenting it as a conversation.

Tamil Mystic : "Where is fire in the body ?"

Me : [Giving it no thought, I replied] It should be in the belly. We feel acid and boiling sensations in the stomach. So the fire has to be there.

Tamil Mystic : [Rejects the answer and gives the right reply. ] No, The fire is in the forehead. In between the two eye brows. Don't ask me why. It is part of the thermodynamics of the body. That's the way we are gifted to live.

Me : Thermodynamics? In body ?

Tamil Mystic : Yes. The location of fire is not identified by experiment but by deduction. By understanding how the body functions, we can deduce that the heat source has to be there.

Me: Strange. Can you please elaborate ?

Tamil Mystic : Ok. Tell me, why do the feces smell ?

Me : [ Uncomfortably] Sorry, I am not sure, that I know the answer for that.

Tamil Mystic : Don't feel uncomfortable. First you must shed the inhibition to understand your body. That is the first step.

Me: Sorry. Please go ahead with your explanation. Why does the feces smell?

Tamil Mystic : The answer is same like boiling the vegetables and pulses inside a cooker. You keep pulses inside a cooker and heat the cooker. After few minutes, when you open the cooker, you can smell pulses right ?

Me : Yes

Tamil Mystic : Precisely that's what happens. Your food is boiled in your stomach. It is not heated in your stomach. So for boiling, you need steam and not fire. So, your food in stomach is boiled by Steam.

Me: Wow.

Tamil Mystic : Where does the steam come from ? It comes through your respiration. When properly inhaled, the air goes in through the nostrils. The source of fire has to be there in the Forehead. The air propels the fire and the air is heated. So, when you breath well, the fire glows well. When the fire glows well, the air is well heated. With the moisture/water content in the body, this becomes steam and goes down the esophagus/larynx and right into our liver and stomach.

Me : Right. Now the food is boiled. You mean digestion.

Tamil Mystic : Since the food is boiled like in cooker with steam, your feces smell. Any vegetable/food put into fire, doesn't give away any smell. Only boiled items, give away odor.

Me: Thanks a lot. I understand now that respiration blows air through the nostrils to glow the fire in our forehead, which in turn turns as a steam to digest our food.

After the discussion, While I was doing my sandya vandanam [ Jaba Sankalpam], and touching the three mentioned sections in the mantra, I realized that the meaning of the mantra is precisely to become conscious of the thermodynamic process of our body. Especially while touching above the belly button, we say "Agni vaayuhu, arga vageesa, varuna, indra, viswedeva, devathaaha"... Note it is mentioned "Agni Vaayuhu" - means steam.

It was interesting to know that mantras have been written down to make us conscious of our body thermodynamics. That is the first and fundamental part of the transcendental evolution.

Please feel free to correct me. I might be wrong with the interpretation.

Head in Clouds - Part 2

2010-11-13T01:50:00.000-08:00

I had written about what is a cloud and how can it be visualized. I had justified that there are economical and technological benefits associated with the cloud. In this section, I shall write about various options and how they compare, Security concerns, Long term benefits, cloud adoption etc.
What options do we have in the cloud ?

Like a typical consultant, the reply is “It depends”. Yes. Cloud is for every one. We have good number of vendors and a good variety to start with. Let me get a little technical.
Cloud can be presented in three flavors. They are Infrastructure-as-a-Service, Platform-as-a-Service and Software-as-a-Service. Depending upon the customer’s needs, each format of cloud offering can be adopted.

Infrastructure-as-a-Service [Iaas] is as simple as hiring the infrastructure required to run your IT. The infrastructure can be servers, storage, network systems or any other core hardware component which forms the integral part of your IT system. Currently, the enterprises buy hardware. With Cloud, they can rent it. That too at a very economical rate. There is surely a cost advantage associated with renting in the short term, but a long term evaluation has to be done to check the financial feasibility.
In Iaas, the users have enormous flexibility to install operating system of their choice, control virtualization, networking, scalability, clustering etc. The user is given access to the consoles and can dynamically scale the infrastructure on-demand.

But,for the non-IT firms, those are still over head tasks. With Iaas, only access to the Infrastructure is given. The user/enterprises has to install, configure, maintain[ Patching and updates] the operating system and applications on own and the work becomes very complex when the user has to write/develop applications with high availability, fail-over and scalable architectures.

Eg: Amazon web services[ Amazon EC2], Rackspace etc.

Platform-as-a-Service is a complex concept in which only a few can excel. This service serves the developer community primarily. It gives a platform on which your applications can be developed, deployed and managed. It has every thing you want. You just need the right credentials to log into it and start developing. The companies that offer this service have mostly integrated the developer friendly/ known development platforms like Visual Studio, Eclipse etc to work with the Platform cloud hosted in their data centers.

The huge advantage associated with this service is, it is extremely easy to develop and deliver application with very less lead time. Agile methods of application development can be used readily and results can be delivered very quickly. This is a very important point to be noted as in this era of fast paced industry, it makes a huge difference to deliver quality quickly and swiftly to become and sustain one’s position.
The disadvantage is that developer doesn’t have much control over the version, patch and updates that happen to the OS/Application/APIs that the platform provides. But still, the user has enough controls to fine tune his platform.

Eg: Microsoft Azure Platform, Google App Engine.

Software-as-a-Service provides a ready to use software solution. This services is mostly inflexible and less customizable. The applications/services are hosted by the vendors and users can readily log in to use it. Wide variety of Software solutions are available as a service like Authentication, Social media, Email Services, Documents, CRM, HR, Accounting etc. This is a real advantage for Small and Medium companies which can cut down huge costs by using this services.

Eg: SalesForce.com, Google Apps, Microsoft BPOs, Office365, SharePoint Online
There are notions that cloud fits best only for small and medium enterprises. I disagree. If you look at the options above, it is clearly for every one, Small, Medium and Big Enterprises.
So, What next?

Having read the options, A quick doubt arises. Alright, Cloud is cool. But, I have already got a billion invested in my data center. What do I do? How do I integrate ? How do I manage ? What are the standards in the cloud ? Who can help me monitor and manage my cloud ?

Head in clouds - Part 1

2010-11-11T01:24:00.000-08:00

Simple and effective. Cloud computing will play a major role in the future of Enterprise IT. It's the solution that will define a whole new shift in the methods and way in which business is done. The hype and halo around "Cloud" is true and pronounced. I say this, not just because I have to write about it but the growing concern among the enterprises, big and small is an inevitable sign of growing prowess of the cloud.

Even though it is a little cliched, I would like to reiterate that Cloud gives economical and technological benefits on a whole new scale. It is appropriate to call it a evolution than a revolution. It is only natural that as web and web technologies penetrate deeper and wider, that the business should leverage and scale on that platform.

When did the idea of cloud start ?
Honestly, Really Long back. It's always been the ultimate dream. If you look at the history of computers, technology, it is always been wanting to develop and pursue a more interconnected world where data and information freely flow across for the benefit and common good of every one. What if all this can come with a economical advantage ? Then that's a win-win for the business and end users.

So, why is this concept getting popular now ?
Due to advent of more mobile world. As well said, necessity is the mother of invention. Inventions will lead to business and growth. Over the past 30 odd years, since the development of world wide web, protocols and security has got better and better to suit the growing demands of online space. A more open standard has evolved and has been serving as the roots of this huge Banyan tree called "Internet"

With the development of necessary infrastructural support and technological advances, and Enterprises having driven to control costs and save energy, the light shined on Cloud computing as the solution.

What is the Economical and technological Advantage ?
The right question should be how does the cloud serve beneficial to its users. The usual and existing business model prompts the user to buy infrastructure to run application required for the business practices and organizations. There are outsourcing firms and in-house firms which develop, deploy, maintain the application. The applications can be varied from a simple web application to a complex sophisticated service. To bring in more reality, now the users have to address over head issues of maintenance, evaluation of software/hardware vendors, In-house work force to co-ordinate the IT tasks and above all, to provide High availability, Business continuity with a back end infrastructure to support scalability to cater to fluctuating demand.

I can hear your thoughts. We have been doing this for so long that we are used to it. Precisely, that's why I strongly recommend Cloud as it is the much awaited disruptive force to help us evolve to next level of collaborated distributed computing to leverage the power of shared utilization of resources, to optimize performance and achieve greater results.

The cloud can be visualized as well connected and tightly coupled Data Centers distributed across the globe. Big players like Microsoft, Amazon, Google, SalesForce.com etc run these data centers and provide the platform, infrastructure and software as a service to the end user. The cloud also provides a low entry barrier for start ups and SMEs by helping them utilize the power of cloud to deliver their products than invest heavily on the infrastructure and platform.

Since it is a shared architecture and computing is seen as a utility like electricity, it stands to deliver economically. The users register for the respective services [ Platform, Infrastructure or Software ] and are billed based on their usage. The major highlight of the cloud is Business continuity and On-demand scalability becomes a default feature. All applications hosted on cloud are by default highly available and can scale up and down at will. So, the cloud stands to serve technologically too.

So, what all options do we have in cloud ? What happens to the data ? How am I billed? How does the cloud work? Doesn't it have any disadvantages ? What are the benchmarks and standards ? Find out more in the next blog.

The meaning of Gayathri Mantra

2010-10-20T02:21:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer : All the thoughts shared here are mostly read from a source and interpreted. The interpretations are debatable and subjective. Suggestions are welcome.

I have a different understanding of the mantra which may or may not be correct and appropriate, but surely original to a certain extent. As I kept thinking about a reason why to do this "Sandhya vandanam"? What does it signify? So I read a lot of physics, quantum mechanics and astronomy....

First realization :
We are all social animals. Then I introspected further with my limited knowledge.

OM:

1. There is some thing called CMB {Cosmic microwave Background} which is considered to be the sound/light wave which must have originated when the big bang occurred. Around 1960s two people {of course US guys} found out that CMB does exist now and it's wavelength has become too elongated so beyond visual or audio levels of humans....But the beauty of CMB is, it is uniform in all directions of the universe and in any location...That stunning discovery is a parallel to "OM"..In my humble opinion, it is that all pervading, waves of light and sound, though not seen or heard was intuitively addressed in this mantra as "OM"....

2. Note that OM is actually "AUM"..... Because, it is also to express the limits of our expression. Or in other words, it is the boundary conditions......"AUM" is the combination of "Aaaa" produced when the mouth is completely open and lips are wide apart, "Uuu" Produced when lips are intermediate position, and "Mmm" Produced when lips are tightly closed and sound is generated from with in....

So "AUM" is the beginning, middle and end of all available set of sounds which any thing on this universe can produce..Any other sound produced must lie with in .."Aaa" or "Uuuu" or "Mmmm".

"BHUH, BHUVAH, SVAH" :

3. This in my opinion addresses different layers of consciousness rather different forms of the universe. There are actually seven layers of conscious states which are known in vedas.... we utter that in our Pranayamam "Om Bhuh, Om Bhuvah, Om suvah, Om Mahah, OM Janah, Om Tapah, Om Satyam .

4. But after Svah, all the other four layers that follow are very subtle and Svah can address them as well and sufficient to consciously realize the others....

5. So, up till here, we mean, OM is all pervading entity uniformly across all space and in time, and Bhuh, Bhuvah, Svahah are different layers of consciousness in an ascending order towards illumination and enlightment..

6. Bhuh refers to the worldly consciousness, Bhuvah refers to Dream like consciousness, Svah is Space and time transcended consciousness {Can be called state of bliss}.

Putting together:
We meditate upon YOU [ Bhargo devasya dhimahi], who is the creator of BHUH, BHUVAH, SVAH [Tat savitr varenyam], who is also manifested as OM....[ This is to be understood bit indirectly. Since OM as a cosmic light/wave sound exist, it has to be HIM behind it's creation. ] to lead us in right direction towards you.[Dhiyoyonah pracho dayath]

Deducing by induction:

==> here, they are not appealing to the intellect. It is the intellect which help them reason out the existence of OM, BHUH, BHUVAH, SVAH. Intellect stops there. It can't help you any more.

==> So, Having understood via the intellect about the existence of supernatural supreme creator of OM, BHUH, BHUVAH, SVAH, we take the route which is beyond reason and logic....That is by complete surrender with out questioning to the all pervading manifested force to push your energy to a state of bliss and complete detachment....

So, Gayathri manthra is just the starting point of the journey.....It stimulates the intellect to reason out and then on investigation and analysis, the student is convinced to completely surrender to the ONE. When he surrenders, there is again a long arduous journey to the complete state of bliss......{Which only the choosen ones can take}

Thanks for patiently reading so far....There are lot of contemporary scientific evidences which conjure with our believes and practices..... "Planck's Constant/God particle === Brahman", "Issues of probability and statistics === Fate/Free will", "Theory of everything ==== Advaita" ... Etc etc....

But again..all the scientific pursuit of knowledge will only take up till a point...It will help us know the path...but traveling the path is beyond science, beyond rituals, beyond religion, beyond mantras, beyond BEYOND....

Sorry if my opinions hurt any one's beliefs but I strongly believe in the above said reasons...if you find any flaw please feel free to correct me.

Bangalore Memories

2010-10-14T09:51:00.000-07:00

2007 - 2008 :
Agilent technologies, PS2, HP - Electronic City, Prabhakar, Junk Visual basic testing, HP Lawns, Kings, Old Monk, Vicky, Suresh, Old Madras Road, Shivaji film, Keerthi Wines, Outer Ring Road, Padmanabha-HR, Nandi Hills trip, Priyanka, Dweepika, Siva, Sundar, Madhan, Ashu, Pravin - Arvind kamath, Sutapa, Hunky dorry, Bastilla, Jumping out of the window, Rains, Aravindhan Room, madhorse, Ramesh - PS2 instructor, Second sem, CTS interview, 4-Stroke engine, Bong, First flight, VSM tool, Radhika, Vijay, Shell scripting, VMware, RHEL, OS guru, Malini, Nandini, Coorg, Tenkasi, Butterflies fly, Meet Padmanabha for Stipend, No money, Life on loan, 7+ CG, Pilani pass out.

2008 - 2010 :
All Quit, Interview in Barista - GN Chetty road, SUN Microsystems, Movies, cubicle talkies, QA, Rgm, Smg, Work From Home, Trekking, photography, sony camera, cubicle cricket, Short stories, scribbling, Shanthi Nagar, Krishna Cafe, Nandini, PVR Cinemas , Sagar, Cuddalore, Daaba Dinners,
Mayil, Sappai, Marathalli, In a conversation, Deepa, Niyanthri, Shekar's apartment, Free lunch, Business Venu, Kweez Harish, Facebook, Twitter, Fictitious Jiddu K, RKN Novels, Idea of Justice, Zen and the Art of motorcycle maintenance, Jakku boys director Sathish, Mayur-GK-me discussions, Three quarters Chinese, Amoeba bowling, Destiny- Free will discussions with shekar, Lab, Long walk with Steve, Hema - The Coding guru, Ganesh, AGAM, Pondichery, Kyra, Bombay producer, Duke's nose trek, Aishwarya, Mullyanagiri- missed, Neck Sprain, Bye bye.

A losing winner

2010-10-05T09:41:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

I worked in the 4th floor of my office as a software professional. It was lunch time and the cafeteria in the 5th floor was filled with people hoping to witness a miracle. I was one among them eagerly waiting to witness the same. As software professional is congruous with lax culture, the mob had gathered in the cafeteria to watch the India Vs Australia test match.To my surprise, I got to know that the crowd had been keeping a close watch on the match right since morning. The list included the director of the company as well.

It was the last day of the test, with India struggling hard to win. 26 runs had to be scored to bag the win. It did sound easy but there were only 2 wickets remaining. Though one of the batsman had a proven track record, it was the other end that mattered. Enthusiastic crowd was cheering the Indian players using telepathy and complex intuitive extra sensory mediums. High blood pressure patients were asked to stay away from cafeteria officially.Emotions were running high. Bets were made on a per ball basis.

I ordered for a sandwich and sat along with my team members Ganesh, Sreekanth, Madhur and Sruthi. Madhur initiated the conversation stating that India had to win this match to vilify the aussies. Ganesh and Sreekanth agreed. India must win but they were a little skeptical about the unsettled batsmen on the other end. Their hearts skipped beats when the tail ending batsmen was trying to play a stroke. Their blood almost froze when there were lbw was appealed.

In a cool fashion, I made a bet. I announced that I support Australia and I have full faith that they are going to steal this match away. Both sides have posted a dismal performance in the second innings and if at all any one deserved a win, it was Australia. I avowed my thoughts affirmatively. My team members were instigated and it was Sruthi who took it very personally. She started railing at me for being a bigot and anti-nationalist.

She was a real beauty and her beauty accentuated when she was angry. Her eyes wide and her lips would start cursing sweetly. She had a cherubic personality which would instantly transfix any person. Her voice was filled with pleasantness and her hair drooling over her soldiers looked like a river flowing down the mountains of wayanad. She had such a power to distract any one even if he was telling an intense tale of a gripping sensational cricket match.

A sudden uproar in the crowd brought me back to my senses. The bowler had appealed for a lbw and the umpire had given out. Disappointed people were shaking their heads hopelessly. Aussies with a new hope were back in to the fight. 15 more runs, last wicket standing. Will Indians deliver? The question ruled the hearts of every one there. Sruthi looked at me with such disgust and asked if I had a black patches in my tongue. It seemed she was a little archaic as she believed that people who had black patches in their tongue had occult powers of prognostication.

A few more minutes of silence prevailed. Dot balls and singles happening rarely. Aussies were commanding and had complete discipline in their bowling. Singles taken by running closely between the wickets kept the hope alive for Indians. There was sheer anxiety over each and every ball. Indians were slowly lurching towards the target. 5 more runs to win and the last wicket standing still. There was a little relief in the air as the better of the two batsmen came to bat. To every one's shock he was floundering with inappropriate shots for the short ball and bouncy ones. A quick yorker came in line and he just stopped it to manage a quick single. The over excited fielder over threw the ball and missed the stumps and the run out as well. Alas, not only did it miss the stumps but also missed every other fielder in the ground and ran amuck to the neighboring boundary. This pulled the curtain down and granted victory for the Indians. There was so much brouhaha that the cafeteria shook a little. People celebrating as if they owned the victory. They were deliriously charged up to celebrate the astounding sensational success.

Sruthi gave me a condescending look and commanded me to run away and save my face. She burst into laughter affronting my ego. I smiled. I convinced myself that I will bear all the revilement for India. I had a proven history that when ever I supported Indian team, they have lost and lost badly. I didn't want this to happen and not today. I decided to pawn myself and express my support for Aussies. I know she will not understand if I had told this. No body will understand. I had a greater responsibility to keep this image to make India win in their upcoming matches. Beautiful girls are generally dumb but I hope Sruthi is an exception. Just minutes before, had she observed that I didn't celebrate when the Aussies took away a crucial wicket, she would understand me. I hope so.

A Search and a Wait

2010-08-27T09:15:00.000-07:00

Category: Short Story

I was resolved. I laughed at myself. I was thoroughly convinced. The search for a new beginning had to be my destiny. A path less traveled and less understood. I boarded the 10 pm bus from Bengaluru to Sringeri. This would be my last trip to Sringeri as I didn't plan to come back. Yes, I had decided to lead a life to serve a higher purpose. I had decided to lead a celibate life. I purposed to be a Sanyasi devoid of self inflicted commitments.

I got the relieving order from my work a week back. I took some time to introspect. I transferred the money and property I had in my name to my parents' account. I just made sure that I had sufficient material and money to reach Sringeri. It was not a decision that was taken out of frustration but I couldn't hold myself any longer. Not that Nithi refused to accept my proposal nor am I able to get rid of her thoughts from my mind, but to some extent it was her marriage which came as a final blow to all my beliefs and faith.

It was not a simple and linear love story with a make and break plot. It was non-linear and super natural. To call it divine would be a cliche but I did believe like every other romantic fool. I wasn't enlightened enough to comprehend nature. She insisted to change my mind but I persisted to convince her that I shall wait for her. The wait was worth it. Though her marriage did not hurt, it was the best way I could convince myself that she really didn't want to share her life with me. It did hurt a bit but I hope it was not too much.

To wait and get into another relationship would be a very difficult option. It was impossible as it would totally ruin the other wise peaceful life of the other one. While I look back, I had been truthful and very honest to myself while I believed that one day, Nithi would accede to my proposal. The wait was honest and hopeful. As the wait failed, It was not my hope nor my love that failed but it was that honesty and truth that failed.

I got swarmed with myriad of philosophical questions and I struggled with the self. To answer them was inconceivable and an attempt to answer them was insufferable. I drowned myself with the memories of memories from my past and tried to search for a convincing reason to carry on a sane life. Alas, my life had been such a hapless one or was I just a sober sadomasochist? I would not deny it totally.I kind of liked the pain and this final blow was my breaking point.

I got down at Sringeri. It was raining cats and dogs. As far as I remember, nothing has ever been simple in my life. I detested and sought a new beginning. A path devoid of all the worldly commitments. I was searching for the freedom and peace with in. While science and intellect could answer a lot of 'whats and hows', it could never try to answer the questions beginning with 'why'. I reached as far my intellect could reason my catastrophic calamitous life filled with regrets and rejections. Why me of all the people? I never could understand.

It was time that I surrendered and accepted my failure. I couldn't fight any longer. I gave in and I didn't want to survive in this monotonous life like every other creature on earth. I proscribed and self abnegated and resolved to lead an abstemious yet purposeful life. To be content and at peace with oneself is the highest purpose in life. I had come to Sringeri in search for one such journey. It was early morning when I reached and I walked towards the Sri Adi Sankara mutt in the pouring rain. I could see the sun slowly rising from the Kudremukh hills behind and radiating light around.

The rains eased as the dawn set in. I took a plunge in the Tunga river flowing blissfully. It was like a catharsis. It sanctified me in my body and mind. This bold decision to cut off from fictitious life and lead a truthful and content life gave me enormous spiritual and moral strength. I felt oneness with every thing around. I felt the subject-object-divide vanquish and one eternal truth evolved. The time was ripe to approach the right people in the mutt to help me take my sanyasa and request the spiritual guru there to seek his blessings and guidance.

As I approached the concerned authorities, they asked me to wait in the "Guru Nivas" where the Guru showers his blessings to the devotees. I dressed up in the dhoti I had brought and covered myself with a shawl which had the auspicious holy mantra "Om" written on it. I had a bearded look with intense search for bliss evidently popping out in my sober eyes. I hoped that my wait will fructify and my questions will be answered.

As I stood there among the few other people who had come from different parts of the country to seek His Holiness' blessings, I observed a single purpose that unified every aspect of human life. It was hope that connected us all. It was hope that defined the entire race. It was hope that kept us seeking. Hope complemented one's purpose. When the hope was questioned, your faiths and beliefs are shattered. When your faiths and beliefs are shattered, you are at square one again searching and hoping for a new dawn.

Like a breeze, there she was sitting in the front, few foot steps away from me. Her attire was simple and she was dressed in a sandal color Saree. Pious and devoted, there she was arranging her harmonium, preparing to sing a song. As she started, the entire hall was filled with scintillating notes from an ancient composition by a mystic who lived in the 18th century. The rendering of the intricacies of the raga was not only mellifluous but was so filled with passion and dedication that distinctly delivered her complete surrender to the Divine. It was out of the world experience. For a second, her singing remembered me of my grand ma singing melodious songs to feed me food during my childhood days. Those were really blissful days. I was be-dazed to know that my past had a peaceful phase.

The dulcet singing by her was taking me back to those repose and tranquil days of innocence. I was so deeply engrossed in her idyllic vocals. There is a point where one becomes thoughtless and her singing just made me witness for myself that thoughtless state of eternal bliss. I made it a point that I must thank her for her absolutely mesmerizing rendition. It even brought back reminiscences of my grand ma's devotion towards the goddess at Sringeri and her patronage towards the Sri Adi sankara mutt. How else would I know about Sringeri? I clearly remembered she used to take me for a walk to the Siva temple at the end of Bharathi Street and she would offer her prayers with soulful rendering of devotional songs.

The Guru came. People went and met him one by one but my mind was fixed on thanking her. I withdrew from the crowd and went a little away waiting for her to come back after seeking blessings from the Guru. There she came walking towards me like a lovely angel. Her age should be fairly around 18. She wasn't very beautiful but I was attracted to her. May be it was her serene gesture, or her innocent smile, or her pleasant voice. May be all this put together, attracted me. I was worried that I might be mistaken. But, I must thank her.

I went near her, extolled and thanked her from the bottom of my heart. She gave a simple smile as her reply. That smile conveyed a lot more about her simplicity and also about her modesty and profound devotion towards Music. I didn't want to cut short the conversation. I longed for it to prolong for a while. She went past me and then into the woods which leads to the entrance of the mutt. I knew at that moment that I would go running to her to continue the talk. I did.

I was totally clueless about the topic to talk to her. I initiated, "Was the raga of that song, Hindolam?". She was not expecting me to follow her. But, I guess she would have clearly understood I knew nothing about Music. She replied "No, It is Ahir Bhairavi" and smiled at me. This smile brought the sarcasm in her reply. A killing look that made me feel stupefied. But, She would have subtly got in her mind that I was least interested to know about the raaga.

A little breeze swept across and the drizzling started. As I took a moment to appreciate the timely reaction from nature, she was slowly jogging away trying to escape the down coming rains. I knew she would turn back and look at me from a distance and she did. As the rain drops fell rhythmically, the pregnant clouds poured down bliss, there she ran away looking back at me as I had expected. And that one look transfixed me for ever convincing me of a positive reason to carry on with my life. As I picked up the blessed jasmine and rose petals that fell from her lengthy braid, I could see the romance blossom again in me, around me and every where.For once, the woods were lovely, really dark and deep. The mellifluous melody of nature continued to play on as I walked through the woods. I could sense the hope in my heart again. A hope for a new beginning. May be an intrinsic longing manifested in this destined search for peace.

Oops...I should have asked her name. I guess it would be based on a romantic raga or may be a term in sanskrit which denotes a pious girl. In any case it had to be traditional.

It is time that I find out a way to get back to my home and request my parents talk to her parents. I am thoroughly convinced. I am resolved. I am laughing at myself. I even think I should prepare myself with the vedic texts as the girls' family might want to marry her off only to a person with vedic knowledge.

If she refuses, I don't have any other option. I will take to sanyasa. Wish me good luck.

A Rainy Dream

2010-08-19T21:35:00.001-07:00

Category: Short Story

He has been playing in the rains all evening along. The monsoon rains with the breezy winds has been blowing all over in an orchestrated fashion. It has been a very happy Sunday evening for him. His parents had left him with his grand ma and grand pa for a week end.

He is a 5 year old, little, charming and hyper active kid, Surya, nick named "Chittu" meaning "little" usually denoting a sparrow. He loves to draw, goes for long walks with his grand pa in the country side, sits alone in his grand ma's corner room chair by the window side and looks through the telescope into the dotted sky in the nights. He falls asleep gazing at the moon and stars, listening to his grand ma's mellifluous singing.

The place is serenity incarnate with the blue green mountains standing tall and silent, with complete lush green fields and densely packed trees filling the land scape. What lies behind those huge and dense jungles are left to one's own imagination. Surya is dexterous enough in that aspect. He has always believed that the wild boar, three tigers and the black panther which come in his grand pa's bed time stories lived there. The more he believed in their existence the more he dreamed about them. The more he dreamed about them, the more he believed in them. He didn't bother much about the factual realities.

The evening rain had rendered a colder night. Surya was sitting on his grand ma's chair by the window side, listening attentively to his grand pa's story about the wild encounters in the jungle. Then came grand ma's turn to continue with a song which the parrots and cuckoos sing about their flight through the jungle. He was imbued in his own thoughts gazing at the moon and the stars.

His Grand pa has always promised him to take him into the jungle near the mountains. Surya has always wanted to domesticate the black panther. So, they decided and set off on their journey to conquer the jungle, with all their back packs loaded, waving bye to the grand ma. It was pitch black dark. With their torches streaming through the mid night fog, they clearly sensed it is going to be a long and treacherous journey. But, they were strong willed and determined to catch at least a glimpse of the black panther and in the best case capture and get it back home.

There were three stages to be covered. First, the easy and flat paddy fields, Second, the hilly and slippery mountain path and third, the dense jungle where the black panther rules. Surya had the lollipops and chewing gum to chew and keep himself awake through the journey and the grand pa had his sniffing powder to keep him active. As they kept on walking through, a sudden flash of intense lightening cracked the skies with a loud thunder. Infact, the loudest thunder Surya has ever heard. It sent jitters through his body.

Surya cringed behind his grand pa. It was not very long after the scary thunder, the storm followed. In the wink of an eye, down came the storm, pouring and unleashing it's madness all over the plains. While the evening rains in his grand ma's kitchen side garden was so much fun, he wondered why is the same rain appear now to be threatening?

There was no place to hide themselves. The only way is the way forward hoping to take cover under the thicket of trees in the jungle. The rain persisted. They kept marching ahead. They were slowly getting colder and tired and their torches were not powerful enough. The visibility was going down as they took every step forward.

Imagination imbibed with fear is far worse than the real threat. For once, Surya's adroit creativity was proving to be his night mare. With poisonous snakes and frogs all around, Surya felt a sense of urge in his bladder. And seconds before he could catch hold of his grand pa's hand, the torch light died. There was absolute darkness. Surya could not see. With a feeble voice, he cried out calling for his grand pa. Looking around and being unable to see what was going on, a sense of electrified shock over took him. He was left shivering with fear in the middle of nowhere.

Surya was so angry with his grand pa for leaving him in the darkness and there came the sound of his grand pa sniffing followed by a sneeze. He started running wildly towards the direction from where the sound came. Nothing is visible. Nothing could he realize nor could he guess. He just kept running as if guided by a super natural influence. And there struck the lightening again. Much bigger and Much louder than the previous one. Before he could realize he was running in the wrong direction, he fell into a stream of water flowing down the field. Luckily the stream was only knee deep.

The coldness had left him shaking and trembling. As he stood there in the stream looking for directions, he could hear the sound of an animal drinking water by his side. Could it be the dreaded black panther? Fear just quadrupled his urge in his bladder and no more could he control the need to pee. He just left it loose and did not even bother to unzip his pants.

There was a huge sense of relief but it was oddly coupled with inexplicable anxiety still lurching in his mind. He convinced himself every thing will be alright. He reminded himself that he should narrate this story to his school friends but duly wanted to make sure that he never discloses the part of the adventure where he urinated in his pants. "May be, I should say I hugged the panther and shared the chewing gum", he was preparing himself, in his bed wetting blissful dream, thinking of various alternatives that would make a convincing end to the story that he will narrate to his friends.

Vidiyalai Nokki

2010-08-13T20:48:00.000-07:00

An Ad film created for Social awareness on the importance of Educating Children.

Vidiyalai Nokki

Special thanks to AGAM, [ bangalore based carnatic Rock fusion band ] for "Nothing but hope" song from their collection.

Behind the scenes :

Discussion on INCEPTION

2010-07-18T11:12:00.000-07:00

I watched INCEPTION for the second time and I was so happy that I got it right almost 90% in the first time. After that, later today, Nandan pinged me to ask me some info. He as well asked me a doubt he had in Inception. You will find below the chat that followed to clear his doubt. I have pasted it below. It's pretty long. Long enough to bore you if you didn't understand the movie. I have raised few questions in the end. If you are conceptually good in psychology please clarify the same. Chat follows......

Nandan: hey dude

karthick: hey ya
Went for inception again today

Nandan:
what!!
i need to discuss something then with u on inception

karthick: Sure go ahead
I am happy that I got it right in the first time :D atleast 90%

Nandan: in the 3rd level of dream that businessman guy is dead
then 2 of them go in the 4th level

karthick: yes

Nandan: then in which level leonardo brings him back when he is an old man
4th or 5th?

karthick: See its complex there...follow me closely

Nandan: yes

karthick: 1. When a man dies in a dream, he falls into a limbo if he is sedated..
2. In our case, the japanese was sedated and he dies in the 3rd level

Nandan: right

karthick: 3. 4th level is nothing but the subconscious layer of de caprio

4. Since fischer was also dead in the dream whose life was taken by Mal, a projection of Cobb[de caprio], the next obvious step is to get into the subconscious of Cobb and confront Mal [ a projection of Cobb which is haunting him....],
5. so in that subconscious layer{Raw subconsciousness of decaprio i.e the limbo where mal and cobb lived for years together},fischer is alive [This is explained in the dialogue where they talk before starting on the van about what happens in a limbo and what happens when the man gets killed in dream while he is sedated in the layer above.]
6. de caprio meets mal [ his own projection] and gets to know where Fischer is.

Nandan: yes

karthick: 7. After finding fisher, de caprio tells the girl and fischer to go into the kick and wake up in the layer
above....and as there are synchronized kicks...they will be continuously woken up in their layer above...so on until the real layer[ie in the plane]

Nandan: :)

karthick: 8. Now, de caprio is left in the van inside water...and he is still 3 layers deep in the subconscious. Japanese guy who is dead in level 3 has gone into limbo state. Now, Caprio who is dead in van joins the limbo state. Since Saito has been before him, limbo has been populated by Saito.

.
9. Now, you have to recollect a scene where de caprio and japanese guy meet in the heli pad....the set of dialogues [Some imp words ] that follow in the scene where de caprio meets the old guy is the same [ Leap of faith, Old man with regrets, honor the arrangement - This can be thought of as words reflected from his subconscious and may be who ever knows about limbo and has been there knows about the leap of faith factor as well. May be that is why mal talks about that before she jumps or thats the inception that De caprio did to her and she had told to saito about that in the first audition....].

Nandan: yes

karthick: 10. why is the old guy old? because, he has died several minutes before in the layer above....means that would have transformed into several years [in limbo state especially ] in the layer below...so by the time de caprio finds the old guy it has already been several years have passed for the japanese in that state.

11.Now read the 10 points above and tell me what was your question
?

Nandan: right right
i think it gets clarified

karthick: hmm...
But....intentionally director keeps it unclear how de caprio and old man escape back to reality in plane

Nandan: i was thinking that when de capiro is recovered by this old man guys on the beach that was one more level deep

karthick: No

Nandan: is your theory remains same on pulling the trigger

karthick: May be....

Nandan: to sysnc events

karthick: thats one way ..Yes...the old man pull the triggers and both of them as they are aware, they continuously kill themselves in the layers above and wake up simultaneously with the other guys in the plane.....but the director has not shown it clearly and
and at the end
may be the top fell a little later...but he didn't show it either.

Nandan: yes
last scene

karthick: All the director have liked to convey is There is just a fine line that divides dream and reality and the line is rarely obvious..To define a line and take a stand is left to you. But, This world may not be real. Neither the other one you believe it would be. That is the inception that the director does to his audience. Leap of faith is needed but it doesn't matter. !!

Nandan: :)

karthick: There is a technical flaw in this movie...but that might be boring as it is purely a issue in the possibilities of human subconscious...

Nandan: tell me whats tht

karthick: When they say they go into subconscious of others and steal, how come they are conscious of their thought...when they are dreaming, the visuals are just projections from subconscious onto the conscious.....and not vice versa
where as in Inception, they kind of project what is there in their consciousness to the subconscious of some one else
But still, it can be assumed that the sci fi equipment helps them do that trick

Nandan: may be
they are connected thru some equipment
and that makes them control their subcons

karthick: yes. but they don't discuss about whether the instrument is capable of keeping the dreamers conscious and their
thoughts active while they themselves are dreaming...i.e when the team is dreaming, they can all be connected only at the
subconscious level. How do they even think that they are there for a job. they Have to steal some info from the subject????
thats where the doubt for me is.....I convinced myself that the instrument helps them do it

Nandan: hmm
instrument is the only explanation to this i guess

karthick: ha ha...do we have a choice
:D

Nandan: no
diro has not left any
:D

karthick: but I am safely back home after watching the movie twice and i have checked with my totem...I am back to reality

Nandan: heheh
and u will definitely not reveal ur totem :P

karthick: No way. :P

Nandan: haha

karthick: But surely this is one hell of a movie

Nandan: yes

karthick: In IMDB you don't find any goofs...i just found one interesting thing...In the hotel scene, the girl's hair is
tightly tied ...and they had to do it..because next few scenes will have Anti-gravity shots and the crew didn't want to
bother about the way her hair will swing in that condition

Nandan: hmm

karthick: been a really big discussion
I am going to copy paste this chat log for my reference
If some one else asks me the same question, i can direct them to this chat
:D

Nandan: :)

karthick: I can't really explain it myself again...
:D

Nandan: yes
valid doubt right
haha

As the movie ends, All I remember is "You're waiting for a train. A train that will take you far away. You know where you hope the train will take you, but you can't be sure. But it doesn't matter because we'll be together."

The top is still spinning !!!!

[THE END]

My Short film - In a conversation

2010-05-20T00:02:00.000-07:00

I recently worked on a short film - "In a conversation". This film is about the simplicity of thinking in kids. The basic theme is to show the contrast between a grown up and a kid and the simple and convincing reasoning by the kid is made evident in a conversation. The film closes by showing the elder one amazed by the shrewdness exhibited by the kid and laughs at herself for looking into complex books for reason and logic. after all, logic and reason are required to convince oneself. If the reason is simple, it is even more better.

I have shot in a slow dramatic style showing sequence of events which lead to the conversation.

Comments are welcome.

Link : http://shootingpeople.org/watch/film.php?film_id=86599